I'm as romantic as a socket wrench, so I'll betcha dollars to wishes you have already guessed I'd listen to my body. Romantics tend to come with allot of not-so-romantic maintenance needs.

Do you have friends? Peer supporters? It takes a village to live a healthy life, with or without Prince Charming.

Hmm that's tough. I know how ya feel. First, I feel its important to figure out why you "need" some one to not feel lonely. Do you have any friends? Are you keeping in contact with family & close friends? Often times, I have found when that part of your life is lacking, its tends to exacerbate the loneliness one may already be feeling. In the past when I'd feel the need to be romantically involved with some one I do remember noticing how when I hung out with a group of people and simply enjoyed myself the "lonely" feeling was not so bad. It was tolerable and I'd go home not feeling so desperate.
Second, I would say to pay attention to your body. If your body is reluctant to allow you to go on a dating site then perhaps its not suitable for you ever or just not right now. Although ive heard of many horror stories , I do know three people that unexpectedly met the love of their life on a dating site. One woman is a former colleage. Shes a bit older with grown kids. The other female is a young adult late 20s or early 30s. Three years later shes now engaged to her love. The third person is a guy I know that was simply looking for company (no intimacy) and found some one on the App Tinder who was claiming to want the same. Turns out him and this guy clicked and have been happily together for four years now. They're such a cute couple. So you never know. Keep an open mind ☺ but do pay attention to instincts & intuition.
Last but not least, I'd say no matter what work on filling your cup cause even if the perfect person entered your life today and all seemed like a fairy tale eventually the honey moon phase ends (perfectly natural) and those old un resolved feelings of "loneliness" may creep back in because let's face it no one is perfect and no one can be perfect 100% of the times forever and ever and ever ...
Take this time to figure out who you are, what makes you happy vs. Full filled, what do you want out of life? What kind of person do you envision your self being with? How would you want this person to meet you?

You are going to be just fine!

Xoxox

Thanks for sending a rely, I was married for 7 years.It started off so well.we made each other laugh and had so much fun. as time went on I had to leave due to his consent lying to me about everything. I would forgive him time after time,until it was like the boy who called wolf. I found out this last year he had passed away in May from heart attack. I do miss him and so sorry things ended the way they did. I never wanted any harm towards him and always wished him well. I did get a divorce after I left him.Since then I have been talking to a man,that I have been friends with for years,.He tells me all the right things that I want to here,but he will not comet to a relationship. This is so emotional up and downs with him. That is why I wanted to maybe get on a dateing site and see what is out there. I want someone who will take the time to get to know each other. I just want to be happy again and a lot of this is wanting someone in my life.

It sounds like this man whom you are talking to is not looking for romance with you. It could be that you are merely a phone friend or perhaps just casual sex. You don't have to be either if this isn't what you want. It is okay to love yourself first and foremost and don't sit around waiting for another human being to solve your problems, make you happy, etc. He doesn't want a relationship with you, I assume that means romantic relationship, but you do have some kind of friendship. Can you just allow that friendship to be enough, plutonic friends I mean? The just wanting to be happy starts within us. Its often hard work to learn to love ourselves first and find ourselves "enough" without needing another person to complete us. No one can complete us, this is a myth. When we are not whole or emotionally healthy, we attract others who are not whole or emotional healthy, or are users looking for weak people. Consider finding free or low cost events and start going to them. Or volunteer with something once a week. Figure out what kinds of things you'd like to learn or do and pursue your life. The problem with just going on dating sites and talking to people is this is often not real. Mostly not real. It might feel like human contact to you, but just texting or emailing or chatting online is not direct human contact, and if we haven't met the person in person, we may be fooled.

I have been divorced for 9 years now. Since than I got blood cancer which put me on dialysis too. I had to have a bone marrow and also had chemo and dialysis 3 times a week. I was dating someone for 3 years when I was diagnosed. He was great however, I felt I couldn't carry on the relationship with all this on my plate and stress. I didn't want him to think he had to stay with me and I let him go. I later contacted him and he said he would have never left me. He has since found a girlfriend and is recently engaged. I got back on the online dating website and had 2 relationships, of course not at the same time. I've explained my medical history to both and they accepted it quite well. I truly understand your hesitation as I felt the same way and still do. I feel if you find someone and stay positive and honest with them it will be easier for them too. I wouldn't constantly talking about aches and pains. Try to stay happy and show him you are fun and know how to enjoy live. Good luck to you and I do hope you take the plunge to get on a dating website.

Honestly I’m not sure if remaining friends with the man you’ve been talking to is helpful to you. I think if you are feeling vulnerable and lonely right now, talking to him just fuels the longing (not for him but just someone) and loneliness.

I would be as social as you can right now, surround yourself with good friends and if you want to join a dating site, go for it.

But if you really do feel like you can’t be happy unless you are with someone, that is a very limiting way to see yourself and to live life. I think holding on to that is actually harmful.

I just wanted to let you know that there is a new treatment available for asthma - monoclonal antibody therapy. If your docs have not offered it to you, check it out. It has been showing amazing results for some patients.
Hugs

Hello,
While health issues may come in the way, ultimately that should not matter as much to someone else or to yourself unless it is entirely debilitating.

I have gone through a similar mindset of downsizing myself and trying to fit within other peoples view of myself instead of thinking clearly about it.
When considering needing another person, you should step back and ask yourself for the reasoning behind it. Is it for physical attraction, is it for companionship? What is actually making that notion nag inside your head.

Do not get me wrong, its not bad to want another person, but that can be a slippery slope to allow other people to take advantage of that mindset, So while out looking its good to be cautious and to not just jump to someone because of that want.

Stay safe.