Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
Tomorrow i will be married 9 years. Over the last year and a half i have sought other women outside my marriage. The first was a year in a half ago i had inappropriate text/ facebook messages with an old high school crush. Then about 8 months ago i met another woman and we went out 3 times. Never had sex, just held hands and kissed. Still not an excuse, it's still unfaithful. Then a few days ago i went back online and messaged a few women. I then realized i don't want to do this, it's not the person i want to be. All three times my wife found out one way or another. The last one was the last straw and I'm moving out. She said she can never trust me again, which i understand. I do want to be with her. How do i break this cycle? If not for when we get back together, then for the next person I'm with. My wife and i have been in counseling for the past 2 years, most of it dealing with this.
All your self worth comes from how others make you feel. Your focus on how you feel is more important than other people including your wife.
Your self worth should come from your character and integrity, which from your description is quite lacking.
The good thing is that you mentioned that this is not the type of person you want to be, which means you do want to be able to look yourself in the mirror and feel self worth rather than shame.
Admitting to yourself and your wife who you are is important to start. Personal counseling will be important to work through the origins of your poor self esteem and self focus. Another thing is to not focus on how you feel but rather on who you are and what kind of person you want to be going forward.
you clearly don't have that balls because deep inside, you don't want a backbone, you want an excuse
If you truly want to change get therapy and long term therapy to work on ur selfish and narcissistic traits. You need to learn what empathy is and practice self control.
If you had any empathy and had any clue the ibyensr pain u caused ur wife by doung this that should have made you want to change.
But do your wife a favor don't tell her you changed cause you didn't yet. Go in therapy wirk on urself become a better person. May be in the future you cross paths again. But let her go she deserves someone that treats her with empathy and respect. U can't untill you fix urself