I have been doing it my whole life. It does hurt and it's tiring. But I can't seem to stop the cycle.
Sorry. That probably didn't help.

Try to say something positive about yourself each time a negative critique comes to mind.

you're right. comparisons suck.
we should not compare ourselves with others. we are all different , unique, worthy beings.
I had tormented myself for years, trying to compare myself to someone else.
remember: we are all unique.

i have done that for a really long time and i can't stop.
it's not a good idea.
i don't know how to stop though. 8[

comparison is good, a relationship is you in relation to another. You dont know who you are until you see the opposite of you. Example... see someone in prison and know you are free. Its important to know that who you are now is fine. Life would suck if everyone were the same.

also... as you look at others know that their inner thoughts are probably the same as yours.

I too can't help comparing myself to others in a unfavorable way. I always find that I come up short.

I read somewhere about starting a self-esteem file. You start by putting positive things that other people have said about you into it--things such as cards, notes, report cards, performance reviews, basically anything printed that has something positive about you written into it. Put photos of yourself into it--photos that someone has complimented you on.

After you've started collecting these items; I think the next step is to ask people who like, respect, admire, love, etc. you to write some positive things about you....put these into the file too.

Somewhere along the line you make a list of all your 'faults' and then compare that list to the nice things people have said about you. You have to cross off every negative thing that is disputed by something positive in your file....

There are several steps to creating this file...I've probably skipped most of them...lol. If I can find the written process...I'll post a link to it.

Okay...here is one version. It's a bit different than the one I was thinking of, but it could still be a valuable process (tough, but valuable):

http://www.beliefnet.com/Health/Emotional-Health/Bipolar/How-to-Start-a-Self-Esteem-File.aspx

If I find anymore, I'll post them. I should start a file for myself...like years ago!

Notice what's not so good about everyone else. Keep reminding yourself to look at their strengths and weaknesses and see that you're the same way.

Later on, you can work on stopping the habit altogether.

I do that all the time too, the only thing different I try and do is know that you are a good person that deserves love one day and wheter the other person seem better than you, you are a great human being. Learn to love yourself that'll make it go away, I'm not fully there myself but we can help each other out, Im here to listen if you need it.

I am thankful for your replies.

I do that, too. It's very hard to not do it. I'm still learning.

I am the same way too, I'm trying to break the cycle but it's gonna take time.
My advice to you is, be yourself and accept and love the way you are. We cannot be something we are not. Everyone has their own different life experiences. Take care.

I find it hard not to compare myself and you're right about it hurting your self esteem. I only have people online to compare myself to and sometimes I have to remind myself what I'm doing as we are all unique and different so we can't expect to be the same.

I recently had a really horrible dream where I was at a school reunion (something I'd never go to in reality!) and I was seeing lots of people who were in the same year as me and they had all done really well and I felt that I'd achieved nothing. I was relieved when I woke up but I know that's an area of my life I'll always be uncomfortable with and one where ignorance is bliss.

it is a bloomin tough one i got angry when boyfreinds did it to my face.. i think that triggered the whole thing,but lots of people suffer models actors musicians but its little comfort its sticking something in the cog when it starts!