We are worried we will have to use donor sperm as well. I know how you feel.....you want ivf to work but it's bittersweet that it won't be biologically with your husband. I'm sure that creates a whole host of other issues.....Do you tell your family or not? Will it sting when they say "Oh it looks so much like your husband" (when you know that's not true.)......My husband also doesn't mind. We have two children we adopted so he already knows he will love the baby conceived by donor just the same. It's me that struggles with this thought and after months of concideration decided to not do it (it would have saved us a lot of $$). Maybe after a few failed IVFs I would change my mind. I just feel like our marriage has been through soooooo sooo much already I don't want to add any more emotional issues to it. Best wishes for what you chose. It's a personal choice and you know what will be best for you.

I haven't done IVF, but we are using donor sperm as we are lesbians and have none..lol
We are currently using a family member as a donor, but we have gone through sperm banks and using a private donor. I understand that we are in different circumstances, but I have friends on here that are married and due to male factor IF have used sperm donors and had success.
Please know that just because you have to use donor sperm, your child will be no less your husbands child. My child will me my child and my wife's child. I understnad wanting both of your genentics involved, but the reality is that the way a child is raised is very powerful and genes aren't the most importnant thing.
If you have any further questions, feel free to message me. Iwill help however I can.
Good luck with whatever you decide :)

My DH and I have had to use donor sperm too. He has azoospermia which means he doesn't create sperm. Once we found out he was ok with using donor sperm because he didn't want me to never have the pregnancy experience. It was an awkward day when we picked our donor from our list but we were both happy with our choice. We chose to go through a smaller sperm bank that our RE recommened. We have done 2 IUI's with the ds, 1st IUI I got a BFP but it was ectopic and I needed surgery to save my tube and IUI #2 was a BFN. We are planning on trying for #3 when my DH is back from his deployment to Afghanistan. Good luck!!

I have not used donor sperm, so I can't help with advice much. But this makes me think of another post where someone was considering adoption, and they said that they decided they wanted to have a family together, and they were going to do what was necessary to make that happen. Obviously adoption is a very different situation, but the child would still be yours too. Even if your DH's sperm isn't what concieved your child, it was his love and nurturing that brought that child here. He will always be Dad to your child. As far as IUI vs. IVF I would guess the RE would have you try some IUI's first. But, the cost of donor sperm and some IUIs could very well equal close to an IVF, with higher success rates. That would be a decision made between you and DH nd your RE. Good luck and hope the answers come to you soon!!

Thanks ladies. This helps...I am coming to terms and hubby and I know this is the right choice for us.

My DH and I are using donor sperm. It took a Very Long time to come to the decision as it is not one to take lightly. My final moment was when my DH said that the day we married, he considered us ONE. If we can have a child that is biologically mine but not his, it would not matter since we are already one person, making our child 100% OURS!
I go for my Beta on Friday for our IUI #3 - I have to be honest and say that I still have worries that our child will resent us some day or that we find out in later years that the Donor Guy became a weirdo that has too many donor kids... BUT I come back to reality and remember that OUR child will be loved unconditionally and OUR child will be taught that a family is love, not genetics.
This is a very personal decision and I am excited for you to take the next steps to discuss. Good Luck and you will have support in whichever choice you and your DH make for YOUR family!

It's something people have asked me about, but something I've had a hard time broaching to my DH. I think it's got to be a really difficult conversation to have. Right now, we're doing IVF with his sperm (which have low motility, but morphologically they are fine) and my eggs. Maybe we'll cross that bridge one day, but right now, we're going with what we have.