Hi, what you say really resonates with me. I have suffered greatly from severe health anxiety for 15 years. Some times I am completely normal and enjoying life then I have physical symptoms and completely go off on one and make myself ill, then I believe the symptoms are cancer and seek constant reassurance from doctors, do MRI's. Then I am better for a while until the next episode. Drives me mad but can't seem to get out of this Vicious circle. Very tiring!

Hi ols, thanks for your response. I can totally relate to the constant cycle that you're in. I've been riding the exhausting and miserable rollercoaster for about two years now. Before that, I probably had a milder form of health anxiety that was more manageable and went away quicker. Can I ask if you ever tried certain methods to combat the health anxiety? Like therapy (CBT) or medication? I know there's a way out for us... but, are we willing (and brave enough) to try to go there?

To comfort myself, I think about the impermanence of life and that illness is a part of life. I ask myself, why am I so afraid of illness? Is it death or is it some other underlying fear that has nothing to do with death or illness at all? Why is it that some people don't have health anxiety and we do? We all are prone to get sick sooner or later, so why are we so terrified?

I guess these are just questions I'm asking and it would be nice to discuss these thoughts with someone who can relate.

Hope you can try to enjoy the weekend. Remember, you're not alone :)

Thanks for your reply. I have seen various therapists and psychiatrists, it has helped to a certain extent but then I fall back into it again. I need to try CBT again but I didn't find it that helpful a few years ago. It is indeed very strange to think the amount of time we lose feeling sick and worried about cancer etc when friends and family don't give it a second thought and just live their lives to the full. I am still hopeful we will get there soon. Thanks for reaching out, I am confident the future will be bright, it is just one step at a time. I am not asking to never have this feelings and thoughts, that would be unrealistic but just being able to rationalise a bit and take a step back. Let me know if can support in any way. Happy to discuss always. Ols

I am 23 years old and have battled with health anxiety since I was 18 - I can completely relate to how you feel. One thing I've realised about health anxiety is that it's a uniquely isolating branch of anxiety - most people you know CAN'T relate to it (especially a young person like myself - bodily sensations and the fear of illness really aren't something people of my age group are usually worrying about). I feel like things like depression, and even general anxiety, are much broader experiences and are thus a lot easier to talk about with others. That being said, I'm glad you've reached out for support here - there are a whole community of people (like myself) who know exactly what you're going through, and we have your back. I think the first step you can take in regards to dealing with health anxiety (after acknowledging it) is trying to understand how your own health anxiety works. For example, I have come to realise that any given health anxiety of mine is the result of one of two fears. Firstly, a fear of death (resulting in preoccupations with things like cancer, heart attack symptoms and life-threatening viruses, such as meningitis). Secondly, a fear of the social implications of certain illnesses (such as HIV, which I fear would limit the amount of people who would want to be with me and so forth). Understanding your health anxiety helps to identify the underlying issue. For example, the latter example I just gave indicates that I have a fear of being alone, which is why many of the social-implication-based health anxieties I have experienced have centred around the illness making me unattractive/undateable. Because I have realised this, I can work on that particular insecurity. I'm not sure my comment will be much help, but I hope you can take something away from it!

X

Yes, I know exactly how you feel. I really have nobody to even talk to as they just say "you're fine". I've been having this problem since my mom dropped dead suddenly in 2009. She was only 58. I'm having symptoms that are very scary and my doctor wants me to go and have tests but I'm scared to death to go.

I think I'm finally coming to terms with the fact that I have health anxiety. I've never been on a support group for anything before so I appreciate everyone on here sharing their stories and making it feel like a comfortable place to open up a little.
I completely empathize with the exhausting and miserable roller coaster you're describing. When I fall back into the anxiety hole and feel like I'm drowning, I try so hard to remember what it was like to feel "normal". I'm completely detached from reality and I'm just living in my own little secret hell of constant worry.
I know this stems from the grief of losing my father to cancer when I was 23 (he was 49). I constantly think I have cancer or ALS or HIV or any other horrible disease. I can't stop myself from Googling every single "symptom" (and every day there's a new one). I have ovarian cysts and had a pelvic ultrasound on Tuesday for the 4th time in 5 months because I'm convinced I have cancer and am dying. I go to get the results tomorrow and have been an absolute mess during this waiting time.
I don't know how to stop this cycle. I feel like I'm in too deep now and it's never going to end. I just want to be back to normal and be the best mom I can be to my son, but I feel like I'm losing my mind.