Yikes... Have you tried letting it appear out of now where or do you usually search for people? Love SOMETIMES I know this sounds ridiculous but literally pops in your life like a gift. I agree with some of the people above work on being happy with just your self for right now a good person will notice your shining personality and be attracted to your goodness.

obviously it is being taken too literally when i say i am trying to "find" love - aren't we all. i'm not some desperate wench who sluts around the bars or throws myself at the first thing with a penis, so back off of those remarks. i have never actively searched for any of my relationships, they just happen.

seems most of you are too cynical to be compassionate and empathize with anyone.

I'm the same way you are...I try to mind my own business and love just happens. Actually I should say lust or I would be in a relationship. Up until two days ago I was dating this guy for 21 months who is also a work-a-holic. I just joined so you can go to my page and read my journal for the whole story. Anyway, after reading all the reply's I would have to conclude its definitely the whole commitment thing. Like I say in my journal, if you really like someone there is not one thing that can occupy your time so much you are unable to spend a reasonable amount of time with them. Also, I would have to say ol' boy was only upset you moved on cuz guys only want something when they cant have it.

angel: Here's a thought. Maybe these two men loved you, but your STYLE of love was different from theirs; yours was an all-encompassing, passionate fiery furnace...theirs was an oven on lukewarm with a silver lining of lust for frosting.

I don't know you all and I'm simply guessing here, but maybe your style of love was too smothering and intense for theirs. The right man, of course, would be able to handle your passion and counter it with his own, equally fiery furnace.

Where's that Marlboro Man or any one of those strong Aussie dudes when ya need 'em? Probably off drowning their passion in booze (sorry, bad joke).

Can I comment on the surprise you had when this recent guy starting crying. The surprise suggests to me that you guys really don't know each other. And that boils down to communication. That is where my marriage has failed so I'm not making some kind of judgement. Maybe, and I'm trying this if ever I am lucky enough to meet someone special again, but maybe you could try some really good, open honest talks with the next guy you meet, to set a foundation of honesty with each other. That is what I beleive intimacy is. And it's not about you finding out about who he is, as much as you letting him know exactly who you are, the good stuff and the bad stuff, right up front. Thats my approach now, and I'm surprised that I have met some ladies, not for relationship but just good friends (they are all married) who are pleasantly surprised at my candor. You might even want to go back to this guy and try to start all over again. I don't know.

Come on angelite! You're giving up after just two? ;-) I'm sorry your relationships didn't work out. Try figuring out what attracted you to the last two partners and see if that's what ultimately lead to them leaving. Then you can avoid dates with those attributes in the future.

I believe in this saying:

If they really want to see you, they will FIND TIME.

Maybe they found a purpose in work. There is something to be said for effort rewarded with money.

Not to say relationships can't be rewarding, but I guess you have to ask what feelings were important to both parties.