FB is one of the ways I kept in contact with my OM.

My H read all of our messages after DDay. He also admitted that he had females that would send him inappropriate messages in his inbox and that he would allow flirting to occur. Now that we are rebuilding.

We have not dicided to close our accounts, we have given one another FULL access to our accounts.. Our status says We are Married to each other by name. We have deleted potential problematic friends and agree to no ex's or old lovers. We have made it clear that what ever you need to our friends that what ever you need to say should be said on the main page not the inbox. I have disabled the FB chat all together. FB can be a tool for the CS, but is a couple sets boundaries and establishes rules and a means to keep the FB experience honest, It can still be enjoyed.

Sorry for to mispelled words and typo's i was rushing. :-)

Still don't agree that FB is worth the risk. Married people should look to their spouse for intimacy and friends should be shared. That's what being married means to me (at least now, after my wife's affair(s).)

@sweetsacr....My ex cheated with numerous women on facebook. Perhaps you haven't really taken a long look at the site but i have and YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE SOME OF THE THINGS THAT GO ON THERE. I mean there are a great multitude of women and men who come right out and say the want to screw. Some have it on thier profile so u know exactly what your getting from the gate. VERY DISGUSTING AND SAD. It has poor people like US confused like hell. In a way it's as if a MAN can't really RUN from the temptation cause there are waaaaay too many people CLEARLY SAYING..I don't give 2 squats about your wife/husband or marriage. Look at the show cheaters and Maury who I watch daily. There are people who get on there PROUD AS HELL CHEST ALL STUCK OUT AND SMILING at the fact that they are on national TV exposing the fact that they have been sleeping with their best friend's husband or man..when Maury or Jerry ask why..I have heard oh so many times. His wife, her husband is NOT MY CONCERN, I'm THINKING ABOUT ME. It's TRAGIC...and I believe there are a great many people going straight to hell with gasoline draws on. I watch trying to grasp on to any reasoning...clarity behind a cheaters actions. STILL CAN'T UNDERSTAND....and the worst is when CHILDREN ARE INVOLVED...they don't care about that either....

(Caution: bad language. Turn away if that sort of thing offends you).

This is an oldie but a goodie:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7MuwPlOiNQ

I too am a victim of facebook...my husband had 2 emotional affairs and it all started through facebook. I believe that this social networking site is not evil in and of itself, but obviously there are those that cannot handle the temptations that lie there. And hey, if it wasn't happening through facebook it would be happening through something else...I have to come to grips with the face that my husband was going to cheat anyway. Still, I think people would be wise to be very careful of that site...sometimes I almost think these days people are too accessible. One of the women my husband got involved with was his ex-fiance from about 13 years ago...I tend to think that if these social networking sites weren't sooooo popular most likely she would have never been able to hunt him down in the first place. But on the other hand, he could have chosen to ignore her...it wasn't the first time she tried to start up something with him. Obviously the blame is on him. Either way, I will still always be wary of facebook in the future.

I am so glad I don't have a Facebook or any of that crap. Why spend time babysitting your spouse when you can get out there and live life?

The whole freakin' internet makes it that much easier for our cheaters to operate. The dating sites and social network sites are endless. Don't forget cell phones--more tools of the devil (and cheaters).

I love FB and even plan on creating a social media management biz.
I would never even consider having an affair on one of these sites. I have values and would not compromise those for any reason. My husband who is techno-phobic has had his affairs via the phone.
So if one has the desire they will, with what ever means are available.

Easier to catch them though...


,

I love the FB...but it is not a place where I post my childrens pics nor do I think its a good place to 'carry on the party'. I'm already embarrassed about how I dressed & acted in the 80's so.....

Anywho, the FB does make it easy for people to represent themselves in a false manner and start up relationships that they couldn't get the nerve to do in reality.

It's the people using the FB!

FB can be a bad place for interaction with old bfs and gfs, but people really need to take responsibility for themselves! I have a FB and I didn't start anything with anyone from my past in "that" way. I was friends and that is all I was. My H got FB and right away, some old gf finds him and the EA started then the A happened. He didn't take responsibility for himself. That is not FB's fault, that is HIS fault. If he would have ran into her by accident at the mall, I believe that the whole scenario could have still happened. It's not about FB so much as about the character of people that use FB. That is just my opinion and maybe not worth anything. We both still have our FBs, and I believe he learned a valuable lesson from what happened.

"It's not about FB so much as about the character of people that use FB."

Couldn't agree more Upset, everyone needs to take responsibility for there actions. I love FB and getting in touch with old friends. While I have been interacting with old friends I have not had an A with any of them. My H - different story.

The 2 he was dealing with have been deleted from his FB account but he has multiple ways to get in touch with them. Mutual friends, cell phone etc... So what do you do, delete the FB account, cancel your internet, cancel your cell and home phone?

These people just gotta grow up and use self control for petes sake.

Yes mom, there is so many ways for people to stay in touch with or without FB, so, you just have to trust, but once the trust has been betrayed, people tend to blame things like FB, or cell phones, or computers (basically technology). It's not the fault of technology, it's the fault of the weak person who chooses to make the decision to have an affair. There will always be ways for people to keep in touch with each other and more so in our futures I am sure, but the person themselves should be able to control themselves. Obviously these folks who cheat were missing something in the marriage or relationship to prompt them to move forward with someone else, it likely would have happened one way or another with someone, whether it was FB or someone they work with etc. It's like a ticking time bomb... Once the end of the fuse has been reached they do what they do and it explodes. I don't believe it's all about FB, Twitter, Chats etc, I think it's the person and their character. Again, just my opinion.

It sure can be!

It is not only FB, give Tagged a good look. Ready, willing and able to destroy relationships.