Loneliness Support Group

Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...

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carol12 05/17/2017

I am divorced and have no family. My Mum is the only one left. She's 79 and lives in Somerset. I have 2 sons at University. I don't miss them that much as we are always in touch with messages/skype etc. The lonliness often comes on at night. I keep busy during the day. Also, I often have to go to things on my own. I did everything with my exhusband. He left me almost 10 years ago for someone 20 years younger than him, but it still reallly hurts. Tney are married and have their own children and my sons have an extended family when they are with my ex, his new wife and, of course, half brothers. They love their Dad and I wouldn't have it any other way. I on my own for Bank Holidays. I used to love them, but now I'm on my own. Christmas and Easter my sons are usually with me, but they have started living their own lives. Last Christmas I was expecting my sons to be here on Boxing Day, but at the last moment they went to their Dad's. There aren't any trains, so they asked if they could use my car. It would seem very petty to say no and my sons would resent it and not understand why, so I was alone on Boxing Day and felt very miserable and lonely. The same at New Year. When I was in a couple I had no desire to go out and one year I was invited to a party. I hate it when the fireworks go off on New Year and on bonfire night. I say to everyone including my sons, that I'm fine, but I'm really not. I hope someone will reply, particularly if they are in the same situation.

Gail59 05/17/2017

Yes, I have been lonely even as part of a married couple for many reasons. For your sake however, I would tell your sons how you have been feeling and not have the need to always say you are fine when you are not. They need to think of their Mom's feelings when they go off to see their Dad, especially if they take your car and leave you alone? None of this sounds fair to you at all. It seems to me that their father needs to take some responsibility in all of this. After all he's the one who split up your family. I would not put up with this any more and start speaking your mind because even it it makes you feel a little better it will be worth it. You haven't done anything wrong, but your husband in the minds of many people has. I would think that if they really care about you love you they would want to know how you actually feel. As young men don't they also need to understand that in life there is always give and take and not to be so self centered? I would at least give them a chance when and if you decide to be honest with them regarding your feelings. Take care and God be with you.

carol12 05/18/2017

My sons do love me, but I find it hard to pin them down and not sound as if I am hassling them for reason. It's very difficult, as a Mother to admit that I am feeling down, especially when they're going to see their Dad. My ex-husband is supportive when it comes to dealing with my sons need to be talked to for a negative reason, which is good as we are together. He has never been helpful when it comes to arrangements for my sons to see him. In fact he has totally ignored me and just communicates with my sons (22 and 20). I have to rely on them to let me know. He's laid back and often doesn't tell my sons until the last minute them. This is what happened on Boxing Day. I had planned the food and what we were going to do on Boxing Day and my sons told me late on Christmas Eve that they were going to see their Dad on Boxing Day. I felt shocked and hurt inside, but it was all about about me laying my own plans and not communicating them. In hindsight, I should have asked them if they were going to be doing something with their Dad over Christmas. He just ignores me though and always has. It's like flogging a dead horse! Boxing Day was when I found this site.

This is only part of the problem. I have no one really close to me. My Mum is not a good person to confide in. She's 79 and, whilst a very strong personality, would just feel guilty and worry about the fact that she couldn't be there. Talking to her on the phone is not a good idea as very little time is spent on my problems and then is 3/4 of a hour at least about her! So, she's not a good person to confide in.

That is where I get so lonely. I posted on Boxing Day because I felt really down, but only just realised that I had been sent a hug. It is those times when others are with their families that I really suffer from Loneliness and need some support at those times, but that's not always possible. Thanks for your support.

steleo93 05/22/2017

Hi,

I just read this as I'm new to the site, but I'm so sorry that your sons did that to you. I'm sure they love you, but that must have been very difficult for you. Feel free to reach out of you ever need someone to talk to!

Padme 05/22/2017

Hello, I can somewhat relate. My only friend is my husband and I know it's not healthy. I do things with him and my daughter so I actually find it a treat to do things alone. So I guess we are not alike in that way, but I do understand the feeling of isolation that you expressed. That's nice that you Skype so often with your sons! Take care. :)

Shadeofviolet 05/23/2017

U seem like a good person. But even so sometimes u have to tell about ur real feeling or situation to others. Ur sons are young they cannot understand completely what u r going thru. U must tell them sometimes. Being a mother doesn't mean u cannot be weak .
Do not force them to change their plans or push them to spend time with u but do tell them what u feel n how lonely u feel sometime.

paiste7 05/24/2017

I am so sorry! You sound like such a great and kind person. I am so sorry about all of this. You sound like a Mom with unconditional love. Be kind to your Mom (as I am sure you are) and love every second you have with her (which I am sure you do).

I am here to listen and help in anyway that I can. Hugs!

cyndazzle1967 05/27/2017

I know how you feel I am alone 24 hours a day and add being lonely too im sad I feel worthless were I live the only people who want to be friends with you are if you have something im sorry for what you are going threw we can be friends I will listen to you when you feel alone or need to vent or even if you just want to talk

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