Infertility Support Group
In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.
Hi all.......
I joined the forum earlier today in hopes of getting some clarity and maybe feel a little more normal about being 32 and not having a child. So long story short i got married in 2006, and we starting TTC in june 2007, June 2008 my OB-GYNE says the one word nobody ever wants to hear "infertility". We both got tested, and my body doesnt produce enough of the right hormones to sustain a pregnancy so even if i were to get preg, the baby would likely be flushed out... So Jan 2009 I had a HSG test, it came back normal, March 2009 I had surguery, and in May 2009 we begin seeing a RE..... for months we went thru this process, and each IUI cycle failed. The stress alone was enough to make me not want toget out of the bed. I felt like less than a woman not being ableto bring life into the world when i see young girls, drug addicts, and party girls popping out babies like its not big deal.... everytime i hear a woman say she didnt want to get preggo or wasnt tryna have another baby i just want to smack her! I still was hoping, praying, and believing God that one day soon it would be a BFP on the stick.....
Anyway, im recently divorced now, And while im not actively trying to get pregnant, i still hope that it happens whenever there is a little chance you know. I feel like im stuck in the middle. Im not actually trying to get pregnant, but i still feel that pain of knowing iit didnt happen and may never happen. People always ask "what are you waiting for?" "You arent getting any younger!" as if i dont know this!!!!! If it was my way I would have my son/daughter in my arms!!!!!!!!!!
Im tired of feeling like a failure because i cant have a child. Im tired of crying, and hurting and looking at other women wishing it was me pregnant, holding an infant, pushing my toddler on a swing.
Additionally, Im wondering who will want to be with the barren woman?!?!?!?!? At what point to i tell a potential mate that this is a potential problem still??
I know im in a different space than most of you are, but im hoping that I will find the support i need. IT still hurts, badly......
I joined the forum earlier today in hopes of getting some clarity and maybe feel a little more normal about being 32 and not having a child. So long story short i got married in 2006, and we starting TTC in june 2007, June 2008 my OB-GYNE says the one word nobody ever wants to hear "infertility". We both got tested, and my body doesnt produce enough of the right hormones to sustain a pregnancy so even if i were to get preg, the baby would likely be flushed out... So Jan 2009 I had a HSG test, it came back normal, March 2009 I had surguery, and in May 2009 we begin seeing a RE..... for months we went thru this process, and each IUI cycle failed. The stress alone was enough to make me not want toget out of the bed. I felt like less than a woman not being ableto bring life into the world when i see young girls, drug addicts, and party girls popping out babies like its not big deal.... everytime i hear a woman say she didnt want to get preggo or wasnt tryna have another baby i just want to smack her! I still was hoping, praying, and believing God that one day soon it would be a BFP on the stick.....
Anyway, im recently divorced now, And while im not actively trying to get pregnant, i still hope that it happens whenever there is a little chance you know. I feel like im stuck in the middle. Im not actually trying to get pregnant, but i still feel that pain of knowing iit didnt happen and may never happen. People always ask "what are you waiting for?" "You arent getting any younger!" as if i dont know this!!!!! If it was my way I would have my son/daughter in my arms!!!!!!!!!!
Im tired of feeling like a failure because i cant have a child. Im tired of crying, and hurting and looking at other women wishing it was me pregnant, holding an infant, pushing my toddler on a swing.
Additionally, Im wondering who will want to be with the barren woman?!?!?!?!? At what point to i tell a potential mate that this is a potential problem still??
I know im in a different space than most of you are, but im hoping that I will find the support i need. IT still hurts, badly......
I've been married since 2006, so I see the frustration in having to wait so long. Sorry things didn't work out with your marriage, but you don't need a guy like that. We all deserve the best when dealing with infertility in our lives.
I have a sister who was also got married in 2006. She is 34 and still doesn't have any kids. I have a cousin and his wife who couldn't have children, so they adopted one. I have another cousin who struggled to get pregnant and then eventually had a little boy, but then her husband died just before their son's 2nd birthday. My sister's husband has a cousin who spent 8 years trying to get pregnant and finally did, and I think she has two boys now. And then I have a cousin who got married, had twins with his wife, and things didn't work out between them... so he ended up getting divorced and marrying someone else, and they have 5 or 6 kids together. I have a few coworkers who are older (upper 20s or in their 30s) who have never been married and it doesn't seem like they're going to get married any time soon.
The Lord really does have a plan for each and every one of us! It just seems like so many people have it so easy--having the perfect marriage and being able to get pregnant so easily--but there are SO many people out there who struggle. That's why I love DailyStrength so much. It's a place that brings us all together so that we can help ease some of the burden, heartache, and frustration that we are all facing.
Good luck in your endeavors! Always strive to have a positive attitude. I know that can be hard, but it sure makes life more enjoyable. And be sure to take the advice of the other ladies here! If you have any questions or if you need advice or help through the hard times, just know that you can come here to get comfort. Even though we may not personally know each other, we are all your friends! :-)
At 32, you are young. (I'll be 36 in January - and I feel like my clock is ticking LOUDLY after 2 years of ttc.) And, as others have said, you are so much more than your ability to reproduce. Clearly, you are a strong woman who can withstand difficult times.
Sucks when the good ones struggle, like we do. Know that I can relate. I've gone through many, many similar feelings. You'll never be alone here.
They don't know or didn't tell me why I don't produce progesterone, so I was taking that for a while and would have had to stay on it thru 1st trimester at least once I did get preg....
Overall I try to be a positive person, and I do thank God for my life daily, for a job I love, and a house that is mine. I'm never hungry, bills are paid etc etc but I have these moments where the sadness is so much it's almost consuming. As a little girl people always said when ur a grown up and u get married u will have babies. S I did that but no babies came.now I'm working on reprogramming that mindset. It's hard to undo years of believing one thing to see something else.
I kno I don't want to be a single parent so if get married again, I would consider private adoption in a heartbeat. My ex husband became emotionally abusive especially when it came to IF issues. Kinda went from Dr. Jehykl to Mr. Hyde.......