Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
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Pinky has been coming to our house every weekend. Maybe she's high sometimes, maybe not (my husband often thinks she is, but she claims it's her "nerve pills" or Suboxone).
She seems to be straight virtually the whole weekend, but who knows? I suppose as long as it isn't obvious there's no use taking action.
Anyway, she finally got a job, waitressing. So we'll probably lose her on the weekends, since they're starting her on the graveyard shift and she doesn't know which days yet.
Then she calls last night, all upset, because LoverBoy (the perfect man she was going to marry HAH) split her lip and put his booted foot on her throat. I told her to get into a women's shelter, and she told me this morning she called.
She also told me that he's "such a liar" - he is. He lied to her about his age and about certain texts that came from his phone. She said he's threatening to call my husband and tell us that she's "drinking all day" and "doing drugs."
So now we have TWO liars. Liar vs. Liar, like that old Mad Magazine "Spy vs. Spy" HAHAHA.
Of course LoverBoy won't call, and who cares, anyway? If I have to decide between two liars my brain gets all kaflooey, and what difference would it make, anyway?
I think Pinky was waiting for me to beg her to come and live with us, because she said "I don't want you to think that I'm trying to move in with you and my dad." Mmm-hmmm. The underlying message was "rescue me!!!!!"
Ain't happening. She got herself into yet another mess and it's about time she figured out how to get out of it. She's 37 years old, for crying out loud!!!!!
YIKES!!!!
She seems to be straight virtually the whole weekend, but who knows? I suppose as long as it isn't obvious there's no use taking action.
Anyway, she finally got a job, waitressing. So we'll probably lose her on the weekends, since they're starting her on the graveyard shift and she doesn't know which days yet.
Then she calls last night, all upset, because LoverBoy (the perfect man she was going to marry HAH) split her lip and put his booted foot on her throat. I told her to get into a women's shelter, and she told me this morning she called.
She also told me that he's "such a liar" - he is. He lied to her about his age and about certain texts that came from his phone. She said he's threatening to call my husband and tell us that she's "drinking all day" and "doing drugs."
So now we have TWO liars. Liar vs. Liar, like that old Mad Magazine "Spy vs. Spy" HAHAHA.
Of course LoverBoy won't call, and who cares, anyway? If I have to decide between two liars my brain gets all kaflooey, and what difference would it make, anyway?
I think Pinky was waiting for me to beg her to come and live with us, because she said "I don't want you to think that I'm trying to move in with you and my dad." Mmm-hmmm. The underlying message was "rescue me!!!!!"
Ain't happening. She got herself into yet another mess and it's about time she figured out how to get out of it. She's 37 years old, for crying out loud!!!!!
YIKES!!!!
She says she has a waitressing job - from 11pm to 7am. She doesn't have her permanent schedule yet. She was supposed to visit on Monday, since she didn't have to go back to work until 11pm Tuesday.
She didn't call me until 3pm Monday, and said that Loverboy (the one who split her lip) would drive her here after he finished work, then pick her up Tuesday after work.
I pointed out that she wouldn't get to our house until at least 8pm Monday, and wouldn't get home until at least 8pm Tuesday - she'd have two hours' sleep before an all-night shift. She said that was fine.
I suggested that she wait until she gets her permanent schedule, then it would be easier for her to figure out the best days and times to take the bus here. Of course she didn't want to do that -- that would be taking sensible advice. So she got testy, I got testy and she hung up.
Then she left a 10-minute message with my husband, telling him that I "hate her" (here we go again) and "wouldn't let her come down to see HER kids." I found out later that she regularly tells the kids that I hate her, too.
I have decided that from now on, I will tell all family members that Pinky is the most wonderful person I've ever known in my entire life. And if Pinky EVER tries to confide in me about Loverboy again I will shut her down. After all, if I hate her, why am I still the ONLY one who actually stays on the phone while she whines and cries?
GGGGGGRRRRRRRRR.
Pinky was SO DESPERATE to see "her kids" that she was willing to come to our house at 8pm Monday and leave 8pm on Tuesday -- getting only two hours' sleep before starting an 8-hour shift. She wanted to see "her kids" SO BADLY that she got angry with me for pointing out that this didn't seem like such a good idea and that she should wait 'til she got her permanent schedule. She wanted to see her kids SO BADLY that she whined to my husband that I hate her.
She hasn't even CALLED THE KIDS except for later that night (the 16th).
And she accidentally texted me to tell (someone) that she got a second job.
What a MORON! No, I didn't hate her before, but it's starting to seem like a good idea. :-)
Maybe it's time to re-think the stepchild and not deal with her. Don't take her calls, don't allow her to come over unless your husband is home and you go out and walk the mall for some deserved relaxation activity. For overnight stays, go out come home and go to bed. You don't deserve to be treated like that . You're taking care of her children and your husbands GC.
Naturally, it all falls to me. My husband works weekends, and that's been when Pinky has visited -- so I was stuck with her. Now that she's waitressing (at least for this week) I don't know when she'll be able to come down. And every single time, without exception, she has started using when she watiresses.
So we'll see which goes first -- her job or her alleged sobriety.
I believe that they all; my husband, his ex and daughter tried to make me the reason for their failures....I put a stop to that, set boundaries and told everyone they are responsible for their own relationships not me. I don't have that problem with my kids or with my ex and his wife! The sad thing is I can see how they "my husband and his ex" screwed up their daughter. We now haven't seen my step daughter for years!!! I like her, and it was important for her to be a sister to our two daughters...she is still a kid and needs to be loved by all of us, even if she is now 28 yrs old....so sad, I get mad when I think about what happen to her...she can't keep a job, so materialistic because her mother would buy her lots of things so she wouldn't come visit us. Plus, she always had problems with relationships...her mother had a boyfriend who tried to sexually assault my step daughter and her mother told her he was just joking around with her. She begged her not to tell us or we would take her away, yada...yada, yada....my step daughter started dressing sexy in her early teen years and I told my husband there was something wrong!!! We found out after she was 18yrs old when her boyfriend told us because he said he was tired of hearing her mom bad mouthing us and telling all kinds of lies about us so they wouldn't come to see us....That poor Girl...you can't take that stuff back!!!
I'm almost 100% positive that Pinky is using again. She told her brother that she's living in a shelter and "needed a TV." So her brother went right out and bought her one. HAHAHA. Some people never learn. And the stories she told me aren't matching with what she told other family members, which is Sign Number One.
Well, the good news is that she probably won't be coming here for a while. The bad news is that I've lost my babysitter. But our eldest will be 13 next month -- and I've already started testing them with short errands. Keeping our fingers crossed. The 13-year-old is fine. The question will be whether the younger two will listen to her :-0