Welcome to DS, it is great site full of amazing women!! I would suggest, even though you are scared, that you go to see a doctor who deals with infertility, or talk to your current DR about your concerns and maybe get a referral. You may find out that you only need a little extra help (like fertility drugs) to get pregnant, or if not, there are a series of test that you and your husband can take to start to rule out or figure out what may be the problem. In my opinion it is always best to know what the problem is, so you can deal with it. So sorry you have to go through this, I know it is hard.

Mendolve is right. Its good to be informed. Then u can get assistance with the issue.

Hi tamills0508

Welcome to the group! I've been here since 2/7, so I'm a vet by now. Hehehe!

Don't put off going to the doc-- the "not knowing" I would imagine is scarier than what they might tell you (at least it would be for me; but easier said than done, I know!) Looking back on my experience, and what my Ob/Gyn's have told me-- it would not hurt to get a "pre-concpetion check-up".

Very important is to have your spouse also get a pre-conception check-up.

I can definitely recommend the following books:

"Fully Fertile"
"Making Babies"
"Taking Charge of Your Fertility"
"The Conception Chronicles"
"Swimming In Circles"

Best wishes!

Hi sweetie, welcome! I agree 100% with mendolove. I understand your apprehension but getting answers really can be more liberating than spinning your wheels. The sooner the better too, in my opinion. It could be a very simple thing or it could be more complicated but once you know then you can move forward. I wish you the best and want to encourage you to be brave! :) :)

Welcome

Hello and welcome! I agree with both previous replies. My husband and I have been married 3 years this summer and have been having unprotected sex our entire marriage. We started ttc in January 2011, and have recently started to see a fertility specialist. I think back to all the tears we could've saved if we saught help sooner. I know that coming to terms with the fact that you're struggling to get pregnant can be scary. I've been there and know how that feels. Don't freak out too badly, there are many causes (and treatments) available to those who are ttc. Seeking the assistance of a specialist is probably a great start! Good luck!

Do you plan on having an ob/gyn deliver the baby when you become pregnant? If so, I would suggest going for your annual exam and bring up the topic. You don't have to agree with whatever the findings are but, at least you could form a better opinion about what NOW you want to do. It also doesn't hurt to check out the doctor so that you can know if this is the office you want to go through your baby experience with.

How do you track your fertility?

I had unprotected sex with the father of my six children our whole 20 years together. We used my natural fertility to obtain pregnancy. My biggest fear was becoming pregnant when I didn't want to be. It never happened. I only ever did get pregnant once I understood when I was ovulating. Once I knew that, we never missed.

Energetically speaking, there was more that went into the equation of making baby than sex and knowing my fertility. I hope this helps.

Your body is very wise, it is your greatest asset in the art of spoken without words communication. Maybe your baby making experience is simply honing your skills at becoming the kind of mother you want to be. One who knows how to hear what is being spoken beyond words. Best to you.

Welcome- I too have just joined DS, and love it. I can write what ever I want and no ones really "knows" me other than on here. The best is that we all understand what everyone else is going through, in one way or another. It is a great stress reliever, and we all say whats on our minds.
As far as making an apt with your doc- DO IT!! Dont keep putting it off, it is scary to think of what they could tell you, but what if you wait and find out that if you had come in sooner there may have been a better outcome?? In my opinion the later is worse than the first. I am an RN so this is even harder in some ways because I understand so much because of my schooling. Call and make the apt, have you husband go with you to everything they have you do. That way you both hear what they have to say and can both ask questions. My hubby and I very often find that the other thinks of questions that the other one wouldnt, it really helps. Remember we are ALL here to support one another though everything ;')

I was the same as you before I started my IF journey. It is extremely terrifying going into it but Mendolove is right...it's best to find out for sure. I'm glad I went when I did, even though I got bad news...I just want this journey over with & the sooner I get things done the sooner I get to have my baby.

The fear of not knowing is so much worse than the diagnosis! After a couple of years of trying and feeling like a failure, we found out that my husband has an extremely low sperm count and low motility. So low, that IUI is not an option and that we have to do IVF/ICSI. Even with this knowledge, I feel better because I am finally know what's going on. We are saving money and hope to have our first IVF cycle sometime after we relocate in June. Trust me, knowledge is power (as cheesy as that sounds)!!

I put off going to the doctor for almost two years because I was so worried after I was first diagnosed with PCOS. To my surprise when I went I was informed that not only did everything look normal and fine but that the folicles on my ovaries were not even a lot or very large. A weight of worry was lifted off my shoulders. He did tell me though that I wouldnt know about infertility until I started trying. My husband and I have been trying on and off for 6 months now but now we really want to try. I will be asking my gyno about Clomid and what he thinks I should do to get pregnant because my husband and I really want to have kids. You are still young like me so its better to go now and find out if anything may be wrong to prevent further complications. Ive seen way too many women (my 40yr old cousin included) beating themselves with pills, shots and treatments trying to become pregnant.

Knowledge is power!

I'm 30 now and started our "journey" in May 08.
We now have a 1 year old daughter.

I had a few miscarriages, then my diagnosis, which was extreme by anyones measure. And onto IVF with the only useful tool for us, arrayCGH (highlytechnical stuff, hope you never need know what it is!).

The things I would say to you is these;
All the anguish, greif and pain of the "journey" melts when you resolve your decisions, regardless of how you come to that resolve.
All the time condences into a blip of nothingness once you're there too.

At times for me a mere day was an unbearabe torture to wait, seemingly never going to get beyond the moment.
And at other times a 3minute phonecall was a life-changing event..even if I'd had to wait over3 hours of eternity to recieve that call.

Keeping a perspective on times passing is a great tool to keep the sanity.