Incest Survivors Support Group
Incest refers to any sexual activity between closely related persons that is illegal or socially taboo. Consensual adult incest is very rare. Incest between adults and prepubescent or adolescent children is a form of child sexual abuse that has been shown to be one of the most extreme forms of childhood trauma. If you or a loved one is a survivor of incest, join the group...
I am freaking out right now I am crying hysterically and rolling in and out of flashbacks
My biological father who raped me, and my whole family knows, and NO ONE WANTS TO DEAL WITH IT. HE RAPED ME FOR YEARS AND BEAT ME AND THREATENED TO KILL ME EVERY DAY I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE. WHO WOULD DO THAT TO A FOUR FIVE SIX SEVEN EIGHT year old
Thought I would look at my sisters facebook page because we have been distant. On her top friends is my uncle on my "fathers" side who i havnt met as an adult, My sister told me he doesnt talk to my biological dad. I clicked on his page and his friend top popped up that PIECE OF SHIT
I couldnt help it I CLICKED and his HAPPY PHOTOS with his new wife I WANT TO VOMIT. HOW CAN SUCH A MONSTER LIVE OUT IN THE WORLD AND NO ONE NO
I CANT TAKE IT FUCK MY WHOLE FAMILY I HOPE THEY ROT IN HELL
he is out there taking SMILING PICTURES on a YACHT with 20 people "liking" it with that disgusting woman who helped him lie and sneak me around.
I AM LOSING MY MIND OVER THIS. I want to take his ass to court. I want him to rot in jail forever. I want him to fucking die.
I WAKE UP EVERY DAY TO A LIVING HELL TO PAIN INSIDE ME IT NEVER GOES AWAY AND HE IS JUST LIVING HIS LIFE LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED
HOW CAN SOMETHING THIS HORRIBLE BE REAL
My biological father who raped me, and my whole family knows, and NO ONE WANTS TO DEAL WITH IT. HE RAPED ME FOR YEARS AND BEAT ME AND THREATENED TO KILL ME EVERY DAY I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE. WHO WOULD DO THAT TO A FOUR FIVE SIX SEVEN EIGHT year old
Thought I would look at my sisters facebook page because we have been distant. On her top friends is my uncle on my "fathers" side who i havnt met as an adult, My sister told me he doesnt talk to my biological dad. I clicked on his page and his friend top popped up that PIECE OF SHIT
I couldnt help it I CLICKED and his HAPPY PHOTOS with his new wife I WANT TO VOMIT. HOW CAN SUCH A MONSTER LIVE OUT IN THE WORLD AND NO ONE NO
I CANT TAKE IT FUCK MY WHOLE FAMILY I HOPE THEY ROT IN HELL
he is out there taking SMILING PICTURES on a YACHT with 20 people "liking" it with that disgusting woman who helped him lie and sneak me around.
I AM LOSING MY MIND OVER THIS. I want to take his ass to court. I want him to rot in jail forever. I want him to fucking die.
I WAKE UP EVERY DAY TO A LIVING HELL TO PAIN INSIDE ME IT NEVER GOES AWAY AND HE IS JUST LIVING HIS LIFE LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED
HOW CAN SOMETHING THIS HORRIBLE BE REAL
Exact same here.My father thinks all his sins have been forgiven because he is a man of god...well exact everything you said....
Things are still really intense, the law firm called me back yesterday and did a phone consultation where they asked a lot of specific questions and a time line, it felt it lasted forever, i think like 30 mins really.
They said they mostly prosecute institutions but since he owns a business and has a lot of assets they might be able to prosecute him in a civil case, they are supposed to get back to me this week. The legal assistant said that even if they can't take the case they can give me referrals.
I really want to pursue criminal charges but I don't know how to do that and I couldnt manage to get there on the phone with the law firm, I was crying the whole time. I called CPS in the state where it happened, I live across the country now, moved as soon as I turned 18, and am supposed to fax them a request for records so I can find out what was and wasnt reported and why?
Burned a ton of photos my MOTHER of all people sent me of him. Of my family when I was little before everything blew up. WHY DIDNT SOMEONE DO THAT EARLIER? how is it that I AM THE ONE with all these fucking photos, i have 3 older sisters, i thought they were all gone, all photos of him were taken away when I was 9, but she HID THEM? and then mailed them to me a year ago
I finally burned them. Have been crying for days every time I am alone, I have been in recovery program for drinking but drank all weekend, had to call in sick to work.
Ive been crying and reading things all night trying not to drink tonite I think it worked its almost bar time so i cant get any alcohol.
This article for anyone who has ever been abused by a parent:
http://pandys.org/forums/index.php?showtopic=137562
THIS IS MY FAMILY:
Conforming to the silence: A rule of many abusive families is silence. Children watch their mothers being beaten; they are sexually abused and beaten, yet the parents are pillars of the local church. The image and the silence must be maintained at all costs. Adult survivors grow up schooled in the rule of silence, and they keep it, hiding their shame and internal damage. When they begin to break that rule, it can be terrifying. Some survivors may see their siblings getting on with mother and father, and feel that they are deficient for their feelings. It can be particularly horrifying when the survivor knows that other family members know about the abuse, but continue to support the perpetrator anyway.
