Life After Divorce Support Group
This community is dedicated to starting over after a divorce. With the marriage over, how do individuals begin a new chapter in their lives and what hurdles do they face? Divorce is often one of the most traumatic periods in a person's life. Studies show it is the second-most stressful event in life, after the death of a spouse.
I have a girflriend whom I have had for twenty years. I golf with her a lot in the summer. We were out last week and she told me she ran into my ex on the gof course with his friend. He asked her to join them and she did. I made a joke about it and didn't really think much of it. She asked me if I was bothered she golfed with him and I said not at all. I l wasn't. It was a coincidence they met up and who cares right? So, yesterday my six year old is on the phone after my ex texted me to ask if there was a problem as he had been trying to talk to her since nine a.m. The phone never rang once and that was his first text to me of the day so no idea what he was talking about. Anyway, I had our daughter call him and he told her he was out on the golf course with my girlfriend. So I texted friend later that day and asked how that happened. She said she texted him and invited him golfing! I was livid. I told her I was uncomfortable with that and she crossed a line and that I didn't want her golfing with my ex husband. I also called my ex and asked him what he was doing. When we were together he didn't like her and now he is golfing with her. I think it is not appropriate that they go out together golfing or hanging out period. I guess I don't really have a say in it but felt the need to express my opinion anyway. I am not jealous I just know that they will be talking about me as they have both already told me they did. What do you guys think?
Hang in there, she's not much of a friend to be doing this. Just realize you will lose some friends and you will gain others. Hugs
just seperated from husband 9 months, and still friends will everyone but I find it hard to know that I was confiding in a few people and then see them talking to my husband.
I don't know how to get past the betrayal that I feel, in my head I know that they can be friends with both of us.
Our kids play competitive sports so we have a tight circle of friends, I know they can't pick sides and shouldn't be expected too but I find myself not talking to anyone for fear what I say could be misconstrued and come back to bite me.
I do know thou that my 3 best friends (all female) would run him over with their cars if I truly wanted it.
If this is someone who is truly a good friend they should not be out golfing, if it is someone who you've only known for 20 years and not a good friend I guess I would feel its ok
What I hate is that a break up also cause you to realize that good friends just weren't
That is absolutely one of the most difficult parts of divorce and the longer the marriage, the worse it seems to be. When I was going through it, I had to face some cold, hard facts -- one of which was so many people who I THOUGHT were MY friends merely stuck their heads in the sand; others appeared to side with my lying, cheating now-X. My therapist said, "You are going to find out WHO your true friends are and who were just "social friends"" -- and she was absolutely right.
Rainietoo - I sure don't like the sound of this scenario and I think I would be pulling way back from this so-called friendship. It's way too soon for you to have truly ambivalent feelings about it all. Protect yourself from further hurt; cool it with this friend for now.