You are dealing with it as you need to. While i do not belive in pshycics, i do value that they can be a form of talk therapy for you. In the end it is only money, it cannot go iwth you when you die, but to know when you have gone overboard is something you need to evaluate on your own.
But i would encourage you to talk to your H. It could be a good thing for you to tell him you need some one ti give you that pick me up.

Don't beat up yourself over this.
It was a phase during extreme emotional duress.

I don't even want to think about how much money I spent on alcohol the first year after DD. And how do I put a price on lost time w/ my kids,friends, and family? I totally shut down and didn't engage w/ anyone during this dark time. If I had a bill in my hand , like you do.... it would prob be pretty high. We all cope differently and many times destructively. It sucks, but there it is. I'm glad you posted this.

OMG (OH MY GOD). I did the same thing. Although i did not spend as much as you did. Wow that was crazy money spent but what is done is done. However, when my ex first left me i wanted to talk to somebody that would tell me something so i turned to them too. OMG they are soooo phoney. they will tell you what they think you want to hear. How many of them said he will come back to you. Yea right; bull crap he never came back. He divorced me that's what he did. LOL i laugh now but i didnt then. You could really get caught up in that stuff if you are not careful. It's like an addiction; like gambling. So keep away from them. Take yourself on trips do a makeover and if you need to talk hey i am here and its absolutely free. Be strong. You can do this cause i DID.

Again wow, I can't believe that once again I am not alone on my coping mechanism of reaching out in an odd way.

I think it's better than spending my money on drugs or sexual acts but who am I to judge to be honest, I could see several coping mechanisms to just trying to get through another day.

I feel so much more relieved and I'm happy to report its been five days of no psychic consulting.

My biggest dillema now is changing my life. That's sounds drastic. Here is my boat: Sitting with Dad in hospital during his chemo while dreading a talk with my H face to face this weekend about the next step in our separation and changing our living arrangements. I asked for his undivided attention to discuss these changes. I'm not ready to say divorce I'm ready to say get out of my life while she is in yours. I am suggesting he move out of our marital home and in with her or to make a schedule at our house where we are not there together. Is this insane? I know it's in my best interests not to divorce until January but I can't do this during the holidays so I think more needs to change. I was told with his was issues and the emotional abuse this is causing I could get a protection order to keep him from the house but don't you think that's drastic? Be honest. I need some advice on what to do. I don't want things to stay the same I just don't know how to change them or where to start.

After reading your posts the first thing that jumps out at me is that you are still in some level of denial. If your husband is getting the same message that you are putting out here, he should be thinking that its OK for him to be screwing around, and that you'll be there when he's tired of it. This is a self respect issue for you.

Do you really think that the holidays, which are three months away, will be better if you two are hanging on by your finger nails? You two need to s**t or get off the pot. Respectfully, you need to pull your head out of the sand.

Thanks Lance for the honesty and you are right. I guess I'm ready for change but not ready to file papers, does that make sense? I'm ready for a separation where he is not apart of my life but not ready for divorce.

Is that still having my head in the sand? Though?

Its not delusional if both of you agree on a trial separation for the purpose of being apart, not for the purpose of trying to find someone better.

Do you want to be what Bruce Springsteen sang about when he said "...you ain't a beauty but hey you're alright"?

Unless you two are legally separated, he's an adulterer.

I know that you have a pile on your plate with your father sick and all, and you may not be making decisions that you might otherwise make. In the end you'll have made the best decision you could at the time.

I have nothing but well wishes for you.

I spent a considerable amount of money at Macy's buying new cloths to help comfort me. It did nothing to help. My wife likes them though. We do stupid things to try and comfort ourselves or get answers. Exercise and time to myself seems to help. Believe it or not early on in this nightmare, I thought about looking into seeing a hypnotist to see if he can erase everything about this A. Crazy.. Hang in there.