I just overheard a girl at work tell someone's she's expecting. I had to put my headphones in and I haven't stopped crying since. :(

I am so sorry- that is the worst! Last year a girl that I worked with got pregnant "on accident" and it was really hard to watch her go through the stages of pregnancy. Not only did I wish I could get pregnant that easily, but it also made me feel like a jerk because it was hard to be happy for her- I know it is awful to say, but those were my honest feelings. You have definitely come to the right place to find others who feel like you do. The activity on DS goes up and down, but it is very helpful to read through old posts and people's journals- just knowing that I was not alone was one of the most comforting things in the world and helped me work through some rough times. Nothing about infertility is fair, but we somehow have to accept that this is the road we are on and have to figure out a way to get what we so desperately want. I am wishing the best for you :)

Gosh I feel so bad for you right now. I agree with blbnf..nothing about infertility is fair. I am so sorry that you had to go through that. You are in the right place here. Nobody judges you especially if you have uncharitable thoughts..trust me I have had plenty! I hope that you can find some peace. Sending big hugs your way

I'm so sorry - in the beginning before we decided to see some Dr's, my cycles would be up and down..and when it went into day 30, day 34 i would think of fun ways to tell my parents who i know would be over the moon...even thinking of flying in to surprise them with the news. Then when my period arrived, it would be like the world fell out from under me. Now, i practically don't let myself hope - i just automatically assume that it's going to come b/c thats been the route for 6+ years. In fact to "prove to myself" that it will come, i purposely take a pregnancy test (and maybe for those 3 minutes i think "what if..." but then i force myself back down to earth) just to show myself that i shouldn't hope. It probably sounds weird to everyone else, but that just works for me.

I hope that you find some comfort here. Sending you thoughts and hugs.

Hey, I'm new here too. I just found out that the friend I started trying to get pregnant at the same time as is pregnant with her 2nd. Her other son is 3 years old. :(

I'm sorry you feel so sad right now, I definitely know how that goes (without all the tests and meds though). My husband has been putting off his semen analysis for 4 months now, I think he's scared it is his fault.

I hope you are feeling a little better!

Thanks ladies! I am in a much better place today. I have decided to seek a second opinion. Most people on this site know more about their situation than I do. DH samples have been great. I have had an HSG and bloodwork once shortly after ovulation. How do they even know I have good eggs or even any eggs? I called this morning and my appointment is July to go thru it with another doctor. Until then I keep moving with my clomid IUIs and maybe injections in June. I actually have hope today and I thank you for that.

Hi, dear hopeful! I've just come across your thread and was so disappointed I didn't see it earlier.. There was a need for a soothing word at least in your post. And your line : "I allowed myself to hope" was absolutely heartbreaking and reminded me myself a year ago.
On the other hand, coming closer to your last update I'm so happy you've decided to switch the docs. I believe this is more than good to have 2nd opinion. From what they say you're both extremely fine but you cannot conceive for no reason!? It's really weird. Docs usually name such a case unexplained infertility at least and investigate the matter further. In your case your doc seems just not to be bothered much with what is going on with you. I'm sorry if I sound harsh but I'm so frustrated when experts whom we believe and trust do such a tiny thing and not their best.. So, my brave lady, I truly think you're on the right way. And your new doc will find out what's wrong and everything as for the quality of your eggs. I'll be thinking of you and with you all the best x
PS. We've just passed DE IVF in Ukrainian Biotexcom clinic.

Update and reply to Heretochat...

Thank you for your kind words. I read somewhere that when you are struggling with infertility that you go thru the five stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance) every single month. For the most part I agree with that.

Last week I got all of my paperwork ready and turned in for my second opinion in July. I got lucky and they happened to have someone call in to reschedule while I was dropping it off so they got me in last Thursday. They literally spent three hours with me. I did my first ever ultrasound. At CD10 I had 21 visible follicles and three that were measuring really well. I'm excited because it means that I have eggs but I'm bummed because it means I'm still unexplained.

They told me they are slightly concerned that my cervix hasn't opened naturally for my past two IUIs so they want me to come to them for my next so they can see what's going on. My ultrasound also showed some discoloration that I need to ask about. They also ordered some tests to check my thyroid. DH is grumbling because his work schedule is tougher this week so it will be harder for him to do his part. I'm trying to mentally prepare for another painful IUI and the possibility of injecting myself next month. It's crazy what we do for a chance at what some people have so easily.

I talked to my aunt yesterday about this. She told me to just relax and it'll happen when I'm not so stressed about it. It made me appreciate this group a little more. I need people who understand what I'm going thru.

