Lesbian Relationship Challenges Support Group
This community is for those who are in a gay marriage, and the unique challenges that may be had in a same-sex relationship. Find support and talk to others in a same-sex marriage, and get advice from the experiences of other members.
I am not out. Recently, a friend called me up and suggested we get a beer together and that sounded okay. So I meet him and we walked into this simple tavern with a western theme, and ordered a pitcher. The bartender was really tall and slim, very attractive. She chit-chatted with us a bit and we had a good time. On the way home, he says, "you know, she was wearing a gay pride belt buckle."
"What?" I asked.
"Yeah, she is gay."
"Wow, I didn't even notice it," I said, which I didn't.
"You know, I don't mind if she is gay, but I get really pi$$ed when they throw it up in my face like that."
I just stood there, stunned. I asked him if Christians pi$$ him off if they have he fish symbol on their car, or Jews if they wear the Star of David or football fans if they wear team jerseys.
I am just wondering how others would have handled this.
"What?" I asked.
"Yeah, she is gay."
"Wow, I didn't even notice it," I said, which I didn't.
"You know, I don't mind if she is gay, but I get really pi$$ed when they throw it up in my face like that."
I just stood there, stunned. I asked him if Christians pi$$ him off if they have he fish symbol on their car, or Jews if they wear the Star of David or football fans if they wear team jerseys.
I am just wondering how others would have handled this.
Like, as long as they don't date or talk about who they're dating, or express that they are gay in any way.
I don't think I can change anyone but I might be able to make them think.
So generally when I'm with someone who says something like that I'll say, "Hmmm... doesn't bother me. Kinda weird that it bothers you." Then I let it sit there.
Usually they don't want to talk about it, but if they ask "What do you mean?" it gives me an opportunity to say something they may hear. And I often say, "I just thought you were more open-minded than that."
It's sort of a way to help them see that their behavior doesn't integrate into who they believe themselves to be.
As a medical person, I have a dear friend who thinks that her every bowel movement MUST be a source of fascination to me! I have now told her that that is between her and the toilet roll.
Straight people don't need tshirts because their sexuality is advertised everywhere in everything. I don't think wearing a belt or a necklace is shoving anything in anyone's face and certainly IS NOT comparable to a bowel movement. It's just a quiet, tasteful way to show that you're different than the vast majority. The best way to crush any sort of discrimination is to be visible.
I dont use voilence