Healing Infidelity Through Faith Community Group
A place for those experiencing infidelity, rebuilding from infidelity, or dealing with the aftermath of infidelity, both unfaithful and hurt partners, and to be free to express how our faith, primarily Christians but others are also welcome, has or is being used to deal with our issues and hurts. All posters are expected to be respectful of each others faith experiences...
My ex and I broke up a couple of weeks ago. 15 days to be exact. 5 days ago I told her I would give her the space she needs and I'll be a better man, should she decide to come back. I cheated on her and we were trying to work it out. I didn't acknowledge or respect the efforts that she was making so she left. I either wanted to send this or go to her house to recite it in person. Please give me your feedback.
Anyone that's been cheated on, or betrayed, please read... Let me know if you would like to receive this letter or if you encourage sending it.
Dear _______,
I still love you very much. I think about you every day when I wake up, every night before I go to sleep, and all day in between. I pray that God grants us the chance to come back together. I also ask that if that is not his will, to then give me the strength to move on. I don’t want to though, _______. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to attend church with you and build a relationship that is strong in our mutual, trust, love, respect, and faith. I’ll do everything differently. I never acknowledged how hard it was for you to keep forgiving me. I wish I had. I know now how powerful of a person it takes to do that over and over again.
You surprise me and impress me with your incredible resilience and willingness to forgive. Those qualities in you are perfect examples of why I found God. You took me to church to give me the chance to change, to provoke his movement in my heart and he truly has _______. His presence does make me stronger and my prayers to him are being heard. He makes me stronger every day, but for some reason, he won’t let me move from you. I know it’s only been a couple of weeks since we last saw each other, but still. I remember everything you said about Him. I know now why you wished to practice your faith more. It’s an incredible feeling.
I know that I still have a lot of work on myself to do. I’ve kept my promises about deleting my Facebook and Instagram and I feel great. I have told a lot of girls that I won't be talking to them again, I even took screenshots of the messages to prove it, should you wish to see them. I said I was trying to work things out with you and I couldn't speak to them. Truthfully, I'm just glad to have them out of my life. Their friendships really didn't mean anything and I'm glad that I have a few less people to worry about. I will continue to work on my empathy and understanding of other people and their feelings and problems. Even you said that you saw changes in me, _______. I am so close to feeling whole and secure. I don’t have a desire to invite over girls or to spend time with anyone other than my roommates and myself (aside from you, of course). I don’t even invite Ryan or any of those guys over anymore. I also won’t be drinking or smoking anymore, indefinitely. Maybe even for good, who knows? I know how important sobriety is when working on getting my head on straight. I am trying to quit smoking cigarettes but that’s a little difficult these days.
I want to pray with you and grow closer to God with you. You were my angel _______. You were brought to me, to show me to Him. I believe that. I’m incredibly grateful and I want to spend my life showing you that. I need to cherish you, and care for you. I want to make you smile and laugh and feel safe and secure. You used to talk about how you need C.P.I.. I know I can give you what you need now.
Commitment-
_______, I am yours. I will never stray again. I will make sure that you are taken care of and that you never have to worry about heart break again. I want to build our relationship and I want to start building a life together. I want to grow WITH you, not apart from you. You are my inspiration, and the love of my life. You’ve pushed me to new heights, emotionally and spiritually. I love you with all of my heart and I’ll never do anything again to push you away, or hurt you. I want to stay with you so we can get married, and have a house, and beautiful children. I told you a long time ago that I could spend the rest of my life with you and if you allowed me one more chance to make that happen, I would not squander it. I know now, that it is only you that I want and only you that I need. I love you _______.
Passion-
We share the same passions. I used to think that we didn’t, but I have found a love for animals and my family and my friends, the way that you have. We share love for things like movies, music, and art but I know that you are passionate about keeping your friends, and family safe and happy and I believe in that principle as well. My brother and I have gotten closer and I am always looking out for my dad and my mom. I have recently consoled them through a rough patch they just had. My dad was being a jerk (like I was) and I urged him to rethink his actions. He did, and now they’re back on track. It made me feel so good to be there for them.
I know that I’m still fresh, but our faith in God is now a mutual passion. I have felt his love and the peace that one does feel from it. I wish to walk a better path and continue living clean without lies, or deceit, or infidelity. I want to show God how much I love him by caring for you because after all, it was you that brought me to him. I want to attend church with you every Sunday and I want to build our faith together. I would love it if you would educate me on your knowledge of His word as well.
Intimacy-
Physically, I do not believe we have had any issues with this. However, emotionally we have. I’ve been cold, and distant, and inconsiderate of how you feel. I want to be there for you _______. I want to help you with your woes and worries. I want to be the rock you cling to in stormy waters and the hand that helps you out once they’ve stopped. I was too selfish and arrogant to give myself to you before but if you’ll take it, my heart, soul, and body are your’s _______. I want to kiss your hands and forehead and nose and your lips. I want to look you in the eyes and tell you I love you without uttering a single word. You’ll never feel alone again Arryana. Please just let me show you I love you, forever.
I hope to hear from you soon and I love you dearly.
Anyone that's been cheated on, or betrayed, please read... Let me know if you would like to receive this letter or if you encourage sending it.
Dear _______,
I still love you very much. I think about you every day when I wake up, every night before I go to sleep, and all day in between. I pray that God grants us the chance to come back together. I also ask that if that is not his will, to then give me the strength to move on. I don’t want to though, _______. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to attend church with you and build a relationship that is strong in our mutual, trust, love, respect, and faith. I’ll do everything differently. I never acknowledged how hard it was for you to keep forgiving me. I wish I had. I know now how powerful of a person it takes to do that over and over again.
