Loneliness Support Group

Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...

11,068 Members
10,372 Posts
1 Online
Mental Health
/ Loneliness Support Group

online dating sites

drew4lostluv
drew4lostluv
I have started dating again and am using the meetme app on my phone to find people to date. I have been on a few dates where the women are so obsessed with the idea of having a serious relationship that they have forgotten that it takes time to get to know someone. Blind dates are for meeting people and seeing if you find them attractive and compatible with you. That's how I see it and I have made friends. I haven't found that special someone. I found 1 attractive but she wasn't right for me and I told her that she wasn't but I would like to be her friend. After a bit of a little argument she aggreed. I have met some really nice people and have made new friends. I actually ate dinner at a new friends house for Easter. She's a great friend but that's all it will ever be. I have to admit that I feel blessed to have these new friends but I worry that they are attracted to me and are only being nice because they want more even though I made it clear that friendship is all I want. I know that I have to fix me first before I can get in a serious relationship but I do like to date casually. I go out and I have had a relationship or to that were intimate and I made mistakes. I learned from those mistakes. When I go on these blind dates I tell them that I either made a good friend or I have met someone that I would like more with. I also tell them that I want them to be honest with me and how they feel. If she doesn't think that anything more than a friendship will happen after our date to just be honest because I am going to be honest with them. I think it is the best way to date, if you don't really know them. I would date people that I know if I had more of a social life but I don't. It's not by choice. Just the way cards have been dealt in my life. I love being around people and if given the chance I would go out all the time. I do feel blessed that I have made friends. I don't lie to them. I tell them exactly what I want with them and some have a problem with it, others are happy to have me as a friend. I think that I need to make some guy friends but I don't really know how to do that. I like the company of women better anways even if it's just a friendship but I think I am missing something not having a guy friend. Someone that I can just shoot the s___ with. What do you think?
drew4lostluv
drew4lostluv
Oh and I did get hurt by a girl that I fell for but that was before I decided to date by these rules that I set up and haven't been hurt much sense.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Hi Drew: I think you're a good guy and have suffered a lot of pain and hurt.

What I and others have discovered in life is that you actually acquire a small amount of "real" friends in this world and the others are simply acquaintances.

And it takes a long, long time before someone becomes a "real" friend and gets allowed to know all the things about you that are personal, private and all the things that could eventually be used to hurt you at some point. But they're also the people that are there when things get really bad.

I say this to help you and not to hurt. Please go slowly on the "friends" because people that you turn down on dates, you are gathering up as friends and they really are acquaintances that went out on a date looking for romance and may still be hoping for that from you. Be careful because you don't know them well enough or long enough for them to be "real" friends. Take care and many hugs.
shelle68
shelle68
I think being honest and up front is great. setting rules and limits is also very healthy. You are on the right track.
Yes, you need to heal yourself first, before you can be in a healthy relationship.

YOu and I are in the same situation.
billwfriend
billwfriend
share that app with us...I don't know about it....
Calebb
Calebb
OKCupid.com is a good site. A person can write up a personality-type test or personal-style test hirself; so there are practically hundreds of tests to take.

The staff of this site is 20 ca. young people, many of them psychology majors or anthropology majors. Good-natured people, not corporate types.

cheers
drew4lostluv
drew4lostluv
Meetme.com it's a free site that popped up on my phone. It gives you a list of locals around your area or around the country. I look up locals because that's the only way you can actually get dates if you aren't rich and can't afford to go thousands of miles to just hang out. I know that it will take time for me to be ready for something serious right now but if I meet someone that I really like I won't turn them away.
billwfriend
billwfriend
I have okcupid already....
gustokitty
gustokitty
Hi drew, So are you saying you just are not interested in a romantic relationship? That's kinda what is sounds like, you seem all too eager to stop anything before it starts. Why not just set your profile as looking for "friends" of opposite sex. If anything grows beyond that, its a bonus. Maybe take the pressure off of you, and not waste the time of the woman looking strickly for a romantic connection?
gustokitty
gustokitty
just checked it out...answered about 30 questions, then tried to back up and lost them all, plus my name already taken. I'll try again this week. Thanks 4 the tip.
billwfriend
billwfriend
Android or Iphone or both?
drew4lostluv
drew4lostluv
I only had sex with a few of the women that I had met. I am still getting over my ex and chasing a feeling that I had for her. I am just out to make friends without sex getting in the way of friendship. I don't feel right when I'm feeling down thinking about my ex and trying to have sex with some random girl. I think I have met at least 2 really nice women that just want to hang out and have a little fun. And when I say fun I mean seeking friendship with someone. I am actually very open with 1 of them and she is very open with me. I know that we will never be more than friends but just having a friend is something new to me. I do keep myself guarded and I don't really share everything that has happened the past 4 years. My friend asked if I wanted to hang out at her mom's because her mom has been in bad health and she had to stay there and care for her. She has an 8 year old girl and given the recent history with me dealing with my stepson being a pedophile and blaming myself for it I didn't feel comfortable with not sharing that information with her. So I told her about this site and gave her the name of my profile so she could read it. She did and told me that she knew that I had nothing to do with any of that mess and that I was a good person. I felt relieved and I went over there last night and we all had a great time. I actually feel like I made friends with the whole family. The mother and daughter really like me. I am not worried about her having feelings for me. She was on the dating site talking to guys asking me what to say to them so I think that I am in the friend zone where I wanted to be in the first place. I actually think I made a good friend.
Posts You May Be Interested In