I believe it depends on the person. My current bf is more then happy to please me as I to him. Others were...not so much. But the past lovers I've had, had not made excuses either. It was there or it wasn't. I do think yours is being a bit selfish or maybe he just doesn't like to. You might be best just asking him why he doesn't seem to care or why he makes excuses that hurt you.

Personally I think this is not a guy girl issue but a person thing. I mean that some people like to give and receive, others would be satisfied to simply receive. Me personally I love to give, the look in her face as I go down on her is super exciting. It increases the pleasure for both of us. However, I have plenty of friends who love to receive and think because they stick their penis inside that they have entered the giving arena. On the other hand the last girl I was with didn't mind the receiving, but never returned the favor. Comments prove that he is a bit on the selfish side, maybe you can talk to him about this and say that it's not nice to have a one sided sex life.

if you are unhappy or unfulfilled with the balance of things then there is a problem. Let him know his comments are hurtful and unwelcome. Try talking to him outside the bedroom. Let him know you would like more reciprocation from him. If all else fails, just give him a rain check and see how he likes it. Good Luck!

Personally pleasing my partner has nothing to do with a favor. We share our wants, needs and desires together. There is no score card or keeping track of who's turn it is. We both enjoy giving willingly and it works. We both want to enjoy one another so it's not like either of us is ever left out. We both enjoy giving and receiving.

Okay, let me clarify. I'm certainly not keeping a "scorecard" or really seeing this as doing each other "favors" per se (I know I said that, but that's not literally what I mean), as it is something that strengthens the intimacy between us as we can pleasure each other. I'm not saying "I do this for you X number of times a day, now I want Y number of things in return, it's only fair". What I mean by my question is more like, are there times when your partner disappoints you by turning down the chance to please you, when he knows that there is something that you crave at the time? Again, to clarify, I don't mean for there to be any kind of scorecard, as if things need to be perfectly balanced.
By all means, give and receive as much as you'd like. The purpose of my question is to see if people ever experience sexual dissatisfaction, this is made apparent to the partner, and the partner does nothing to help.

No, my partner is always wanting and willing to pleasure me in any way I want.

No my partner is always more than willing and wanting to pleasure me.

Well if I currently had a partner....

Anyhow, I understood your position. I think you should talk with him seriously. He may not even truly realize that he is falling short in this area. A lot of guys I know don't even think about giving oral sex to their partners, that's why I said it's more of a person thing, cause I know girls that think giving oral is weird.

"...are there times when your partner disappoints you by turning down the chance to please you, when he knows that there is something that you crave at the time?"

Change "he" to "she" and you have one of the big reasons my ex is my ex, and this extends beyond our sex life. Within our sex life, she would occasionally accommodate me, but it was apparent she wasn't enjoying it, even though I am convinced she did on a deep level that she ignored.

I've never asked my girlfriend for blowjobs ever I ALWAYS go down on her though I don't care if the favor isn't returned

I am wondering if the 'equal and mutual' aconades would be the same if the roles were reversed. If he gave you all the oral sex you wanted but you would not take care of his needs in that area. I am encouraged by so many people here that are saying that it is a matter of respect and desire to meet the other partners needs that is at the core of your behaviors.

I on the other hand have a great deal of pain resulting from the fact that my wife reciprocates my ginuine desire to take care of her needs in this area, with a dutiful, limited response. I have seldom experienced oral sex from her where her heart was in it fully focused on my pleasure, but rather making sure she didnt have to suffer the taste. She even stopped short of my orgasms when I was wearing condoms.

So, not having had any oral sex in a year now, should I stop giving it to her? She will not discuss it with me. And a simple request provokes anger.

Is it supposed to be reciprocal in the other direction? or is it just that women expect reciporocity, but do not really intend to be reciprocal.

Excuse my tone... its been a long year.

@ Choosethisday: You asked IMO, that would be a selfish woman and my reply would be the same. My thoughts are the same for men and women, if he's doing all the giving and she's just taking without concern for his pleasure, she's a selfish lover.

For me, I would feel the same if I was getting all the oral or whatever pleasure it is and he wasn't. If he wasn't, it would be a choice he made not to recieve, it sure wouldn't be my choice. I don't give him oral or do anything for him as a favor to him, I do it because I enjoy doing it, I get pleasure from giving.

I wouldn't be in a one-sided relationship and I wouldn't be in a relationship where we can't discuss things without anger flaring up and where we couldn't work together at compromising and finding a solution.