Healthy Sex Support Group
This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.
Im just interested in your take on this.
Its been bothering me so I hoped posting on here would get it out of my head!
My Husband and I were on a boating holiday on a river boat. We were having a nice time in bed, making love it was all nice and intimate.
Then all of a sudden he said lets do it doggy style.( yes that bit is ok!) but what I didn't know was he had opened the curtains and the door so we could be seen. He positioned me so I could be seen by a passing boat.
We tried to get me to pose so they could see me having a good time.
It was just such an about turn in his demeanour and I felt so yukky after that it killed the moment for me. I just felt degraded.
How would you feel?
My Husband has a bit of a history of behaviour that makes me feel like this. When we used to go out dancing he would physically push me onto other men and try and get others to see my breasts and vocally discussing our sex life in a bar.
I don't know what to feel about this. or him really.
He keeps on hurting me too, like a bite on my nipple or a scratch as he puts his fingers inside me. If I complain he says oh just behave and stop moving around. I do have talks with him out of the bedroom about this and to be honest its making me feel like I want to avoid sex with him. His last 3 ( yes 3) marriages all failed because his wives wouldn't sleep with him after a certain time so he started finding sex elsewhere. He is the clumsiest lover I have ever known!
Its been bothering me so I hoped posting on here would get it out of my head!
My Husband and I were on a boating holiday on a river boat. We were having a nice time in bed, making love it was all nice and intimate.
Then all of a sudden he said lets do it doggy style.( yes that bit is ok!) but what I didn't know was he had opened the curtains and the door so we could be seen. He positioned me so I could be seen by a passing boat.
We tried to get me to pose so they could see me having a good time.
It was just such an about turn in his demeanour and I felt so yukky after that it killed the moment for me. I just felt degraded.
How would you feel?
My Husband has a bit of a history of behaviour that makes me feel like this. When we used to go out dancing he would physically push me onto other men and try and get others to see my breasts and vocally discussing our sex life in a bar.
I don't know what to feel about this. or him really.
He keeps on hurting me too, like a bite on my nipple or a scratch as he puts his fingers inside me. If I complain he says oh just behave and stop moving around. I do have talks with him out of the bedroom about this and to be honest its making me feel like I want to avoid sex with him. His last 3 ( yes 3) marriages all failed because his wives wouldn't sleep with him after a certain time so he started finding sex elsewhere. He is the clumsiest lover I have ever known!
gawd.
I will try and make an appointment to chat to someone about how I stand. One of my friends is an ex-lawyer she might know. Im trying really hard to build up my business but he is always getting on at me to give him more attention. ( I have started an art therapy Spa)
Anything is okay, as long as both partners are on the same page. He sounds as though he has some kinks and you haven't consented to be part of them. You aren't obligated to be part of it.
I'm not going to jump on the 'abuse' bandwagon. IMHO - it's possible given the bit of history you've given us, he believes 'if you try it you'll like it' or that satisfying his needs/wants/desires are more important that staying within your comfort zone.
*YOU* are not happy/comfortable with what is happening. *YOU* are not happy/comfortable with the sex. YOU get to decide what YOU want/need/desire! Don't cave or allow behaviours that do not make you feel good.
You and your body deserves to be appreciated and worshipped.
Tell him you won't let him enter you with his fingers if he continues to try to scratch you in the process. Tell him you don't like him to bite your nipples and it's not a turn on. Hope things go better for you, hun!