Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
Consequences
This is just throwing out a question to folks what should be the consequences for someone cheating on someone lets start with someone married or single/ with kids.
My STBX saw firsthand - when her father cheated on her mother that she her mother did NOTHING. She put up with it for 3 years then my STBX kicked her father out of the house and her mother then cried and prayed and didnt eat for the next 3 years couldnt work etc. Basically waited around for him to come back which after an additional 3 years of fun sin time he did because he ran out of money and mistress left him.
That didnt teach my STBX or her sisters anything either then you take it. You cheat and the other person will just sit around and wait for you dumb ass.
I think if her mother would have been a lot stronger and moved on and taught her daughters better lessons in handling the situation either then crying and not eating that they would have been stronger women and learned how not to behave because there are consequences.
What should be the consequences of cheating and I know it varies if when caught - if the CS is remorseful etc.
This is just throwing out a question to folks what should be the consequences for someone cheating on someone lets start with someone married or single/ with kids.
My STBX saw firsthand - when her father cheated on her mother that she her mother did NOTHING. She put up with it for 3 years then my STBX kicked her father out of the house and her mother then cried and prayed and didnt eat for the next 3 years couldnt work etc. Basically waited around for him to come back which after an additional 3 years of fun sin time he did because he ran out of money and mistress left him.
That didnt teach my STBX or her sisters anything either then you take it. You cheat and the other person will just sit around and wait for you dumb ass.
I think if her mother would have been a lot stronger and moved on and taught her daughters better lessons in handling the situation either then crying and not eating that they would have been stronger women and learned how not to behave because there are consequences.
What should be the consequences of cheating and I know it varies if when caught - if the CS is remorseful etc.
It needs to be something significant. Preferably, something painful.
I made my cheating bastard give up some activities he really enjoys.
SHE joined in with him. Twice the fun for him! But now - no more!
I think that doing things for the wounded spouse. . . like planning a trip together, or fulfilling some dream would be good.
My mother made my cheating father buy her a luxury car and travel, travel, travel.
Your poor stbx mother-in-law. She didn't have the strength, support, and maybe financial stability she needed. My mother was
financially independent, so it was easier for her to toss my father
out on his ass. It was still horribly painful and I think, led to an illness that soon killed her.
These cheater are so selfish! So blind to the damage they cause.
One other thought. I'm definitely learning that childhood pain works the opposite of how you would expect. I don't know why but kids who see bad things happen seem more likely to do them themselves later in life than to learn to do the opposite. I think that's what the Bible means when it talks about "sins of the father being visited on the sons for 7 generations" - it's not God punishing people, it's bad behavior creating a rut that the family tends to follow for generations to come before they can escape it.
just personal experiences.
Let's start with a cheating spouse who is never "caught". The consequences, depending upon the personality of the cheater, may be minimal or none. Believe it or not, not every cheater is remorseful. They don't all struggle with guilt. Some people have no conscience.
Once detected, consequences run the gamut: loss of trust, loss of respect, loss of friendships, loss of reputation, loss of family, and sometimes even lost careers and financial damage.
I agree, though, that the worst consequence with most is the realization of what they've done.
Without that your just bobbing around from one crazy experience to get your highs off of to another. Never learning repeating past stupid experiences hurting yourself and others around you.
He says he didn't want a divorce but he wasn't grown up enough to admit what he had done. He lied and cheated some more and it has cost both of us.
He wasn't remorseful at all.
I divorced my EX years ago, but he still deals with the consequences. His kids don't have much to do with him and that's sad. His own family has no respect for him and his wife/the OW/we call her Spammy. (the imitation meat that she is...snort laugh). We live in a small town and there is no one that does not know about him and what he did with her.
The town thinks they are shit.
It's been years and this is ongoing for him. ...and that was his choice.
So be it.
L~