Healthy Sex Support Group
This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.
I have been married for 15 years and about a year ago, I went to the computer to check email and found that my dh had left his private email account open and there were emails from a man that he had responded to from craigslist. I fell apart! I was raised in a very strict house and did not learn about sex until I was married the first time. I confronted him about it and he of coarse appologized to me and said that he was just curious how a man could do that. From the emails that I read, it was not just curiousity. Then I began to find gay porn sites on the computer. We have a family computer and my two boys use it so I was furious. Now, when we try to have sex, he can not keep an errection. He blames it on me because he doesn't think that I am "into" it. After 5 failed attempts, I get pretty frustrated. At this point, I just want to have an orgasm!!!!! I used to love having sex and trying new things, but that was with my first husband. I feel like I am not what he wants and it makes me feel like shit.
-
So mad at Xfinity! They're trying to charge me $115 per month for the same service I had been paying $50 the last four years. I took the equipment to UPS for shipping and cancelled my subscription today! Next door was a cookie shop called Crumbl. I had heard of it before but never went in until today. I don't need one more sugar fix, but maybe it will help with my sad) grieving heart....$15...
-
check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
First I am going to tell you that this is not your fault and DO NOT take the blame from him or allow him to use you as a scape goat for his downfalls that seem to be related to him being gay trying to live a streight life.
I really dont know how to offer advice on this subject, but I can give you my support. JMHO I would feel like maybe he is either gay or bi-curious. I can only speak for myself and being TOTALLY HETRO I could not ever even concieve of doing something like that.
Sorry I am not much help.
Hugs and best of luck.
Watching gay porn in itself I don't believe means anything, many straight women watch lesbian porn but that doesn't mean they're bi or lesbians. Private sexual emailing I think says a lot more.
If it turns out he is bi or bi-curious and he can satisfy those urges by just watching gay porn and through fantasy during masturbation without acting on them with other men, is that something you can accept about him or is it a deal breaker?
As for him not being able to get erections the last few times, if he's never had this problem before with you then I wouldn't say it's related to him being gay trying to live a straight life. My guess would be it has more to do with some tension between the two of you and him being busted with the gay porn and emails.
The two of you need to have an open, honest, rational discussion about it and then decide where to go from there.
He may have alot of guilt and a fear of your anger so communicate with him in a gentle loving way if you want to get the truth out of him. If he is gay, then suppressing those feelings will cause alot of problems. He may turn to self harm or even suicide if he is forced to live a life contrary to what his sexual indentity is.
So be careful what you say and how you say it. I know you feel like shit but it has absolutely nothing to do with you so stop blaming yourself!
Communication is key so time to have an honest discussion, about what he wants to do with his life and then take it from there.
God Bless and TC