Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I've been in a funk for awhile and can't seem to snap out of it. H and I had another talk last week about us both being totally honest and keeping no secrets. I simply told him that until I know everything you said to her and everything you did with her, you will always have secrets.He said "well, what do you want to know?" So I did ask one question that had been on my mind for awhile, but the answer was so-so. Meaning he tried to answer as best he could but reminded me it was a long time ago and he can't remember every single thing they said to each other.
So we were in the car later that day and he said "do you want to see where she lived?" I said why not? so he drove me there. It was an odd feeling to say the least. I asked him what he was feeling and he said "nothing" because this has been a done deal for him for a long time. He also asked if I would like to see where they went to have sex. { it was always in a vehicle} I declined that. As I said he was trying to bring everything out in the open so I didn't think he was trying to keep anything from me.
Yesterday he wanted to know what was on my mind. I told him to just forget about it because it would only make him feel worse and I would feel no better. It was anger and hurt and everything we had already gone over so many times.
So I wanted to know if we get to a point in this where time is all we have left to make us feel better. In the beginning when we had talks, we both felt better afterwards. But now it's just rehashing things that we have talked about already.
So is time all I have? What else can I say to him? I will say something if anything new comes along. But until then, should I just deal with these emotions mostly on my own because really, what can he do?
So we were in the car later that day and he said "do you want to see where she lived?" I said why not? so he drove me there. It was an odd feeling to say the least. I asked him what he was feeling and he said "nothing" because this has been a done deal for him for a long time. He also asked if I would like to see where they went to have sex. { it was always in a vehicle} I declined that. As I said he was trying to bring everything out in the open so I didn't think he was trying to keep anything from me.
Yesterday he wanted to know what was on my mind. I told him to just forget about it because it would only make him feel worse and I would feel no better. It was anger and hurt and everything we had already gone over so many times.
So I wanted to know if we get to a point in this where time is all we have left to make us feel better. In the beginning when we had talks, we both felt better afterwards. But now it's just rehashing things that we have talked about already.
So is time all I have? What else can I say to him? I will say something if anything new comes along. But until then, should I just deal with these emotions mostly on my own because really, what can he do?
Even though you feel like there isn't anything he can do, it probably isn't good to hold these emotions inside. And it might give him a false impression that you aren't feeling them anymore. Maybe pick one day a week to just talk about how you're feeling, even if it's the same talk each week, it is healing just to get it off your chest. And if you feel that you need to talk more than that, we are all here to listen and support. Big Hugs!!
Thankfully, things have gotten much better and time is definitely a help. If there are things you need to talk about, do it. Don't suffer in silence. You didn't ask for this pain. Just try to make sure the discussions are constructive. Hang in there. Sending you support.