You have every right to be angry and your family has no right judging you. If they can't deal with it, it makes them part of the problem. Use that anger for some good. NAIL HIM. hugs
TO PROTECT OUR YOUTH
So open your eyes,
And keep a clear mind...
Here come the years,
Of victimized tears.
IM NOW FIGHTING BACK,
I AM A SURVIVOR...!
...and a mother of one!
YA THATS NOT FUN
But something MUST BE DONE!
It is the worst STD since HIV
It's the largest epidemic,
It's the number one crime...
It has happened to every single friend of mine...
But no one does time.
And so it goes on.
And we suffer too,
Because now it has happened to you.
I WANT CHANGE
I WANT ACTION!
I NEED YOU ALL
SO CHANGE WILL TAKE TRACTION...!!!
My name is Levana and my pain is real...
So you do not tell me how to think and to feel,
They say, just think small and focus on self
Don't worry about how to help someone else.
Just think about you, and your family too...
Forget the rest... You have no control of others action
They do what they do... just focus on you...
Well I think thats lame, they are the ones to blame...
If the victim was adult then it would be an assault...
But because the victim is a child, the terminology is very mild,
Molestation works best, and that is very hard to test...
And many victims go to rest, knowing that they
DID THEIR BEST... to but the perpetrator behind bars... to protect others from these scars...
But the victims must rest on, and wait upon another dawn...
Because their caseS linger on, an on, and on...
It could go on for quit some time... This makes no sense...
IT IS A VICIOUS CRIME!
Why do criminals walk the streets,
while cases go untouched for weeks???
Because of the sheer volume,
of perpetrators with this problem.
They say it may take a month,
Before they even look at ours because there are 23 KIDS LIKE MINE AND THE ONE DETECTIVE HAS NO TIME.
THEY ARE OTHERS JUST LIKE US.
Who want a resolution to this stuff...
And the more victims that survive, speak up and stay alive
The more we see these violent crimes...
Because the perpetrators free and they WILL DO IT AGAIN, MOST DEFINITELY ...
Just next time they will be more careful,
More threatening, more intense, because they just escaped the fence
That had them backed against the wall... oh guess what, they say, I DIDNT FALL...
They go on to take a wife. hold their kid up with a knife... and no one talks, no ones aware....
Because THEY TOLD ME not to care what happens to him over there...
Well FUCK YOU ALL... this ones on me...
I VERY STRONGLY DISAGREE!!!
It is my place... to protect another from the terror of my brother.
I will not sit back and say he will not do it again that way...
I do not believe that much is true... But you tell me thats up to YOU?
Why would you care... you do not stare at the pain thats always inside...
And so you can hide in the solace of knowing... You did everything you could and now it is showing.
You feel rewarded and good deep inside when you tell me to go back to sleep and to hide
From reality and the voices of victims... to overt my eyes and forget about change...
there is nothing to do. Thats is deranged!
I want to take back the power... and say that it is wrong...
I will not sit back and just play along...
I WANT SOCIAL CHANGE... THE CHILDREN NEED JUSTICE...
You would all agree... You all know this...
But dont just stare... and say you care...
BE AWARE... these people scare! They should be taken off the street...
And given something gross to eat...
And tell them that it's very wrong... to bring this harm upon a child...
More should be done... this is so wild...
It is the most repeated crime... yet not enough are doing time!
It is only 3% of every person who will spend that time paying for their crime
When I called about DV... the police came... they believed me...
They took away the perpetrator they made sure I was safe...
But when I told them about the way... my daughters life was stolen that day.
All they told me was to wait... and wait and wait...
And its okay to hate... BUT Do not dare humiliate!
The perpetrator is now the victim... what is wrong with this system???
Why do we all protect the morally inept? Because it is 1 in 20 men...
Yes thats right I will say it again 1 and 20 bring this pain...
THAT IS INSANE! that means that, your brother... uncle... neighbor... cousin... friend... or husband
Could be the one that does this stuff... And if that is not enough...
Think about our children 1 in 3 will be molested by 18...
The children hide these things from you
Because they feel responsible too...
You can tell them what you feel
That this feeling isnt real
That they are not the ones to blame...
That they have no shame in that game...
They do not know the way it works... and so they are left feeling hurt
Kids live for validation and affection... and its confusing... they know the questions
But they do not ask or say out loud... because adults are like a cloud....
DOn't blame yourself you have done nothing wrong... Just go on living and singing your song...
Forget that he is free... with someone else on his knee...
Rubbing and petting
Now THEY are bed wetting...
They feel just like you... responsible too... so he moves right along
And nothing is done...