You surprise me and impress me with your incredible resilience and willingness to forgive. Those qualities in you are perfect examples of why I found God. You took me to church to give me the chance to change, to provoke his movement in my heart and he truly has _______. His presence does make me stronger and my prayers to him are being heard. He makes me stronger every day, but for some reason, he won’t let me move from you. I know it’s only been a couple of weeks since we last saw each other, but still. I remember everything you said about Him. I know now why you wished to practice your faith more. It’s an incredible feeling.
I know that I still have a lot of work on myself to do. I’ve kept my promises about deleting my Facebook and Instagram and I feel great. I have told a lot of girls that I won't be talking to them again, I even took screenshots of the messages to prove it, should you wish to see them. I said I was trying to work things out with you and I couldn't speak to them. Truthfully, I'm just glad to have them out of my life. Their friendships really didn't mean anything and I'm glad that I have a few less people to worry about. I will continue to work on my empathy and understanding of other people and their feelings and problems. Even you said that you saw changes in me, _______. I am so close to feeling whole and secure. I don’t have a desire to invite over girls or to spend time with anyone other than my roommates and myself (aside from you, of course). I don’t even invite Ryan or any of those guys over anymore. I also won’t be drinking or smoking anymore, indefinitely. Maybe even for good, who knows? I know how important sobriety is when working on getting my head on straight. I am trying to quit smoking cigarettes but that’s a little difficult these days.
I want to pray with you and grow closer to God with you. You were my angel _______. You were brought to me, to show me to Him. I believe that. I’m incredibly grateful and I want to spend my life showing you that. I need to cherish you, and care for you. I want to make you smile and laugh and feel safe and secure. You used to talk about how you need C.P.I.. I know I can give you what you need now.
Commitment-
_______, I am yours. I will never stray again. I will make sure that you are taken care of and that you never have to worry about heart break again. I want to build our relationship and I want to start building a life together. I want to grow WITH you, not apart from you. You are my inspiration, and the love of my life. You’ve pushed me to new heights, emotionally and spiritually. I love you with all of my heart and I’ll never do anything again to push you away, or hurt you. I want to stay with you so we can get married, and have a house, and beautiful children. I told you a long time ago that I could spend the rest of my life with you and if you allowed me one more chance to make that happen, I would not squander it. I know now, that it is only you that I want and only you that I need. I love you _______.
Passion-
We share the same passions. I used to think that we didn’t, but I have found a love for animals and my family and my friends, the way that you have. We share love for things like movies, music, and art but I know that you are passionate about keeping your friends, and family safe and happy and I believe in that principle as well. My brother and I have gotten closer and I am always looking out for my dad and my mom. I have recently consoled them through a rough patch they just had. My dad was being a jerk (like I was) and I urged him to rethink his actions. He did, and now they’re back on track. It made me feel so good to be there for them.
I know that I’m still fresh, but our faith in God is now a mutual passion. I have felt his love and the peace that one does feel from it. I wish to walk a better path and continue living clean without lies, or deceit, or infidelity. I want to show God how much I love him by caring for you because after all, it was you that brought me to him. I want to attend church with you every Sunday and I want to build our faith together. I would love it if you would educate me on your knowledge of His word as well.
Intimacy-
Physically, I do not believe we have had any issues with this. However, emotionally we have. I’ve been cold, and distant, and inconsiderate of how you feel. I want to be there for you _______. I want to help you with your woes and worries. I want to be the rock you cling to in stormy waters and the hand that helps you out once they’ve stopped. I was too selfish and arrogant to give myself to you before but if you’ll take it, my heart, soul, and body are your’s _______. I want to kiss your hands and forehead and nose and your lips. I want to look you in the eyes and tell you I love you without uttering a single word. You’ll never feel alone again Arryana. Please just let me show you I love you, forever.
I hope to hear from you soon and I love you dearly.
lovemarriage
Beautiful letter. It would mean a lot to be the recipient of such a heartfelt expression. At the same time, always remember that actions speak louder than words. Not to say you shouldn't send or give her the letter :) I totally think you should. I would say to follow your heart on how to deliver this to her. Ask God to guide and direct you with this specific situation. I'm always suprised when I release whatever I'm struggling with to God. I'm forever in awe of the lengths he goes to protect me. Sometimes it requires pain, but in the end it always ends up being what was for the best.
deleted_user
I will ask God. I have been praying every night that he shows me direction of some kind. I am going to deliver itIn person. I will wait a little longer so I can give her a chance to think a little more. She deserves a chance to take some time to herself. I want to make sure that I'm ready and with a little more time, I hope she would be ready too.
musclegirl
If you are a drinker or alcoholic, promising to stop drinking will not work. You will have to go to AA and do the twelve step program to get healing. It is the closest thing to the bible "condensed" that you will ever find. Alcoholics makes promises and intends to keep them, but it is impossible because of their addiction. When an alcoholic makes a promise, as I say, the INTEND to keep it, but can't. The fact that you mention sobriety is what made me think of this. If your drinking is what caused your problems, quitting is not going to solve it. By just quitting you become a dry drunk, but by following the 12 step program, that is the ONLY way to use your higher power (God) to truly make you a recovering alcoholic. This is a gorgeous and beautiful letter but my husband made me these promises on a daily basis while drinking and broke every single one of them, every day or at least every time he drank, (which sometimes were every 2nd or third and in the early stages every forth day. So unless you become really sober and not just a dry drunk, this letter will mean nothing, because chances are you've told her these things repeatedly during blackouts. Please don't feel attacked by my comment, since I don't know your situation EXACTLY, so I might completely be off course here. My husband is a recovering alcoholic for 2 years now, and at least now when he promises something, he is able to keep that promise.
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