No you are not wrong, You did say you were sorry to her. Some people take longer to recover from things then others might expect. A woman's heart is deep waters. Sometimes we can sink in it. Perhaps you can try communicating clearly what it is that causes your frustration. What triggers your anger. Then you both can work to avoid those triggers. not assuming, but perhaps there is something in her heart that causes her to shut down when she feel a threat of some kind. those threats don't have to be real or implied, it may only seem to her and thus closes her spirit. Open her spirit through openness and continue to flow to work through the conflict together. She can take responsibility for owning and working through her emotions. It will get better in time and you both will be better for it.

if you are taking your anger out on her then yes. i feel know one should be yell at. and maybe you have said your sorry so much that she don`t believe you anymore . i am sorry should mean .i will try not to do it again.

Hi ya ~

Ya know, both men and women have feelings and like life to be 'peaceful'. Not many of us like conflict or sudden violent behaviors in our lives. 'Taking things Personally' is what we do as human beings *wink

All your life there's going to be some 'circumstance' that gets that lovely adrenaline flowing; from a small gentle flow that fades quickly; to a large, rushing river that flows out hard and brutal into the environment around us. I know it can really feel good just to let that brutal animal anger out...Oh Yes. But that's what punching bags and gyms are for *wink

It's really up to each of us to learn what triggers those huge over-the-top adrenaline flows; why and how we express it and most importantly to realize we are fully accountable for the very real, normal, human reactions to our temper.

There are several people throughout my family who have had to deal with extreme temper problems. It became a huge problem in all their relationships (employment, family, lovers, friends); so I'm thinkin' hon, you may want to find out where that Rage lives in you; identify its source; understand it; lasso it; and then learn to either stifle the source or how to control it; so you can show your negative feelings in a calmer more healthy way. I'm pretty sure if you don't get a handle on it..it's going to be a one of those little demons that haunt you and ruin all the good things life offers you :O/

(hug)
Take care of yourself!!!

Not to play devils advocate, but the word "sorry" should not be used lightly. (I am assuming this happens a lot by your statement that this only happens when "she" doesn't listen.) You've admitted that you have a temper. I am totally serious when I say....you need to look up the difference between assertiveness and aggressiveness. You can still get your point across , but when you learn to assert yourself....there is no need for a temper......Just something I learned a longggg time ago. Good luck. I hope I didnt come across in a harsh manner....but if you truly learn the art of assertion....you will be amazed at how many doors this will open up between the two of you.

i agree w nottingham,,,, thank you for sharing,,,,, and i wish you the best,,, anger can ruin the bst of situations, ,,, anger is fear so when anger sticks its head up quest is what r you afraid of? fear of loss? fearof?? maybe u can fill in the blanks if not here then to urself.... wish u the best,,, KD

Hi there, Shirayla,

I'm sorry to hear you're going through a rough patch right now. I took a quick look at your journal before I started writing here. From what I can see, you have also been dealing with anxiety, rage and self-hurt challenges, yes? I do agree with All here and their shared words of wisdom, and especially so where it comes to violent energy (perceived or actualized) and the word "sorry."

One of the things that you wrote that stands out to me at this moment is that you feel you're not being heard, which brought to my mind a couple of things that I'll try to share real quick here.

If you don't already have one, it might be helpful to get and use a personal journal so that you feel you are hearing yourself. When we do not listen to our inner selves, it can happen that we turn our internal battle outwards to others who have nothing to do with our inner struggle.

Another thing that comes to mind is the "Talking Stick" from some of the Native American Indian tribes.

http://www.acaciart.com/stories/archive6.html

If you read all what the Talking Stick represents and is intended to do, this instrument can become a very good meditation tool as well as a helpful communication tool both for you and those who care about you.

I am sending prayers for Blessings your way, 'An it harm none, Blessed Be
Toni ~ AyniaNightFish...
...Family With My Beloved CroneLunaWulf And All Our Kindred Fur, Feather And Fin Spirits...