Healthy Sex Support Group
This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.
Hi everyone!
I am in desperate need of some opinions. This may be long but here we go. To start off I have been in my relationship with my boyfriend for 5 years now. The last couple of YEARS the sex has been limited quite a bit. And yes I know the honey stage moon goes away I get that. But this is just too much. I've talked to him and talked to him about it. I've also cried about it to because it feels so hurtful and frustrating. It's a feeling if not being wanted. But I don't think that's the case. I know he's not cheating. He says that he just doesn't have the desire hardly anymore. So I think ok it is me like what do I do. He says he also has no drive because of him gaining weight and being tired all the time. He does sleep ALOT. He says all the time it's not me. He's still very loving and stuff toward me. Even though it's not just sex he won't hardly do anything at all. Like four play or anything. I'm at my breaking point. I want to feel loved and I'm desperate it's a thought that constantly stays with me it's extremely hurtful. PLEASE TELL ME YOUR OPINIONS. Also if there are men out there who have experienced this with their partners tell me what you were feeling.
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
I dont know how much weight we are talking, but if its been quite a bit that could be the problem. Could be almost anything though really. If you can talk him into it, it probably would be a good ideal for him to talk to a doctor. Might be low testosterone levels. That seems to be a growing problem actually.
I've had two husbands fight me over taking care of their health. I usually won but it was intense and upsetting for me. We are talking both health and mental health issues where I sat them down and said you must seek help. One almost died of a health issue and he kept minimizing to his doctor while I was saying no, doctor, he is not better. This is not unusual doctors tell me that men simply refuse medical and psychological help. That is really sad how society has handicapped men in this matter.
But if a guy said to me, yes hun you need to go get medical help for your sex drive problem, I would feel like I wasn't living up to his expectation and if I didn't try harder he would eventually leave me. I don't want someone to leave me. Maybe I need to have more marriage counseling around this. Like what would exactly turn you on or what things can I do to make you feel in the mood to try or that you find enjoyable. It's hard being with someone who doesn't try to put you in the mood or is more interested in getting themselves off than their partner because they dont' know how to get a girl off. Yeah, sometimes sex can be complicated. But yeah, if a guy told me to see a dr and get some pills, I would feel like of worthless or that I'm not "performing enough" aka I'm not good enough. I can't just do what I feel inside, I have to perform or be cast aside. Being loving and affectionate isn't enough. Well my husband and I don't even do that. Like I said, more like roommates, it's horrible.