If handling relatively tedious things like household chores or finances and bill paying, relatively routine, normal things require "living together" in order to determine whether a couple can survive, what happens when one of you are diagnosed with cancer or some other serious/fatal disease, what happens when you have a child with health problems, what happens when one of you lose a job. I'll tell you what - you are seriously f*cked, that's what.

Because it is that leap of faith that keeps you together when the shit hits the fan.

Of course, I am assuming one has done their due diligence into finding a potential partner. Sometimes I think people put more effort into researching the vehicle they are planning to purchase than the person they (suppossedly) intend to spend the rest of their with.

Id actually very much prefer it. Get to know eachother a bit more intimately; habits; whether we can handle it if we fight, etc. I wouldnt want to shack up after marriage. Would feel too much like walking blindly into a lion's den and knowing whether the lion has been de-toothed or not.

I think that if I were to get married, I would still want to live together first. I am not someone who handles a lot of changes at once very well. Having a big wedding, planning that, having family and whatnot in town, and being in the center of a big event would be VERY stressful for me. It would be an added stress if I was having to move right after that, or if someone was moving in with me.

Regardless of how well you know somebbody, there is an adjustment pariod after living together. About everything- who is using the bathroom first in the morning, who is cooking, who is cleaning, how are bills devided, organizational issues, house rules, etc... I would rather have those things worked out, and in more of a routine before getting married- and while trying to plan a wedding- than spend the first few months of marriage trying to get into the flow of things so to speak.

On top of that, my toddler's feelings are important to consider as well. A parent getting married is a huge change, then moving on top of it seems like a lot at once for my little girl. I would definitely want to ease into the changes for her sake as well as mine, and make sure that she was okay and comfortable with everything.

Once again, I think it's a personal preference thing. I have the upmost respect for couples who choose to do what you did, and wait to live together after marriage.

Whilst marriage is often seen just a piece of paper, these days, more and more cohabiting couples are seeing the wisdom of another piece of paper - a Cohabitation Agreement. I'm neither for or against either option, but if you're going to cohabit without the benefit of a Cohabitation Agreement, it's best to be aware that (depending where you live) there are few laws in place to protect you should things go wrong.

I would never get married again, the last time I lived with someone I was married...but I would love to live with a good man! When I owned my home in Ringwood, it was just me and my son and we were robbed over and over again! Locks broken the police ignored it, I bought my own home and after the rape well things changed!

I would love to live with a good man, I enjoy cooking, I enjoy making my man feel like the only one on the earth! I enjoy dressing up for him and all that great stuff but reality is there are not any good men around.. I have rules, NO SMOKING... NO DRUGS... I don't care if you drink once in a while but other then that ... NO WAY!

"If handling relatively tedious things like household chores or finances and bill paying, relatively routine, normal things require "living together" in order to determine whether a couple can survive, what happens when one of you are diagnosed with cancer or some other serious/fatal disease, what happens when you have a child with health problems, what happens when one of you lose a job. I'll tell you what - you are seriously f*cked, that's what."

That's when the rubber meets the road, isn't it? If you love the person who comes down with cancer, or your kid has health problems, or you lose a job, you either stick, or leave. A marriage certificate doesn't affect that one way or the other.

Adaptability is the key to survival. I think a lot of us are in comfort zone, like our lives a certain way, and, of course, life doesn't always go that way. If we adapt, we survive. The economic recession certainly put a damper on my plans! So I adapted. I got a second job, that has nothing to do with my higher-paying, higher-skilled former career. Is it what I want to be dealing with? No. But I adapted, and it's OK, quite pleasant.

As far as living together, I'm debating whether I'm living together material AT ALL. I like a certain amount of privacy and space. I like my life QUIET. But there is a certain draw in the warmth and comfort of being with a woman who is a supremely good cook, likes to dress up for me, we can quietly cuddle and talk, enjoy each other's bodies, each other's minds, each other's souls...

Whoever she is, she must be a quietly sedate yet sensual type...can't deal with the screaming, dramatic biotches, but a nice, soft, sedate soul...mmm...divine.

chicka: Maybe there are no good men in NEW JERSEY! Come on down here to South Florida. I'll treat you like a queen.

I don't smoke and don't do drugs, but I do drink occasionally lol. A buddy of mine and I enjoy a bit of rum on occasion, or beer. I have been known to partake of the brandy, maybe a margarita.

I do know my limits, however, and know that, if I go on a bender, I'll be paying for it for the next 36 hours with a wicked hangover, so I limit my alcohol to 2, maybe 3 mixed cocktails or 4 beers. Then I chill on the stuff, pee it out, and exercise next day, to restore normal health.