Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.

To me, there is nothing worse than what others words and actions (or lack of them) can do to a person. What does your mother in law think of the whole thing? (Especially considering she too is noticing similarities with the older teen's issues?)
So very sorry you are having to deal with this. Hugs