Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
She's 22, I'm 55, we met at work. She's just lost with no direction in life and precious little emotional support. She expressed interest in me, and I should have maintained a work relationship. I was in the middle of inventorying something and she asked a really open ended question about my personal life and I was curt with her and she cried. We met for pizza after work that night and a couple more times and there are mutual plans that at some point things will go further.This girl has been around the block a few times, worked as a stripper, recently broke up with a drug dealing boyfriend
I have a sad history of Knight-in-Shiny-Armor attempting to rescue Damsel in distress type failed relationships. Yet here I am like The Fool of the Tarot deck, walking blithely along the edge of a precipice with my dog dancing beside me.
The arguments for are terrible: I'm convinced that offering her real and honest emotional support, some guidance, and of course lots of orgasms, it will help her overcome her daily marijuana habit.
I'm definitely a Baby Boomer, I knew all my grandparents who lived through the Great Depression and I've had difficulty in relationships with Gen X women, I can only imagine how much that will be multiplied with a Gen Y girl.
Can I make this work for few months and help this girl or am I just terrible for considering it?
I have a sad history of Knight-in-Shiny-Armor attempting to rescue Damsel in distress type failed relationships. Yet here I am like The Fool of the Tarot deck, walking blithely along the edge of a precipice with my dog dancing beside me.
The arguments for are terrible: I'm convinced that offering her real and honest emotional support, some guidance, and of course lots of orgasms, it will help her overcome her daily marijuana habit.
I'm definitely a Baby Boomer, I knew all my grandparents who lived through the Great Depression and I've had difficulty in relationships with Gen X women, I can only imagine how much that will be multiplied with a Gen Y girl.
Can I make this work for few months and help this girl or am I just terrible for considering it?
It sounds pretty terrible yes.
I made a really messed up 55 year old male friend. We ended up having sex in his room at a half way house.
Yes, these were really unhealthy choices, but at that particular moment he was the only person who served me a sandwich on a paper plate, found me some hot Coffee, held my hand and told me that I was going to make it and , of course, I did.
I think you both know it is a glimpse. You are both consenting adults.
Shit happens. Maybe this is suppose to happen.
She doesn't need multiple orgasms to get her life straightened out. Right now it sound like she needs a really good friend who can give her some real support and sound advice to guide her to a better feeling of self worth.
If you cannot provide her with that you should probably step away from the situation and maybe even do some work on yourself to stop yourself from getting caught up in these fix-her-up rescuing damsels in distress kind of relationships, and find a way to find a decent healthy relationship for yourself.
But I would agree with the sentiment that you need to hold onto your credit cards, your cash, your valuables and for god's sake wear a condom........and I guess - prepare to be judged........particularly in the workplace. You may want to keep it quiet there.
Why set yourself up for failure?
Why not wait to see what life has in store for you? Remember, you have choices in your life. You can say Yes and No.
Say no. You'll be a better person for it. The sex will not be worth it or saving this damsel IMHO.
She'll be hooked on you and multiple orgasms same as she's hooked on pot, or she'll use you for a cushy place to live while she scores pot, same as you'll use her for sex, and she'll probably be banging young bucks AT YOUR PLACE when you're not around. Obviously you're both coming from a place of desperation. If you both like the arrangement and you're not married,, great, rock on. Use rubbers RELIGIOUSLY for sex. You don't want to raise a kid from this girl while she's off partying.
because plenty of older me "hook up" date and marry 20 yr olds, not impossible, just not always smart ..
Come on man!
I am 50 and would NEVER even consider getting involved with a man that much younger than me!
You think you're helping her? Well now isn't that a nice try at assuaging your real interests. Let's do a reality check here: You're a dirty old man helping himself to a girl young enough to be your daughter.