I DEMAND MORE ACTION BE TAKEN...
PROTECT OUR YOUTH... PROTECT OUR NATION
FORGET ABOUT TAKING VACATIONS...
THINK ABOUT CHANGING THE WAY WE ALL SAY
WE KNOW YOU WILL BE BETTER SOMEDAY
LETS BE BETTER NOW... LETS STOP IT SOMEHOW...
AND FIGHT FOR THE RIGHTS OF CHILDREN UNITED...
MAKE THE PERPETRATOR PAY... DON'T LET HIM SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY...
ONLY THEN WILL ALL THIS GO AWAY...
LET THEM TAKE THE BLAME TODAY! NOT TOMORROW OR IN TWO YEARS, JUST AS SOON AS YOU HEAR THIS...
HE HURT ME IN MY PRIVATE PART... THATS ENOUGH... FOR ANYONE... TO BE TAKEN FROM THE SUN,
AND PUT INTO A DARK JAIL CELL, UNTIL TRIAL... THEIR RIGHTS CAN GO TO HELL...
LETS TREAT THIS LIKE WE TREAT DV... THEN YOU WILL REALLY SEE
THE DIFFERENCE WILL BE COMPLETE
IT WILL BE A BIG DEFEAT FOR ALL THOSE POWER HUNGER MEN...
WHO LIKE TO DO THIS STUFF AND THEN TURN AROUND AND SAY WE WILL NOT LET THEM GET AWAY...
SIT BACK AND WAIT, WE WILL HANDLE YOUR CASE... DO NOT HURRY THIS IS NO RACE!
WELL I DISAGREE... DO, NOW YOU SEE ME... I AM IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE...
I WILL NEVER GET OFF YOUR CASE...
CHANGE IT, OR DEAL... BECAUSE I WONT LET YOU STEAL THE INNOCENCE OF ONE MORE CHILD...
YOU WILL HEAR FROM ME... I WILL BE WILD!
I WILL NOT GO AWAY UNTIL YOU ALL SAY...
LETS LIVE IN THE SOLUTION AND SEE RESOLUTION UNTIL THE CONCLUSION
Okay, so I have a choice to make, I can sit back and wait,
Or I can take action, against perverted attraction to children,
Its wrong, we all know it, but nobody shows it,
they keep that inside, so embarrassed we hide,
Its disgusting to talk about it, it makes everyone sick,
and so we don't tell, we keep that a secret,
Im starting to realize that its not the perpetrator,
It's the system,
that violates rights, and looses fights,
Im pissed as you can plainly see...
Wont you join me, come tell your story,
Survive this with GLORY...
Im ready to fight, right through my life, for all of your rights...
IM CHANGING THE WAY THIS GETS HANDLED TODAY...
BUT I NEED ALL OF YOU
TO HAVE A VOICE TOO!
Im writing a book... OUR SURVIVOR STORY... and i want to hear yours...
Anonymously or Biographically , tell me your story,
What happened to you?
Who did you tell?
What happened then?
And what happened to them?
Send your story to oursurvivorstory@gmail.com
And then you will see AWARENESS come on
To society... to people who care,
To people who can change this disaster, I SWARE.
GOD WONT LET US DOWN, HE LEADS ME ON, AND BECAUSE OF HIM IM STRONGER...
Have you ever heard of the domino effect... the proof that one can transfer energy to another...
The dominos have always fallen in a certain way, until today... But I am here, LET ME MAKE THIS CLEAR...
I AM THE BIGGER DOMINO! AND I WILL PUSH THE OTHER WAY...! OKAY... THATS ALL FOR TODAY...
BUT STAY TUNED TOMORROW, AND THE NEXT DAY TOO... UNTIL I HAVE REACHED EVERY ONE OF YOU...
THANKS FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND YOUR LOVE AND ATTENTION, TO CHILDREN UNITED, THEY DESERVE OUR AFFECTION!
This continues to be tough. Havn't heard back from the lawyer. This week I got some new tattoos over a bunch of self harm scars I had all over my upper thighs. It is an amazing feeling to look down and see two beautiful ribbons tied into bows instead of all those thick white scars that made me sad even 10 years later every time I looked at them.
My counselor suggested I write a list of all the reasons I am doing this so that I can be strong when my family argues and resists. Number one like you talked about mamas is I swear he will DO IT AGAIN
and I'm so scared he already has. It keeps me up at night, like right now, I bartend and normally sleep till noon because I work till 3 am but here it is 6 am, no sleep.
IF SOMEONE HAD DONE THIS WHEN MY OLDER SISTER TOLD HER TEACHER AND THE TEACHER CALLED CPS NONE OF THIS WOULD HAVE HAPPENED> THEY KEPT SENDING ME ON UNSUPERVISED PATERNITY VISITS BECAUSE NO ONE WANTED TO TAKE HIS ASS TO COURT
FUCK THIS