Infertility Support Group

In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.

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shannon1234 03/12/2011

Rather than write journals on here I have been using my blog as a journal. I hope people don't mind if I share those here. This infertility thing is such a roller coaster, some days are better than others.

Lately I feel like I've been making peace with my predicament and feel myself moving toward being ready to move into the adoption/fostering realm. My husband isn't ready yet, so it's not time. Yet, I feel a stronger and stronger pull in that direction. It's like I'm reframing what this infertility thing is all about.

Just wondering if anyone else feels this way. When it is time to let go and move on I wonder?

www.infertilityawakening.com
Infertility in a World of Disposability: The Chosen Ones?
"
. . . . sometimes I wonder if those children dont have special guardian angels watching over them. And lately I catch myself wondering if those same guardian angels are the very ones who swoop down and block our tubes, send our hormones to Mars, or leave our husbands with subpar swimmers. . . ."

deleted_user 03/12/2011

I understand how you feel. My husband and I are going to try on more round of IVF, with donor eggs this time. If that doesn't work, we are both very open to adoption. I also wonder if there's a child already out there that's supposed to be ours. I wish you the best!!

deleted_user 03/12/2011

Speaking as someone who just 7 weeks ago adopted a 4 year old girl, I firmly believe it was meant to be and she was waiting for us, just as we were waiting for her. We have been married for 13 years this summer and conceived once, in November of 2009. I lost the baby last January. We were beyond devastated. It took me pretty much all of 2010 to recover, which you never completely do. But, at the end of last year my husband's cousin FINALLY agreed to give her daughter up. She had her when she was 16 and has been battling drug/alcohol addiction since she was 13. Our daughter, Bella, was not well cared for to say the least. When I get sad about my lost little angel, I remember that I would not have Bella, and she would not have us. The three of us were meant to be, and we could not love each other more!! Now I realize that God does have a plan, and we just needed to be patient and trust in Him.

I wish you all the best. Xoxo Kellie

shannon1234 03/12/2011

Kelli,

I am not usually someone who tears up unexpectedly. However, when I read your post I had goosebumps from head to toe (in 86 degree weather) and I have to admit that my eyes welled up. What a beautiful, beautiful happy ending for all three of you. It's stories like your that give me hope, and belief, in some higher meaning to this all. I know there are so many beautiful children who just need to be loved.

Thank you and all the best to your newly formed family!

shannon1234 03/12/2011

Lucy,
I wish you the best as well. May this next round be the last one for you, with a new life on its way!

I do have this feeling deep down that the right baby will find its way to us at the right time--genetically ours or not.

deleted_user 03/12/2011

We are considering adoption as well. We are going to try a couple more rounds of IUI's first, and if that doesnt work out- then we are turning to adoption. But adoption is no easy road either. We already started looking into it and it is a LOT! Good luck to you and God will lead us all in the right direction!

duane 03/13/2011

I definitely know how you feel. We completed our homestudy last year and have been waiting for our forever family since! we have had two interviews since then...one for a private adoption and the other was for a CAS child. Unfortunately we were not chosen! we are still waiting for our international adoption, however we found out that India (country we chose) is undergoing their own infertility crisis, so healthy infants and toddlers are being adopted in country than internationally! the wait time has now increased to 4-7 years! China's wait time is longer and other countries are now doing relative adoptions only! I am finding that adoption is like IF...waiting, praying, hoping then a BFN...Do not despair, your forever child is out there. How and when it will happen will make the years of waiting go away!

shannon1234 03/14/2011

duane, thank you for sharing your experience. My goodness, I had no idea that it could take so very long. It's hard to understand, especially internationally. After having volunteered in orphanages in China, and seeing room, upon room, upon room of children who needed homes. They did tell us however that even though there are so many children, the country makes it very hard for people to adopt. So ridiculously unfortunate.

I wish you all the best and am hoping you will soon have news that your child has arrived!

mgobluegrad 03/14/2011

We have gone through one fresh cycle that resulted in twins that I miscarried around 9 weeks. We had a good number frozen, so we had our first FET in November. Fortunately one of the three "took" so I am 19 weeks with a singleton. With only three frozen embryos left (we lost three at thaw), we know that the odds are against us for baby #2 (assuming all continues to go well with this one). We plan to adopt internationally once this one is a few years old to complete our family. We don't want to spend that kind of money once again not to mention going through the hell of IVF without a guarantee at the end of the day. Besides, I know of quite a few people who adopted and then mysteriously got pregnant on their own afterwards for a bonus baby! Good luck to you.

shannon1234 03/14/2011

Congratulations mgobluegrad! All the best to you with your new little one on the way, and for the future ones to come, however they arrive.

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