For those of you who have been arround a while you know that i have been dealing with her Affair for a couple years and have had no progress really in the area of moving forward with it, however our communications skils had gotten better. Or so i thought. and those of you who have seen some of my replies to others have seen what has happened the last couple months. But to be short and simple, she is desperate and has been desperate for another child for a long time. Her mother and her have been trying to convince me that we need another child for several years. I dont want another, we dont have the time or money for another. Her mother has long told me that i will change my mind when it happens. Now a few months ago i come to find out that she has been doing ivf treatments and buying sperm from a cryobank trying to do this behind my back. She has no idea that i have pieced all this together. And in my communications wiht the clinic, they said that she can do this with out my concent if she put on the paperwork that she is single and unattached. And i know this is not the first time she has done this, arround the time of her affair with her ex, she did this as well.
Now while this is not really cheating, i have found i feel just like i did when i knew she was cheating on me. so all the feelings all over again.
She has resisted the idea of counseling since June. and a month ago i finally told her we need to go back to counseling, she told me she did not feel like we were getting anything accomplished and maybe a different counselor would help. So i found a different one and we have our first session on Saturay morning with her. And i know i have to confront her about what i know about this stuff. my question is how do i do it with out gettingthe whole its my fault i found out, and my fault i am hurt all over again?