Infertility, Secondary Support Group
"Secondary infertility" is difficulty conceiving after already having conceived and carried a normal pregnancy. Apart from various medical conditions (e.g. hormonal), this may come as a result of age and stress felt to provide a sibling for their first child.
I am new to discussion groups in general. I just need to get this anxiety off my chest. I'm 28 (almost 29) years old. My husband and I accidentally got pregnant 5 years ago and we have a beautiful daughter. I've been off birth control for 2 1/2 years. We weren't actively trying to get pregnant but we weren't preventing it either. I got pregnant again about a year ago and had a miscarriage a week later. Since then I've been charting ovulation and obsessing. Each negative pregnancy test feels like a stab in the heart. Each time a friend gets pregnant I cry with jealousy. I finally called the doctor last week. I'm going to get checked out by my obgyn. I haven't set the appointment yet but it could be a long process. I just hate the unknowns. Is there something wrong with me? Are we not going to have any more kids? I just don't know and the waiting game is awful. Plus I feel like a failure (and I'm sure that's common but still). Thanks for letting me vent.
You could have some underlying medical issues that could be preventing you from getting pregnant. I had a miscarriage when I was in college; I was very young. Years later, I was diagnosed with optometrists and then found out that I had fibroids. I was never actually trying to get pregnant, I was too busy in college and traveling when I could. Doctors had told me that conceiving a child naturally may not happen and that I may need fertility treatments if I was ever ready to have children.
Well, I proved them wrong! I got pregnant two years ago and ended up having a healthy little boy who is almost two now! I still suffer with endometriosis because there is no cure. And my fibroids have gotten smaller due to a fibroid embolization, which has left me pretty much infertile from what my doctor has told me. There is still a chance that I could get pregnant, but I'm not in a relationship now and don't know when I will be again. My doctor recommended that I try to conceive now as much as possible, but I have no one to do that with!
You are very lucky to have a husband that wants to have a family with you. I wish that were me. I hope that your doctor's appointment goes very well. And you never know, you will probably end up with a little miracle like I did. Even now, everyone says that I'll be pregnant soon, even complete strangers tell me that. Funny thing, a few months before I found out I was pregnant with my son, I went to the doctor and I remember the doctor telling me that if I wasn't doing anything to prevent a pregnancy that I would be pregnant or will have already delivered within a year. A year later I was a mom!!! I say that to say that miracles can happen, they occur all the time. And even if you cannot conceive a child, there are other ways to become parents. PLENTY of children are in orphanages awaiting a loving home. I have decided in a few years that I will try to adopt an orphan. I want my son to have a sibling more than anything.
Best of luck to you. Please keep me updated. Feel free to message me anytime.
Best.
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