You day "my wife" not your ex so I am assuming then that toy are still together. If so then, "sane interactions about the kids when we have to" doesn't sound very good. What is your back story? Have you been rebuilding your marriage or are you divorcing?

I have always been disgusted by cheating but for me I'm probably a bit more understanding now because of what I have been through.

The funny thing is i just created a post on the rebuilding page that's sorta similar but about random couples in public. I think having emotions towards cheaters is normal and I also think taking it to a personal level is normal.

I would say I go through phases though. When my marriage is hitting bumps and I'm triggered to those early times after dday, cheaters piss me off more and when my marriage is on an upswing I feel more empathy because I know that chances are, their marriage is in the crapper and one this A is caught, there will be enough tears and pain to last a long time.

I have never been tolerant about cheating. My H is in law enforcement and I have friends that are wives. When I found out about their CS's I let them know. I warned them .. I told them I didn't see anything but they better investigate. Not one person warned me.. I stumbled upon these A's. I wish other people had the same morals.

no we are not together but not fully divorced yet so she is an almost ex

My father cheated on my mother when I was 13 and i saw the whoel thing unfold. They made it, amazingly but it set the tone for how I viewed cheating to this day.

It is a despicable thing but we humans do a lot of despicable things and we see them every day... pretty sad.

I am with you. It's disgusting what people make a choice to do to their families. It's not funny to destroy those "they" claim to love,is it?
I'm sorry you are going through this. Tears and pain do last a lifetime and then you move on. Most cheaters are insecure people who need a lot of attention. It's a shame they don't turn to the person closest to them for that attention. Good luck to you.

I have a friend at work who has been commenting about people who go on websites and meet up with others just for sex, as well as the ones where married people just blatantly post like they are on a dating for singles site, only they say they are just looking for fun on the side. My gosh, what has this world come to. At least it all used to be sort of hush-hush. Our society almost condones it now. Thank goodness I was raised with a few scruples, and hopefully am passing them on to my kids. I am so sorry for what you are going through, and completely understand your feelings of not wanting to hear about all of the debauchery that goes on. Hang in there, thankfully for all the nastiness out there, there are still a lot of great people too.. try to put yourself in a position to socialize with the better half.