Healthy Relationships Support Group
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Since it's important for both people in a relationship to mutually agree on money, what are your attitudes?
Gone are the days, for me, of free-spending idiocy, borrowing more than I will be able to pay back, the "build it and they will come" philosophy of using credit to run a business. Now there's a tight rein on finances, bitching every time I have to buy something, however small, to keep the business running, because that detracts money from the basic necessities, food and shelter.
I think we have to treat ourselves once in awhile, because life is short, but, overall, I think we should all be religiously saving, squirreling away every penny possible for the future, and start buying gold, which will soon be the only liquid currency worth any value, because, with the U.S. government's wreckless spending, sorry to say, unless we have Superpacs, we're all going to get poorer.
You?
Gone are the days, for me, of free-spending idiocy, borrowing more than I will be able to pay back, the "build it and they will come" philosophy of using credit to run a business. Now there's a tight rein on finances, bitching every time I have to buy something, however small, to keep the business running, because that detracts money from the basic necessities, food and shelter.
I think we have to treat ourselves once in awhile, because life is short, but, overall, I think we should all be religiously saving, squirreling away every penny possible for the future, and start buying gold, which will soon be the only liquid currency worth any value, because, with the U.S. government's wreckless spending, sorry to say, unless we have Superpacs, we're all going to get poorer.
You?
this is embarrassing but going to fix it....
Dave: Condolences. One thing at a time. Make the highest priority thing the first priority.
belovely: Congrats! What do you do for a living?
Money IS love, because what we love, we spend money on! Therefore, communicating what we love is important in a relationship, because it will cost money!
btw want to know how stupid i am? besides racking up a lot of debt? i paid credit debtors $770 (two months worth) to help settle my debt for half of what i owe. i believed they were real. lol!!!! i should have known but despite my skepticism with them and my desperation i fell for the bs and wound up losing money. now my credit is bad too. haha!!! things to teach my children - dont turn out like me! in any way!
I will never have another credit card if I can help it. I use my check card as a credit card to help rebuilt my credit, and I have to eat a lot of ramen and banquet meals, but I get by. Using credit cards is just a really bad idea.
I used Newpath Financial, and they did a great job. They settled $8k in credit debt for around $4,500, which I paid them for a year, at $370 a montth. Done.
Now, one MORE credit card, that I owe $12k on, mostly due to buying expensive video equipment that was supposed to generate more profit than it did...I just rolled that balance onto a 0% for 12 months card, which I cut up, am only using it as an ACCOUNT to pay down this debt. After that 12 months is up, I'll be calling Newpath again and settle on whatever remainder there is.
Now, I am pretty financially sound. I pay off my credit card every month, have retirement savings, a 403b, own my home and car, and have money in the bank. I don't stress about money anymore because I don't have him there sucking our accounts dry.
As I understand it, in his new marriage with the skank ho/now wife, all they do is shop, shop, shop. They travel, buy cars, live in a big new house, and own a boat. Believe it or not, he was debt free when he left our marriage (I had to assume some of his debt because I had more assets), yet now I am almost debt-free and he is not.
I really do think that couples need to be somewhat compatible on spending. Because I got married so young, I didn't realize my ex had such a problem with money. Now money is the primary reason I will not remarry. I will not mix my money with someone else's and will not assume their debt, nor do I expect some guy to assume my debt. I will also never be in a position where a spouse cheats on me and then tries to rape me financially.
Ain't gonna happen.
People want to live like movies stars, drink champagne...on a beer budget. Gotta have fun and be sexy in a more down-to-earth way...
I could probably call Newpath to work out a reduction on the $12k NOW, but $12k in debt, even halved, will still necessitate a $600 a month mandatory payment, and, some months, it just ain't there.
If and when I find a significant other, I will have a budget where we both contribute to the main household account. But I will have control over my money.
I am very cheap, and have always been careful with my money. My husband on the other hand was not. Thankfully we each had our own credit cards, and we agreed to keep our own debt, but it could have gone bad easily.
I don't believe in credit cards for frivolous things, I only use them for larger purchases such as summer camps for kids, new furniture, hotels etc. I never put meals or entertainment on the credit card, because that meal you had a month ago never seems to have been worth it when you get the credit card.
I want to live a nice live, but I also want to have as little debt as I can. You never know what could happen in live, death, injury, job-loss etc.