Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
G'day guys,
Or is it night where you are? perhaps late at night and you can't sleep?
Those who have read my posts today will probably gather that at the moment I am pretty bitter and twisted, so I apologize if I have offended anyone here.
I am just curious as to what the red flags were that you noticed before you found out about your partners affair?
Here are mine.
My wife was allways a very passionate and highly sexed woman. She loved it, anyway, anywhere and often.
Then, out of the blue, about 3 years ago she went "away" to visit with an old girlfriend in another city for a few days and I was unable to contact her on her girlfriends home phone throughout her little trip.
When she came home, she was a different woman. She was not interested in sex with me, and it was 8 months before we had sex again.She became cold and aloof and subjected me to some of the most hurtful and nasty rejections to my advances that I can think of.
At one point, she even threatoned me with one of my best friends, a younger,fitter, stronger and better looking man than myself.
Now the sex, when we have it, is a chore for her and I suspect she only uses it as a tool to keep the piecs or as a reward when I spend an exhorbitant amount of money on her, and recently, even that doesn't get me into the sack with her.
Recently, I found a shit load of very sexy lingerie hidden away including a lot of silk and lacy stuff. I have never seen her wear any of this stuff and some has been worn and some still hase the tags on it. I would liken it to her finding a box of condoms in my drawer. (I have had a vasectomy)
Further, she has become very secretive with our computor. Secret email accounts that she minimizes every time I walk past or doesn't open at all until I am at work. History is being regularly deleted. She is also very secretive with her cell phone, taken calls and messages while shut away in her bedroom.
Her "away" trips are becoming more and more frequent and she is becoming even more distant and aloof.
I have confronted her (foolishly) about all of this of course and one of the answers she gave me was "I don't have to answer to you"
She tells me I need to trust her completely but how the hell can I do that when she keeps giving me soooo much stuff to be suspicious of.
Or is it night where you are? perhaps late at night and you can't sleep?
Those who have read my posts today will probably gather that at the moment I am pretty bitter and twisted, so I apologize if I have offended anyone here.
I am just curious as to what the red flags were that you noticed before you found out about your partners affair?
Here are mine.
My wife was allways a very passionate and highly sexed woman. She loved it, anyway, anywhere and often.
Then, out of the blue, about 3 years ago she went "away" to visit with an old girlfriend in another city for a few days and I was unable to contact her on her girlfriends home phone throughout her little trip.
When she came home, she was a different woman. She was not interested in sex with me, and it was 8 months before we had sex again.She became cold and aloof and subjected me to some of the most hurtful and nasty rejections to my advances that I can think of.
At one point, she even threatoned me with one of my best friends, a younger,fitter, stronger and better looking man than myself.
Now the sex, when we have it, is a chore for her and I suspect she only uses it as a tool to keep the piecs or as a reward when I spend an exhorbitant amount of money on her, and recently, even that doesn't get me into the sack with her.
Recently, I found a shit load of very sexy lingerie hidden away including a lot of silk and lacy stuff. I have never seen her wear any of this stuff and some has been worn and some still hase the tags on it. I would liken it to her finding a box of condoms in my drawer. (I have had a vasectomy)
Further, she has become very secretive with our computor. Secret email accounts that she minimizes every time I walk past or doesn't open at all until I am at work. History is being regularly deleted. She is also very secretive with her cell phone, taken calls and messages while shut away in her bedroom.
Her "away" trips are becoming more and more frequent and she is becoming even more distant and aloof.
I have confronted her (foolishly) about all of this of course and one of the answers she gave me was "I don't have to answer to you"
She tells me I need to trust her completely but how the hell can I do that when she keeps giving me soooo much stuff to be suspicious of.
1. ignoring his work cell phone when we were in the car together
2. saying he had to work late (on Friday nights!)
3. ignoring my cell calls and text messages when I went out of town (only to see my DAUGHTERS!!!)
4. accusing ME of fooling around when I went out of town.
5. extreme jealousy of my friends and family calling me, esp. on weekends and at night
6. disappearances during the day on weekends (when I suppose he was talking on the phone).
7. late night trips upstairs to the computer (for work, he said)
8. working on his laptop in the guest room...
That's all I can think of for now!
Lots of my red flags are the same as Dody's. She did well naming them. (Were we married to the same guy?! LOL -- just kidding!)
Hope things get better for you, man, no one deserves this.