While I am not morally judgmental and have had some unconventional relationships during my life, some of which society judged as wrong, I am offering my viewpoint on polyamorous groups (back in my day hippie communes). While we are "animals" in body, we have very complex minds and emotions compared to the animals. It may start out as everybody being happy, but sooner or later the very HUMAN traits of jealousy, possessiveness, and territorialism can emerge. It takes a very special, detached type of temperament to tolerate one's mate also being with another (or several others).

I realize I'm an old bird, but I think Elvis may have had a point when he sang,
"There are some things in life you just can't share,
cuz when you bring a friend into your love affair,
that's the end of your sweetheart,
that's the end of your friend,
and baby that's when your heartaches begin!"

Living water I could not have said it any better. I too have been around the block a few times and I agree...Ron

Same here. The block walking got old. Lol

I agree that a poly group would be good. Most people look at you sideways if you try to talk about it, lol. In the meantime, if you want to discuss things with other poly folks, PMs might work well. If you need to chat feel free to send a mail. I wouldn't mind bouncing some ideas and concerns off of others too.

i would like to say a few words about the idea of sharing partners and factoring in jealousy.

living in a polyamorous marriage takes a commitment from those involved to communicate. it also requires that each member involved have a very well developed sense of self awareness. i say this because in my discovery that i am poly i relate it to discovering my sexual identity. it is generally accepted today that a person is simply gay because that is who they are. its the same for me being poly, i just am. however unfortunately the society constructs lead us to punish ourselves and others for the simplicity of being who we are. so here's where i deal issues of insecurity and jealousy and identity just like in monogamous relationships straight or gay.

i guess what i'm trying to say is monogamous people deal with jealousy and identity issues and coming out of the closet and diversity and unfair judgement just because they are trying to be who they are while dealing with an everyday life of bills, work, family, ect ect. so do i. i don't want to convert you, just share a glimpse into my world. thank you

I am poly, and my hubby feels the only way for him is monogamy. It is hard for us because on top of feeling the need for monogamy he is trans and bi, so I feel like he, even more than me, needs more in a relationship than just me. He suggested an open relationship for us but then got hard feelings when I found what I considered my second boyfriend. We both liked him, and even tried a three way, to see if that would help his hang up. It did for a bit, but he is still mildly jealous even after I broke up with the boyfriend (who neglected to tell his other partner about me-not cool dude). Now I feel like I can't pursue polyamory, even though it is what I need now. This kind of situation is the kind of thing only someone else who is poly can help with, so if you find a group let me know!

Mother2 this post is from 2014..... You might want to start a new post if you wanted to start a new discussion