Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I am having a bad day emotionally, mentally and feel very depressed. I should have known this was coming (but not deserved) considering I have been feeling good for the past few days. It's almost as bad as d-day. I just keep thinking how CS could do this to me. It seemed we had a perfect marriage. We have talked about the A and she can't think of one reason why I am at fault. She swares I am the perfect husband and it was her that had issues. I can't make heads or tails as to why! Tonight is my son'e b-day and we have friends and family coming over. I now have to pretend all is ok as no one knows about this. CS is very hurt and remorseful for what she has done and her actions are showing it. We both can't sleep at night.
When I feel this crappy should I let her know how I feel and what's on my mind?
The only time I bring something up is at night (very rarely as this will cause us both to lose sleep), when we meet with MC or sometimes when we hug and I whisper to her "you really hurt me, I can't believe you did this to our family".
Sorry to rant but this is the only place for me, You have all been a big help.
When I feel this crappy should I let her know how I feel and what's on my mind?
The only time I bring something up is at night (very rarely as this will cause us both to lose sleep), when we meet with MC or sometimes when we hug and I whisper to her "you really hurt me, I can't believe you did this to our family".
Sorry to rant but this is the only place for me, You have all been a big help.
My wife and I had to set up "US" time to talk. We took walks after work together so that our talking and emotional baggage wasn't being felt in our home (which is supposed to be a safe haven for us both). It was a wonderful thing for us. The exercise made us feel generally better but then she got a chance to have it out on me but then we'd go home and be able to relax a little.
We are 10.5 months past dday and due to our promise to "walk and talk" with each other, our communication is stronger than ever. Don't get me wrong, this was not the ONLY time we talked about our emotions and issues. i got a lot of angry texts and emails throughout the workday and calls. As the CS, I felt it was my duty to be there for my wife at every moment when SHE needed it. And I had to make a promise to allow her to be there for me when I needed it.
The biggest thing I learned was that I can't keep it in. Not even to "spare her feelings" and that she couldn't do that to me either.
A CS that doesn't try to avoid these issues is a blessing to the BS. It allows us to heal.
I will add that when you talk to her.... there are rules that you must follow. No yelling or taunting. Just open and honest. I was always very matter of fact like when telling him how I felt. Sometimes there were tears and thats ok. But, abuse toward her is not ok, emotionally or physically. Also, trying to understand her pain and guide her through it is good medicine for you both.