Hi everyone. I also just joined this group. I have been feeling like I can't deal with this one my own anymore and need support from people that understand so I was so relieved to hear some stories that sound so similar to ours and feel like there are people who truly get it. I also have been feeling VERY bummed lately. We have been trying for 2 years officially in June. I am 33 and my husband is 30. We tried our first round of IVF in February and got a BFN. We still have 2 embabies left frozen and just had our first follow up since our failed cycle because I honestly couldn't face going back in there! I went through my first cycle with a very good friend of mine. We actually implanted 2 days apart and found out our results on the same day and she was pregnant and we weren't!! It was devastating. It seems like everywhere I turn everyone is pregnant. I had to get off Facebook about 1.5 months ago because I just couldn't take it anymore. Now the doctor informed me that although we have yet to find anything wrong with me, they still want me to do a biopsy of the endometrium and do IM shots on this cycle which I did not do last cycle opting instead for patches, pills, and suppositories. I'm mostly in this for the support and I would love to share any knowledge I have gained so far along my journey. Hopeful479, I totally feel your pain and I am with you my stressed out and frustrated sister! Vent away please and help me realize that I am not alone in this lonely journey. Baby dust to all!!!

Anxiously...

Welcome! I've only been in the group two weeks but these ladies are awesome. It really helps to know we are not alone and that there are people who really understand where we are. I am sorry to hear about your ivf. I was devastated after my last Iui failed but here I am, two weeks later, trying again. DH is getting a little tired of using a cup and finding time away from work to collect. I sometimes forget how hard it must be on him too. Please keep us posted on your journey. We are all in this together.

Hello!! I'm also new to the group. This was actually my husband's idea to join a group. We've been trying going on 8 years. We've never done IVF, because we don't want to spend the money on a maybe. We've also done 3 IUI's. I'm just in a funk about everything right now, because like everyone else, some one you know is getting pregnant. Always the brides maid, never the bride. I've done every test possible and so has my husband. We are both perfectly healthy, with no actual reason as to why we can't get pregnant. Our doctor told us that 5% of healthy couples cannot get pregnant, with no known reason. So now we have the option of IVF or adoption. I am scared of adoption, because you always hear the stories of people adopting and they get pregnant. I feel if we adopt we'll get pregnant, and I won't love the adopted child as much as my own. And I don't want to put a child through that emotional distress. I just don't know where to go from here. I just turned 33, so I know that I'm almost out of time. Another thing is I live in Nashville and all the adoption agencies that I've looked into ask that you have a reference from a pastor, preacher, etc...., but my husband and I are not religious at all. I just feel like I'm out of options. I'm sorry if I seem negative about all this, but trying this long and no results id very frustrating.

cobbler83,

Have you done a injection/iui cycle? I find it interesting that you've only done three IUIs. Did they really give up after that? My plan is three with Clomid and then I move to a clomid/injection/IUI combo. Do you want to share a little about what you've tried? Also I'm 33. We are not out of time. Before this started I would joke that it needed to happen soon or I was going to be at risk of breaking a hip in labor. My SIL is our age and she's still planning on having more kids. There are also a lot of women in this forum who are older than us. I am still hoping this works and I can have more than one (getting greedy, I know). Hang in there. We have time left; I promise!

hopeful479,

When we did the IUI's, I did take injections and Clomid. But yes after 3 times they said it was time to move onto the next step, seeing nothing worked.

Hi everyone, I hope everyone was able to get passed Sunday... On Friday i had a really hard time b/c i knew what Sunday was, but I was more upset for him and upcoming father's day. But he totally didn't get it! He didn't get how for me with all my friends having kids - i'm pretty sure they tilt their head and go "aww poor them"... Thanks but no thanks. I'm totally with everyone here being surrounded by people having kids and pictures on fb popping up with baby bellies... My husband is super supportive, but at the end of the day, I think it's us ladies who really understand the feeling deep down about how much this journey effects us. I haven't done any shots or anything like that yet - i had a hard enough time on 2 months of clomid alone, I don't know what else i can handle. I have such a profound respect for all of you going through the next levels..To the lady who went thru the process with her friend who is know pregnant, how are you doing? I hope that your friend is being very careful, and if you need to vent, i totally get it. My ENTIRE circle of friends have at least 2 kids, so i know what it's like.... Thanks for letting me vent here - i feel like you guys get what i'm saying. Sending everyone hugs..

Cobbler 83 - Have they done much blood work for you? I think the big ones are one week past ovulation and maybe cycle day three. Have you seen your follicles and know they are growing? Do you know you are ovulating on your own?

Lilie315 - Sunday was really hard for me too and DH didn't really get it. I told him I wanted to go chill at a winery but when the day came he was too tired and just wanted us to hang out with his parents. I stayed away from social media because I didn't want to see any of it. It's so much more heartbreaking than being single on valentine's day. I was very proud of myself for getting thru the day without tears, even though it's completely okay for us to cry when we feel overwhelmed.

Does anyone have any thoughts on what we can do to help cope with father's day (I'm praying at least some of us have something to celebrate by then but just in case we don't).