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What is love?

lostlife65
lostlife65
I've been married for nearly 20 years. Have 2 kids, 26 and 16. The eldest is my stepchild.

I got married in a knee jerk reaction. I care about her but don't know if I really love her. I care about my kids too, but don't know what love really is to say I love them. I mean I guess I do, since I would do anything for them, and if i had to give up a kidney or something I would.

But is that what love is? I've had weekends to myself and have enjoyed that and not missed anyone. Is that right?
deleted_user
deleted_user
there are lots of definitions, but it usually involves actions, loyalty, trust and like everything else in this world it is patience.
heretic
heretic
Nothing wrong with enjoying time alone, it doesn't mean you love your family any less. And yes, giving up a kidney for someone is an act of love. But love is most often shown in the little actions, not the huge sacrifices.
charliegirl29
charliegirl29
I do not think there is one definition of love because there are different forms of love to me and even then you cannot define it but it is something that returns even when you do not want it to return and It will not be denied :-).
deleted_user
deleted_user
everyone needs me time, theres nothing wrong with that. the only person that can say what love is, is ur ownself. it varies, theres different elements to it.
its that feeling you have when around someone, everytime you see them its feels like for the first time and you get that feeling in ur stomach, it hurts to be away from them, when ur not with them ur thinking about them.
billwfriend
billwfriend
some time ago I was involved with some people who taught me that GOD is love....
lostlife65
lostlife65
Derek
I have thought and hear that a lot about having a feeling inside when you are with someone and I do not have that feeling with my wife. I don't know if I ever really had it. Never really had a serious relationship before her. I could have been like a kid getting a new toy. After a while it wears off.

Thanks everyone for your help.
deleted_user
deleted_user
its ok to be by yourself. i admit it i feel at times people can be so annoying . so i stay by myself. love to me is loving yourself enough to know to get rid of the fake people around you. love to me is enjoying life by doing what you like and not giving a damn about what this so called normal world wants us to do.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Love isn't so much a feeling as much as it is a decision. There are many different types of love, I'm sure u know. You feel the decision of love deep down in your soul. If it's there u know that u know it. If it isn't, I would figure out why. Love for anybody or anything is not something u can force to happen. It's just something that is, and comes on it's own when u least expect it.
healingslowly
healingslowly
I think that love does not require any type of reflection to see whether or not one is in love. It is just there.

Perhaps the issue is not whether or not you love this woman, but that you are suffering from some kind of depression, etc. It may be clouding your true feelings. My concern (as your wife) though would be that you feel you got married with a "knee jerk reaction" and that you can verbalize that you are not sure you love her. How does she feel about you?
healingslowly
healingslowly
PS And your kids -I did not mean to omit them
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