Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
So I drove to the beach with my youngest son and his friend from nextdoor in my topless Jeep. I love doing that when the Cali weather is warm and sunny. Anyway...
I'm driving to my favorite beach spots...looking at the surf and the beach for fun and cool stuff in the sun. I see a parking spot across the street (beachside) and make a U-turn to grab the spot. Well, well...parked two spots away is the infamous silver Ram truck that the OM drives. Wow! I've only seen pictures of this guy and once briefly in a bar 6 months ago kissing some young girl. But this time he was up close. He was with his 12 year old son. They were at the truck getting their surfboards out. So I pretended to be taking pictures of my son and his friend in my Jeep, but was really taking pictures of him/them.
When I had about a half dozen pics or so, I got in my Jeep and drove off. I couldn't help it, but I called my W with the news. She didn't think it was him until I sent her a picture of him. She got all flustered and told me to come home. I wanted to get in his face and introduce myself to the Bast___d. You see, he doesn't know I know about them. He thinks he/they got away with the A without the spouses knowing. But his son was with him and mine with me, so I did nothing. And apparently he didn't know who I was, so my W never showed him any pictures of me. Hmmmm.
For the rest of the day my W was apologizing for that. She said she/they wrecked my day and was very sorry. I really didn't, and still don't know how to react to what happened. This guy is a solid 9 if not a 10. Hawain, dark, buff, tatoos (my wife I thought hated tatoos), and all that. Granted he's only 5'-8" so I have one thing he doesn't - height. But everything else sucked!!
So now I'm in this funk and can't get out of it. Partially because my wife is now in a funk. I guess I blew it by saying anything and send her that picture. I hate it when I screw up like that.
What to do now?
I'm driving to my favorite beach spots...looking at the surf and the beach for fun and cool stuff in the sun. I see a parking spot across the street (beachside) and make a U-turn to grab the spot. Well, well...parked two spots away is the infamous silver Ram truck that the OM drives. Wow! I've only seen pictures of this guy and once briefly in a bar 6 months ago kissing some young girl. But this time he was up close. He was with his 12 year old son. They were at the truck getting their surfboards out. So I pretended to be taking pictures of my son and his friend in my Jeep, but was really taking pictures of him/them.
When I had about a half dozen pics or so, I got in my Jeep and drove off. I couldn't help it, but I called my W with the news. She didn't think it was him until I sent her a picture of him. She got all flustered and told me to come home. I wanted to get in his face and introduce myself to the Bast___d. You see, he doesn't know I know about them. He thinks he/they got away with the A without the spouses knowing. But his son was with him and mine with me, so I did nothing. And apparently he didn't know who I was, so my W never showed him any pictures of me. Hmmmm.
For the rest of the day my W was apologizing for that. She said she/they wrecked my day and was very sorry. I really didn't, and still don't know how to react to what happened. This guy is a solid 9 if not a 10. Hawain, dark, buff, tatoos (my wife I thought hated tatoos), and all that. Granted he's only 5'-8" so I have one thing he doesn't - height. But everything else sucked!!
So now I'm in this funk and can't get out of it. Partially because my wife is now in a funk. I guess I blew it by saying anything and send her that picture. I hate it when I screw up like that.
What to do now?
You say in it your wife cheated because you got fat?
Do you really believe that? If so, you're letting her off the hook.
Fact is, there is no excuse for infidelity.
You own the condition of the marriage when the infidelity took place. But she, and she alone, owns the decision to cheat.
If you are reconciling, there is a list of things that, IMO, you should demand of her to ensure her transparency. I hope you are taking those steps so that you can begin healing and rebuilding your marriage.
Are you guys in marriage counseling? If not, you probably should be.
I hate this game we're playing, so I gave up. If she's going to cheat AGAIN, then she's going to cheat. When I find out, I will just have to leave. Will I leave, I don't know. I'm sooooo struggling with all this still.
-TheRule
I felt like if she knew I wouldn't ask, she would have gotten in her car and screamed down to the beach to at least watch him surf. But since I knew he was there, she couldn't act on anything like; "I'm going to the gym for an hour or so!" Stuff like that.
I hate all this crap!!!!!
OM is a man that would be intimate with another man's wife. That is a scumbag in my opinion.
I am sure the surf rat works hard at his appearance and that is all he has!
Oh...BTW....you look young for your age and have a good head of hair.
Hugs
It is when you realize this that you can move forward.