I am so sorry, i am beside myself she is still calling. does he normally answer your phone?. can you change the #? there are ways around that too that I know all too well. how does he explain this? I dont mean to pry, so please forgive me if I have.

How pathetic that she is calling you. I would not answer my phone to any number I was not familiar with, especially a blocked number.

I don't know if this will help but, if all you hear is silence, it might not be her at all. Telemarketing autodialers dial 10 numbers at a time. The first person who answers gets the caller and the rest, if they answer, get silence. And many pf them block their numbers.

Let's book a flight and beat the crap out of her.
Kidding,sorta..

The first OW did this to me. She waited until he dumped her then I guess thought that getting to me would break us up.

I am sorry you have to go through this. It just keeps setting you back I am sure. Stay strong and power through. Hopefully it gets better or she gets tired and gives up.

She is calling our house phone. Not sure how since I put a block on blocked calls. But my guy the first time(we were in the movies) said her she can have fun talking to my nuts and put the phone in his lap. I waited five minutes(after laughing my ass off at the movie) and picked up the phone and asked her, "How did it feel listening to his nuts and being a piece of meat?" She didn't call back(that had been the 4th time calling. 2 at home # and 2 on OUR cell(only have one) This was a few weeks ago. Then she called again today. My guy answered told me it was her again( just breathing into the phone.) So I grabbed the phone and started to ask, "Is this the whore piece of meat again?" She hung up as I was say whore. But after my spaz out moment the day before I was still sensitive about the whole A. That it has crapped my day up. After getting to call her a piece of meat the first time I felt good. Kind of like I got to get it off my chest. But this time IT JUST PISSES ME OFF!!! I am just glad she went back to Montana.

And it was her because the creepy thing is you could hear her breathing. I know what the telemarket/debt collectors calls are like. They call wait for a minute and then answer like you called them. lol. This was answer hear her breathing(which is nasally) and then I get on the phone and she hangs up. She admitted to wanting him and thinking that he was the perfect guy. Native, has job, takes care of kids, and is a good house husband(with working). Also, she was in the middle of a nasty divorce because her husband cheated on her. >:-| There is a lot more to it but it is hard to explain.

Blueberrie,

It is very resonalbe to be angry at her. It is probably worth it to change your number. The real focus nees to be on your guy. If you and he handle it well together then the recovery from an affair can more to your relationship than the affair took away. If you trust, then let him answer the phone, and in your presence tell her what his boundaries are. "Do not call here again." " I am finished with you." I think that you being involved with her in any way is probably satisfying to her in some way. If she thinks she can provoke your feelings, then she is actually still involved. If all she gets is him hanging up on her, then you and he get to work together on your feelings together without her in the picture.

Tell him that her calls hurt and scare you. Tell him that your pissed off. He is obviously doing enough right by you that you didnt leave him, so let him love you through this by letting you vent about her at him.

Aristotle said that as long as anger is still in play then the relationship has hope. If you give up, then you stop being angry because your done, and they can no longer hurt you. So give up onher. Let her go. Make it clear that he can have either you or her, but if he chooses you then he needs to handle making that very clear to her if she ever calls again. Then sit back and let him choose you when she calls. If your afaraid he will choose her, then make that clear to him and work on that with him. Let him know what you need very clearly and then watch him try to meet that need for you. Being a guy he will probably suck at it, but if he loves you, like I love my wife, his effort will count for something in your heart.

Be angry. Be very angry. Its OK to be, you deserve it. Just be careful what you say and do when your angry, becuase it all has consequenses you don't get to control.

Hi Blueberrie02. I am so sorry that you are going through this. It's been 5 months for me as well after the DDay.

What is her purpose of still calling you? Is your H still showing signs that he is still with her?

I would say, you can try changing your phone number. If your H is already sincere and willing to work on your relationship, there shouldn't be any reason why she will find out about your new number. It's hard enough to accept what happened and this kind of situation will definitely not hep you guys to recover and rebuild the trust. I hope things get better for you.

its been 3 years since dday and just this week, 3 blocked calls. Threats or otherwise she will not stop. Lucky for me she only lives a short distance away!

I am so sorry to hear about the situation you are in. Do you have children together? If not you should DEMAND the he and her have no further contact. This means no phone calls, no Facebook, no emails and no text messages. Come to think of it even if you do have children, you should still DEMAND NO CONTACT. This is important if there should be any hope of reconciling. He should also display complete transparency, meaning that he should give you the passwords to ALL his email accounts and Facebook etc...

I hope these words can help you and your husband whether you decide to stay together or separate!!

blue i remember when you first came to this site we came about the same time. my dday was oct. 30 and although we are doing alot better there are still times when i feel like total shit pissed off at the world. keep ur head up friend dont give up!

I am luck that it only happened once and that she lives in Montana(2states away). I just hate feeling like there is something they have not told me. I hate wanting to know everything that happened. I was done feeling like this most of the time till hearing Ice Cube and her calling. Pisses me off. I have so much anger and don't know how to get rid of it.
BUT....Thank you to all who have given a kind word. It does help and means a lot.

The OW in our situation tried her hardest to keep one foot in the door. Phone calls, texts, emails, pictures ... driving by our house. I forwarded the naked picture she sent to her step-mother and MIL and everything abruptly stopped.

Do you know anything about her family? Is there a matriarch you can contact and say "Look - so and so is harassing us and won't leave my H alone. Can you please help her move on? There seems to be something seriously wrong with her that she's hanging on this long."

Sad thing is that I think she is doing it just to get at me. Because her sister was a very good friend of mine who my kids considered their aunt. The sister helped trick my guy to come over and get him drunk to hook them up. After that happened I told all their whorey secrets and now they pissed. And only want to make me hurt. But hopefully tomorrow will be a better day because I am so done with everyday feeling like my heart is gonna explode. Thank you all for everything.