I think you and your H need to steer clear of ALL contact with the OW and her H as you do NOT want to be drawn back into their drama. NO CONTACT PERIOD!! Work on your own marriage and write them off their problems are just that theirs! Oh and did I say... NO CONTACT WHAT SO EVER?

Well about the OW's H - I think he doesn't care and he is probably into an alternative kind of lifestyle himself. My H is into swinging - something he was into with his exwife, something that I thought he was finished with when he married me - found out last week he never stopped it. Needless to say I was shocked...whichs is another story.

However, my H in that situation would not care if his wife had sex with another man and he would welcome you both into his house.

Believe it or not there are men out there who have no respect whatsoever for their wives at all they would share them with other men.

NO CONTACT with either of them!!! They must have their own drama going on. Cut the ties and NRVER go back! They are both nuts if you ask me!!!! He must be a real WACKO!

NO CONTACT with either of them!!! They must have their own drama going on. Cut the ties and NEVER go back! They are both nuts if you ask me!!!! He must be a real WACKO!

I'm still trying to completely understand your question. Did you and your H actually go over to the OW's house or not? And if so, maybe the OW's husband had worked through all of his issues, had forgiven the OM and was adult enough to handle the situation among a group of mutual friends. There is nothing wrong with being cordial. Some people heal quicker than others and are able to let the past go.

So my question is if you were invited and you and your H didn't feel comfortable, then why go? My advice would be to just let the OW and her H go and continue healing and working on your own marraige.

Grace, I think you're CRAZY and need intervention because, it sounds like you're in Phase three going on Four in your delusion. Right now, I would say you need God, more than ever. If you believe in him than you should surly know that even he says to flee from lust.
prince

Some people NEVER GET IT.

Hey Prince249, thanks for checking on me but I do have GOD in my life. Have a lovely day :)

My main question is this.. How can the H of the OW even remotely want to have any contact with the man his wife had an affair with? Watch them hug and kiss (even peck) and be able to contain himself if he really truely cared about his wife?

Changed, is your H still in contact with the OW because you talk as if they see eachother frequently and exchange hugs. Or is this something that only happened once at the social gathering you are talking about?

Sometimes we keep asking ourselves the same questions over and over, why, why, why? And sometimes we'll never understand how or know the reason why. Maybe it's time for you to switch your focus from the OW's H and focus on your H and your marriage.

Do people have no shame these days? I don't think I could trust myself from knocking the living shit out of her!

I think you were correct in not going I believe in the no contact rule if an affair is finished. Social status be hanged. Nobody really gives a darn who is there and who isn't it there is talk it is over with within a day or two. Had i stayed with my cheater and the ow hugged and kissed some dam blood would have been flowing. No contact means no contact to me. I congradulate the two of you for thinking of the health and happiness of your marriage first.

thanks dodty and mskitcat

I think I smell a swinger.
To be quite plain, I would not be surprised if they have invited you over with a view to share a lot more than drinks.
I think, by reading replies, a couple others here do as well.
Believe me, my ex met some shady people in her little adventures. These people sound like some of her "friends"

"WOW"