Hello Daniel. Welcome to DS.

I seem to get myself into trouble every time I try to be the judge of what other people do or do not deserve. That is theirs to sort. Mine is to *simply* give them moral support and/or room to do their own sorting.

Inside my own strictly personals, relationships grow better with honesty and full disclosure. *I* deserve honest relationships, whatever the category the relationships are ultimately filed in.

On the action front, the end result is the same. I'm glad you are gonna tell her. Honesty is so-o-o-o much easier to work with.

I have the same opinion. Honesty is always best. You say this other woman is not ready for a serious relationship. Looks like you wanted to have that with her. Are you going to wait for her to be ready? I can see you are torn between two people. One that has so much in common with you but does not want to be in your life the way you'd like her to be and the other that looks like is there for you but with whom you don't have so much in common. That is a hard one. I think the decision will depend on what phase you are in your life. It all comes to what you want out of a relationship at this moment. People change in the course of a relationship, specially if it starts when we are very young. Maybe that other girl will not have so many interests in common with you in 5 years while the one you are with today will grow to be fond of some of the things you enjoy. Who knows? Just know that nothing is permanent and a good relationship depends a lot of both making sure of what they want out of it. I wish you the best of luck with the outcome.

You are going to tell her, and then what? I think it’s important to be honest but think beyond that too in terms of what you actually are looking for the outcome to be.

I agree honesty is the best policy… But, in the end what is it you want? Do you wanna continue your relationship with your girlfriend and that she knows that you would rather be with somebody else? Or are you just going to be considerate and break it off with her to pursue The relationship with the other girl?

It doesn't read like you had much more then a friendship with the other girl??… Is that true or am I reading this wrong?.... .You wrote she didn't want anything serious??


What does your new girlfriend need to know?

You're right, she does deserve to know. If your thoughts are consistently on another woman this early in your relationship then it is pretty unlikely that you would enjoy a lifelong relationship with her. Stop wasting her time...there is probably another man out there that will think she's hung the stars. Every woman deserves to feel like a queen in her man's eyes and once she finds out she is not your focus she will never feel like the queen of your heart. Please don't string her along and prolong the hurt.

I think, if you want to stay in a relationship with your current GF, it is selfish to tell her. She will be dating you and worry the entire time. If you are planning on leaving her, tell her.

I would agree with LettGoBreathe here. It is selfish and unfair of you to tell her. Don't. To what avail? If you want to be with this girl, know that information will only hurt her. there is no such thing as the truth will set you free when it comes to my guy thinks of another girl. Sometimes it is better not to know. Guys do all sorts of things girls don't want to know about when alone or with other guys. We really don't want to know. Because honestly if we don't it doesn't exist. You have not cheated. You are just thinking. Stop thinking and focus on your girl. Or move on and tell her why.

I am also wondering what is the point of telling the current GF? If you aren't that into the current GF, its best for her to let her go. If you are going to tell her and then let her go because she deserves better, then good for you. If you feel guilty with current GF because it feels like she loves you more than you love her, it is best to be honest with her. She may decide she'll wait it out and think she can change your mind. But if you know current GF is not the one, let her go and live an honest authentic life.

I'd recommend not telling your current girl friend.

Do breakup with her though as you are wasting her time as you are into her only for going out for tapas, Thai, sushi, and such.

Hey! Like alot of people have mentioned... I believe that honesty is the best solution. I want you to know that I am praying for you, bud.