Healthy Sex Support Group
This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.
I've been meeting pretty young ladies who seem more dreamy and romantic in their desires, and some more mature ladies who have "been there, done that" and simply want to fulfill their sexual desires. Which do y'all prefer?
I find myself more comfortable in sex. Romance...geez, I'm trying to be romantic, but sometimes I wonder how romantic I really am. I guess it's just a matter of having a caring heart and trying to remain in harmony with hers-! You CAN teach an old dog new tricks, but it's hard.
I find myself more comfortable in sex. Romance...geez, I'm trying to be romantic, but sometimes I wonder how romantic I really am. I guess it's just a matter of having a caring heart and trying to remain in harmony with hers-! You CAN teach an old dog new tricks, but it's hard.
The biggest issue I've had with some romantic types is the notion that romantic or emotional is somehow better, or the right way, to have sex and should be what we should strive for all the time. I like variety, and feeling like I'm able to experience variety is important to me. I would be dissatisfied if all I could have was wholesome sex.
Like AIU mentioned, often the connection part is done out of the bedroom. Things that may not be sexual per se, but enhance your relationship. When a sexual woman feels safe, accepted and respected, then desires can be unleashed.
Missfits post reminded me of a time when a lover told me she wanted to do something special for me. Of course, she was thinking in the immediate time frame, but what I said was:
Be at my place 2 fridays from now at 7 pm sharp. I'll answer the door wearing nothing but a condom. I'll pull you inside, push you up against the wall, reach under your skirt, rip your panties off, and nail you right to the wall.
Then, over the next 10 days, I would make little references to it in all our conversations. On the monday before, I told her no further communication till then unless to cancel. Typically with our lives we are always on a schedule, confirming, calling to say I'm on the road, etc. I did this to provide some contrast and let some anxiety build.
So now 7PM on friday occurs. It took no more than 15 seconds from the time she knocked on the door till I was inside her, and it was all over in another minute.
Would you consider that romantic? Was it just sex? Was there any foreplay? Was I just another minute man? What emotions were involved? Was I respectful?
Of course, none of these questions were issues at the time! LOL.
I'm in my first long term relationship - I've only had one prior to this that has lasted just slightly over a year - and I'm finding that passion is harder and harder to come by after a long amount of time with someone. To me, passion is important because it factors into both sex and romance. But passion isn't everything.
However I'm always horny and thinking about sex, and I love a good romp in the sack. :)
Also, a point was made that if I am having sex with the ex, I shouldn't be with other women. I agree, and I'm not w/ other women.