I think that being seriously in love with someone on every level of this word - emotional, chemical, physical - can be a stick with 2 ends.
On one end it is the most pleasurable, most consuming, most passionate, most hopeful experience of your life, but when it ends and/or you realize the other person does not feel the same way about you, at that particular time it feels like the most painful and self-destructive experience of your life, which lingers on and on for at least 6 months.
Sometimes I wonder how much less pain would have been in my life if I never fell in love (so far it happened twice, once at 14 and then 20 years later) .
I believe it is possible to have a loving, fulfilling relationship without being head over heels and this seems to be the best kind of relationship to me, when you love someone deeply, but you are not consumed with this person and if they left your life it would be sad and difficult, but it would not be like heroin withdrawal LOL

I guess what I'm saying is, in theory, in the perfect situation if would be amazing to meet a man who you would fall in love with and have his babies and live happily ever after, but it may not happen this way.

Just wish for love to come into your life and it will. Be ready for the craziest ride of your life ...this is how memories are made. Enjoy.

my theory is to not try so hard and it will come to you. before i met the love of my life, I was single for a while and was still heart broken from my previous ex. Then I starting to really appreciate myself. I had self confidence, independence, and love for myself. so I stopped trying so hard to find someone. Most men (at least the ones worth keeping around in my opinion) are usually attracted to self confident women. Besides, if you cant love or appreciate yourself first, how can you possibly love and appreciate someone else?

So once i had that pride in myself, I found the one. we met at a friends house. I had just got done marching/playing trumpet in a parade so i was dripping in sweet, wearing my friends clothes that didnt match or fit, and I was badly sun burnt from being outside all day and i didnt care. But when i met Jordan (my boyfriend) he said he instantly knew he was going to marry me. He had been single for 5 years before meeting me and he also began to stop trying to find someone. (He was also a hot mess when i met him, he was completely drunk!haha) but now we are talking about marriage and we already picked out my ring :) of course times get really tough (which is why im on this site) but trust me, its worth the wait, its worth the heart ache. just enjoy life, be yourself, and dont try so hard. Love is possible for everyone. Dont worry. if it worked for both Jordan and I it will work for you :)

All i know is that nothing worth having comes easy. hang in there. and good luck.

Thank you both for your kind words. it means alot. :)

Love will come. It's true what everyone says about not looking for it and it will happen. God knows, he made man and woman because we are meant to have a partner. I kind of agree with Aronia, it hurts really bad when love ends but then again I think it's better being in a relationship than being single. As you know being single isn't all that everyone says it is. Keep a positive attitude if you can.

I think love will come your way one day but it can hurt really bad and its not just like a fantasy all the time. But it is worth it. And also these days you don't need a man to have kids. I think children bring more joy and love that actually lasts then any man could bring.

Be careful what you wish for--you just may get it!!! And, when it comes, it's going to be a whirlwind. Then you'll wake up a few years older, with 5 kids, and wonder "how did I get HERE?"

That said, yes, sweet love does exist, it's just a matter of keeping yourself open to it, and that means keeping yourself WILLING to be hurt, WILLING to feel like a fool, etc. Be fearless about that stuff, and it will find you.

And be careful not to talk about babies too much. That stuff will happen in due course once you start making love. Any man who hears constant babies on the brain will begin to suspect that you're merely looking at him as a babymaker, that you merely need him to breed, and you don't care about his feelings at all.

My feeling is have the dinero, the money, in place, before you even think about making and raising babies. My career and income are pretty much in the shitter, therefore I've given up on the possibility of being a father, at age 46, which is a shame, 'cuz I love kids, and still have plenty of energy to chase them around.

(sigh) If life (making money) were just EASIER...

Trouble is, I need love and sex now. Therefore, splurging for sterilization or religious condom use seems the only option.

That's my "practical" thinking on love and romance at age 46, Miss 30 lol. This is what happens when you get older. Flowery notions and dreams of romance take a back-seat to hard reality, and what has already passed, and now living for TODAY, and working hard to simply maintain a stasis of health is all that matters.

Maybe if politicians actually get to work on setting up industry and manufacturing (not just service) jobs that pay at least $15 an hour, we'll all begin to prosper again and can make and raise babies galore, instead of both husband and wife working 60 hours a week and leaving their kids to be raised by babysitters and nannies.

What kind of parenting is that? We as parents should be doting, affectionate and involved in our kids' lives, but we can't when we both have to work 60 hours a week just to make ends meet. Want time? Have to give up money. Want money? Have to give up time. It's a vicious cycle/conundrum. Raising that hourly wage seems the only answer.

Sorry...had to rant.

Tawny, whatever you do. Please don't settle for marrying someone you don't really love, just because you want to have your family. It is not worth it!!

Tawny,

Don't give up the hope that you have. Focus on you, focus on being as happy as you can be, and focus on the being the kind of person whom you would want to date. It will come, and like others have said, it will likely come unexpectedly.

I'm 29 (30 in a couple of months) and have only recently found myself in love. I used to wonder if it would come. And it did come unexpectedly.

One of the things that I have learned is that it also comes from unexpected places. I had an idea of who and what I wanted, and my guy fits those ideas in many ways. But he doesn't in some ways. Still, he's exactly what I need.

I find myself now talking about marriage with him...my first, his second. He has three boys and an ex-wife as well. Not the ideal situation, but something I found myself well equipped to handle.

My point is, don't stop hoping, don't stop looking. It will come...but be open to things outside of the box as well.