Loneliness Support Group

Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...

11,068 Members
10,372 Posts
0 Online
Mental Health
/ Loneliness Support Group

How do you manage?

enigmaticloner
enigmaticloner
I'm extremely lonely a lot of times, the friends I used to hang out with as a kid/teen have all pretty much "moved on" with their lives, they either work and/or go to school, moved out of state, or have a girlfriend and whatever else keeps them busy. I on the other hand can't work because of my back problems among other things, and I don't go to school or anything so I'm home pretty much all day unless I need to go out and buy something or give someone a ride somewhere. I've met people online before when I used to be big on online gaming, but that's not what I'm into anymore really.

I just really feel conflicted, on one hand I really want to make some new friends to have someone to talk to, but I also suffer from social anxiety, and anxiety in general so it's very hard at times to talk or be around people. I'm also looking to get into a new relationship as I've been single plenty of time to consider things. It's not hard to imagine though that that is also somewhat problematic, meeting women or meeting new friends in general I just never been good at doing. I'm told that I'm shy, quiet, rude, etc. etc. and hard trying to explain to people that you have mental illness, they usually do not understand or get turned away by it. I've seen it happen already multiple times. I'm really just tired of spending these days inside fighting back tears and these feelings of giving up.
Razor91
Razor91
I have Agoraphobia so meeting people is tricky for me along with my anxiety, I've been semi struggling with the idea of being single and lonely, for now I just distract myself to keep from getting depressed, I think therapy might be beneficial for you so you can ease your fears but that in itself might be tricky when social anxiety comes into the mix.
enigmaticloner
enigmaticloner
I've tried seeing a psychologist for my depression but I wasn't able to continue seeing them because my insurance wasn't covering it for some reason. I've tried finding others to see as well but they either did not accept my insurance or they would say that they were booked for months in advance. It was very upsetting so I gave up looking for a while. I really do need someone to talk to, but I wish I could just find some good friends. At least they won't charge me to speak to me. I also struggle with the idea of being single and lonely my whole life, I've mentioned it to people but they just think I'm being dramatic or negative. I don't have a problem with my self confidence really as I have been told plenty of positive things about myself and realize them to be true, but it's just I have problems speaking to people, especially random people and in person at that. I usually get the feeling that I'm just bothering them more so than anything, probably because of my anxiety and the way I was treated by my so called peers when I was younger, I'm used to feeling like an annoyance more so than anything else.
sbnj
sbnj
Enig.....geeeeze your soooo annoying! lol j/k

In all seriousness, Im on the same boat as you for the most part as far as the friends go. I used to play EQ2 online and devoted a lot of time to that and thought of those people as my "friends" too. Just got burnt out on it one day and stopped playing.

When you say.......

I'm told that I'm shy, quiet, rude, etc. etc. and hard trying to explain to people that you have mental illness, they usually do not understand or get turned away by it. I've seen it happen already multiple times.............

who and at what point are you trying to explain this to? Just wondering because I find it easier to just hide it from everyone for as long as i can.
sbnj
sbnj
ps

i have kidney disease too.....the threat of dialysis is such a drag
enigmaticloner
enigmaticloner
Well I'm a pretty honest person for the most part so I try to explain it to anyone that seems interested in being a friend really. I do get tired of explaining things like depression and what not, and why I am the way I am(Which I don't even know why fully). It sucks about the kidney disease as well, do you also have PKD or is it something else? Also I'm quite younger than you so I (hopefully) have quite a while to go until dialysis or anything.
lunajonespotter
lunajonespotter
I understand what you're going through. I myself have no one at the moment and spend my days just watching T.V.
Desigol1979
Desigol1979
I feel alone because I can't plump up the courage for a relationship. Although I have plenty of platonic Female Friends, I can never be more than 'Just a Friend'.
enigmaticloner
enigmaticloner
Desigol, it seems like you do need the courage to tell some of these women that you're interested in that if they are not going to take you serious as a possible date then you can no longer be friends with them. I've had to do that multiple times, and it's caused friendships to end but it's for the best in my opinion. I take it as disrespectful if we can't talk about taking things seriously as a couple rather than being "just friends".
angeleyes92
angeleyes92
what is wrong with being a friend to a member of the opposite sex. my greatest friends in high school and college and even know are men. I might have wanted to date them at one time (except for those I've met in the last 25 years) but being friends with them has been great. Takes the pressure off of being with them and you can just have fun. Its better to have friends than to find yourself lonely and miserable because you are always looking for mr/miss perfect. I would rather a dozen friends and no mate than a mate and no friends
enigmaticloner
enigmaticloner
Nothing wrong with being friends with them if that's what you both want Angeleyes, I've just never been one to really have many female friends. It doesn't work out well usually, everyone is different though.
koolman
koolman
I keep myself busy doing videoing and video editing, for paying clients and just for my own personal passion projects. I exercise almost every day. I hang with a buddy. We watch, laugh at, discuss and critique Hollywood movies. I drink alcohol.
MissMack
MissMack
It's okay to be a homebody.
It's okay to be single.
I'm married, but I know that a person can live alone successfully and like it. Learn to enjoy your own company.

Contentment is a great goal.

Do the things that make you happy and joyful, even if you do them at home, alone. I don't need others to be happy; I daresay you don't, either, you just haven't discovered that fact yet.
enigmaticloner
enigmaticloner
There's only so much of being by myself that I can take though, the loneliness thing just isn't for me, to an extent of course. I love having time to myself, but not all of it, there's a big difference there. Company is not always great, but the right company makes all the difference.
MissMack
MissMack
I find that socializing online fulfills whatever needs I have.....of course, my adult daughter lives with me, so I don't live alone like you do.

And then, I have 3 dogs that are great company.
enigmaticloner
enigmaticloner
I never said I lived alone MissMack, but everyone is different, I don't know what you're seeing wrong with me feeling down from loneliness. There's other people here as well saying the same thing. If I'm not happy with the way things are, I'm entitled to feel that way.