Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
For those of you who have rebuilt your marriage after infidelity and betrayal, how did you do it? What did you do? What did they do? And for my own selfish benefit, I am really looking for the men who have survived their wife cheating on them. Is it worth it on the other end?
I am still in a bit of a fog. I caught her last Sunday. But every day I feel like I have to make the decision again of whether to work it out throughout the day, or to consider kicking her out of our home. We have 3 small kids. It's a tall order, but I could do it alone if I needed to. I have the support in the area and the job flexibility that would allow it. But I don't want that. Well, I suppose that depends on the moment cause sometimes I think that would just be so much easier, but more pain inflicted on my children.
At least by trying to work through it all, I can generall spare my children from the pain. They have no idea what is going on. But the pain I would see in their eyes and their hearts when I would have to tell them their mother abandoned us, is just too great. So instead, I guess I carry it all, even for both of us. I don't really see the pain on her side once she realized I wasn't kicking her out.
So enought rambling and getting to the point. Please share some success stories!!! I need to hear them!! I need to know that there is hope and that other people have done this and that it is worth it!! How did you do it?! At what point did you start to really feel the love from your spouse again? How long before you were intimate again? How long to forgive them? I know every story will be different, but I really need to hear them so please share!
Thank you!
Only if...
1. You both work at it
2. You both want to work at it
3. Honesty
4. Transparency
5. Spend time together... minimum 15 hours a week... it is doable if you really want this (funny how the busiest CS finds the time to cheat!)
Love?? I never stopped loving him.. I was disgusted and totally destroyed, but still loved him. I think if I felt we had a bad marriage it would have been different.
Sex: Hysterical Bonding helped me cope... some people say it dies off and it’s back to what you were doing before... NOT IN OUR CASE!
Sit down and agree to Ask and Answer All Questions ... give a time limit.. I told him I was going to ask questions for 2 weeks and he had to answer them. He did! Then we moved forward not back!
Good Luck
Married 29 years
D-day 10-28-14
Hysterical bonding: http://www.businessinsider.com/hysterical-bonding-after-breakup-2017-11
Pick me dancing: https://www.huffingtonpost.com/tracy-schorn/the-humiliating-dance-of-_b_2330929.html
In a marriage there are a few strings that bond you including your vows/marriage status, emotional closeness, physical closeness, and love.
When you find out they have been betraying you, pretty much all of those chords are cut. The easiest thing to reattach is physical closeness even is there is a void of emotional closeness.
It's like freefalling from a top of a tree. You will desperately grab on to anything to avoid hitting the ground.
As you regain some love, emotional closeness, and healing.....you aren't as desperate to find something to keep you together. Children actually help a lot as you are still co parents.