Lesbian Relationship Challenges Support Group
This community is for those who are in a gay marriage, and the unique challenges that may be had in a same-sex relationship. Find support and talk to others in a same-sex marriage, and get advice from the experiences of other members.
2009fireangel
Okay so here's the deal my lovely friends who I have enjoyed conversation with in the past few weeks.
In August I met this girl. Who is also my resident advisor (yea i know don't mix business and pleasure but i will explain it all) By the end of this year she will not be my Resident advisor anymore. She is really gorgeous and totally my type (yes i have a type don't judge) in the beginning of the year I found out she was bisexual when i asked.
Since she is bisexual this put's me at ease considering all bisexual girls i have dated have in turn hurt me and broke up with me and dated guys.....this leads into the other problem.. The only problem with this is she tends to act more "straight" always talking about guys etc and putting on some type of front. Granted she is also in the army. As well as she has this Women belong in the kitchen mentality with herself. I really like her... and using a friends facebook i told her so without letting her know it was me.
So that night we went to paint our freedom expression tunnel and she tend to stay around me and flirt with me some... even though I could of read that wrong. I tried to get a "date" with her before our thanksgiving break but she was busy... also i kind of took that as she was avoiding it.... so I haven't tried again since I've been hesitant.... Her best friend is back from basic training so i haven't seen her much.
Well she also sent me a message of a camo bead spread she saw and thought of me. ( cause i want go into the army too) so i got to thinking in a last stitch effort to see what she likes and what she wants... I want to get her a present it's a army build a bear and i felt it is seriously from the heart...
So i was wondering should I keep trying by getting her this gift?
Should i just let it go because it shows what she maybe obviously wants....?
Should i just not go with her because she is bisexual? (I know that's biased but i mean i have a less chance getting hurt finding a lesbian)
What do you think my friends??
In August I met this girl. Who is also my resident advisor (yea i know don't mix business and pleasure but i will explain it all) By the end of this year she will not be my Resident advisor anymore. She is really gorgeous and totally my type (yes i have a type don't judge) in the beginning of the year I found out she was bisexual when i asked.
Since she is bisexual this put's me at ease considering all bisexual girls i have dated have in turn hurt me and broke up with me and dated guys.....this leads into the other problem.. The only problem with this is she tends to act more "straight" always talking about guys etc and putting on some type of front. Granted she is also in the army. As well as she has this Women belong in the kitchen mentality with herself. I really like her... and using a friends facebook i told her so without letting her know it was me.
So that night we went to paint our freedom expression tunnel and she tend to stay around me and flirt with me some... even though I could of read that wrong. I tried to get a "date" with her before our thanksgiving break but she was busy... also i kind of took that as she was avoiding it.... so I haven't tried again since I've been hesitant.... Her best friend is back from basic training so i haven't seen her much.
Well she also sent me a message of a camo bead spread she saw and thought of me. ( cause i want go into the army too) so i got to thinking in a last stitch effort to see what she likes and what she wants... I want to get her a present it's a army build a bear and i felt it is seriously from the heart...
So i was wondering should I keep trying by getting her this gift?
Should i just let it go because it shows what she maybe obviously wants....?
Should i just not go with her because she is bisexual? (I know that's biased but i mean i have a less chance getting hurt finding a lesbian)
What do you think my friends??
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That said, let me offer my opinion on one of your questions:
"Should i just not go with her because she is bisexual? (I know that's biased but i mean i have a less chance getting hurt finding a lesbian)"
I do not believe for one moment you have any less of a chance being hurt by a bisexual woman than by a lesbian. Dating lesbians only does not decrease the odds of you being hurt. It just increases the odds of you being hurt by a lesbian. (How do you like those statistics? LOL).
Also - it sounds like your friend is all over the board with respect to what she wants from you. Given that she is your advisor, I imagine she is bound by some sort of ethics rule to not get involved with her student clients. Why don't you wait until she is no longer your advisor before you pursue her?
And - what is an "army build a bear" ?? I must be completely out of the loop....
"I do not believe for one moment you have any less of a chance being hurt by a bisexual woman than by a lesbian."
That should have read: "I do not believe for one moment you have any MORE chance of being hurt by a bisexual woman than by a lesbian."
Too early here on the west coast.....need more coffee!!
as per your predicament....i'd say i'd be more worried that about this "front" that she puts up and that she is not facing whats real and true in her life...and that could be a problem.. i say give it a go..you just never know..
Peace to you!
Army Vs. Girl sure... alot more dangerous but she's in the army too... so no harm done to be honest i think i'd rather be hurt in the army than a girl there is medicine that heals.... only little can heal a broken heart....
I know that I have the same change of getting hurt by either a bi or lesbian girl.. the point is she acts more "straight bi" and I've been hurt everytime by someone who is bisexual because they wanted a man more... the fact that she is either A. confused or B. hiding because of the army.. or C just really more into guys... makes it worse....
As far as the advisor thing I indeed know there are boundaries... but that means i'd have to wait till next semester make a move i guess what I am asking is should I at least find out if she's interested in me before I try to actually try to go out with her which would be after she is not my RA... because I don't want to wait for her... and then find out that she is not or was never interested...
Chic- you do make a valid point that not all bisexuals are confused... just the single ones i meet XD no offense what so ever though and I don't rule them out... I'm basically asking are the odds too against me to even try??? and that is the thing im worried about is it a front just because of circumstances or could it just be really how she feels you know?? if ya'll could answer the above questions maybe not the last one because you arn't her but i mean in general the others what do you think? that i have posted in here... .also
Mezza- Here is a army build a bear http://www.buildabear.com/shopping/productDetail.jsp?productId=prod80374
if she is leaning towards favoring men..then i would say there is an eliment of concern there, yes... and either A, B, or C will create a huge problem no matter how you look at it..