Loneliness Support Group

Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...

11,068 Members

10,372 Posts

2 Online

hurtingheart 09/13/2017

I am so sad and lonely. I am that one at work that is all smiles. That will do anything to help, cheer you up or make you smile. And yet, when I am low, when I am down, and I reach out - I am met with being shut out. They distance themselves from me. I can't lose another "friend". No one texts me at night. No one invites me to things. I have my kids, and I love them, but I need adult conversations. I need someone who if I say I really need to talk right now, that would not shut me out - but come over with a cup of coffee and a hug. Is this really too much to ask? Am I being completely unreasonable? I mean I know people have lives, I just want to be a part of someone's life too.

yanonuci 09/13/2017

I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling left out. You seem like a very considerate person. It is understandable to feel hurt when that same amount of care is not reciprocated.

Camogirl 09/13/2017

I know that feeling all to well. Im that person in my group of friends and family too always there dropping whatever im doing to be there for them at a moments notice but when im the one that needs someone theres never anyone around. I have gotten way too good at smiling through the pain. I understand what your feeling and if you like you can take to me.

hurtingheart 09/13/2017

Thank you Yano, it's nice to have some understanding.
Thanks Camogirl, I will be there for you too. If you ever need me.

djchurn 09/13/2017

For many years I came to regard work as place for knowing people. Upon retirement, I was in for as lesson. I too had been very gregarious at work and thought of that as popularity. Didn't realize that in life there usually isn't a captive audience. Be glad that you realize that work does not fulfill your social needs, find activities that will put you in contact with others. Hobbies, Church, volunteering...
Focus on improving you out of work life and then you can say that you have tried.

hurtingheart 09/13/2017

Thanks DJ. I'm trying, its hard though. I have time for Work, my children and sleep - very little time left for hobbies or volunteering

MJ1964 09/13/2017

Hello hurtingheart.. I've been there as well. Most of the women who I work with are upbeat and very social. I am very shy, so I tend to be left out of most conversations, and even events. As far as being there for others I tend to shy away from that as well. I really wish I had an outgoing personality, but God made us all different, and unique in our own way I guess. Hang in there. Hope is gets better for you..

hurtingheart 09/13/2017

Thanks MJ. Can I just say I love shy people? I think you have beautiful souls and when you choose to open up it's just that much more special. I would never exclude you. I hope it gets better for you too.

victor 09/13/2017

Sorry to hear that "the heart is a lonely hunter." I think I know how you feel. When someone needs information or something solved, they ask me, but when I need something, they all assume that I can take care of myself. I think we live in the "me - me" generation. Many people forget what it is to be a friend. I would suggest continue to reach out, and there must be someone out there for you. I had been lonely for decades due to mental illness. Believing in yourself and that it will get better will help. Good luck.

hurtingheart 09/13/2017

Thank you Victor, I'm trying :)

lostsoul873 09/14/2017

Sorry to hear you are feeling this way. I can relate and though i love my children it would be nice to have some friends. work and children is all i know im here if you need a friend.

hurtingheart 09/14/2017

Thanks lostsoul, I can never have too many friends ☺️

trisha9054 09/14/2017

When I was divorcing I met a few people at Divorce Care. I was there when this one wanted to talk. I sat on the side of the road in my truck many times because I didn't want to drop her call. She was having a hard time. The one time I needed her to listen to me she didn't have the time. I never heard from her again. I felt very used. I've run across this many times and people just assume I'm the strong one who bolsters everyone up. That I don't need help so I no longer offer help. I have no friends in this town. People I do business with but not friends. I have learned to be okay with this.

hurtingheart 09/14/2017

You're stronger than I, Trisha. I think everyone needs someone they can lean on. I don't know if I'll ever be ok with it, But I completely get where you're coming from and hope that one day I can be.
I'm sorry that happened. For what it's worth you can talk to me anytime.

livingly 09/15/2017

I'm sorry you friends aren't supportive of you when your down. My situation is simalar to yours so I know how you feel.

vwidow 09/19/2017

Ahh, that fantasy cup of coffee and a listening ear (even just one!). Some people are all mouth and no ears, and that's no fun...We should be at least equal part ear and mouth but preferably more ear on both sides...! Trisha you sound like me all the way. I also just accept when I have no prospects for good companionship, but I don't like it.

Join the Conversation