Gastric Bypass Surgery Support Group
Gastric bypass (GBP) is any of a group of similar operative procedures used to treat morbid obesity, a condition which arises from severe accumulation of excess weight in the form of fatty tissue, and the health problems ("co-morbidities") which result. If you are considering gastric bypass or have had it, join the community where we share our experiences and find support.
So.... I've been "attacked " by the preop food monster! He has had a hold of me pretty much ever since the request to the INS company was sent in last Tuesday.
Then today, when I got my date, well... then not only did the monster attack again, but with the weirdest emotional roller coaster ride to go with. I have to say up front, I can be a crier :) Not like unhappy tears per say, just cry easily like at hallmark commercials and sappy movies. I finally decided a few years ago it is just who I am :)
However, today's tears have been all over the place... I imagine similar to someone getting ready to check into rehab... or maybe kinda like when I divorced my 1st husband.
Its like I've been in this relationship with a friend who I could always always always count on to be there for me... always! Thru it all I knew the friend was no good for me.... But I kept going back.... Even with the years of dieting, my old faithful and unhealthy relationship was still there!
Having surgery is like cutting the ties to this old friend. I know most of you know exactly what I am taking about. Today has been similar to when I kicked my ex out... I knew he had to go. I knew he was not healthy for me, even abusive. I knew I was better off without him. But after 16 years, it was still very hard to do!
Tonight, for my birthday my hubby took me out to dinner (A last splurge of sorts, good or bad, its what it is)... i ate good food and too much of it. Now... it is time to kick it to the curb. Cause my old friend no longer serves my needs. It is a painful yet necessary action. I know what I need now has nothing to do with this destructive relationship. ONLY a foodie would have to do this and only a foodie could begin to understand this relationship....
As I was boobing in the car to my hubby, telling him it was like ending a relationship with a friend I could always count on to be there for me... the dear sweet man says "sweetie, you have me... I'll always be here for me" This is wonderful, and I of course told him so... but then I also realized right then and there, that yeah he would always be there for me,and will always love me no matter what... But now... Now its time for ME to be there for ME and to love ME no matter what! That's what its time for...
And time to start focusing on where I want to go, rather than where I've been.
ENOUGH with this stupid eating! ENOUGH with this food relationship that is killing me! Tomorrow is a new day... and I am kicking the preop food monster to the friggin curb!
Yeah, I'm still gonna cry! Its who I am... But I gotta get a grip and let go! All at the same time :)
Love you guys! I really do!
Then today, when I got my date, well... then not only did the monster attack again, but with the weirdest emotional roller coaster ride to go with. I have to say up front, I can be a crier :) Not like unhappy tears per say, just cry easily like at hallmark commercials and sappy movies. I finally decided a few years ago it is just who I am :)
However, today's tears have been all over the place... I imagine similar to someone getting ready to check into rehab... or maybe kinda like when I divorced my 1st husband.
Its like I've been in this relationship with a friend who I could always always always count on to be there for me... always! Thru it all I knew the friend was no good for me.... But I kept going back.... Even with the years of dieting, my old faithful and unhealthy relationship was still there!
Having surgery is like cutting the ties to this old friend. I know most of you know exactly what I am taking about. Today has been similar to when I kicked my ex out... I knew he had to go. I knew he was not healthy for me, even abusive. I knew I was better off without him. But after 16 years, it was still very hard to do!
Tonight, for my birthday my hubby took me out to dinner (A last splurge of sorts, good or bad, its what it is)... i ate good food and too much of it. Now... it is time to kick it to the curb. Cause my old friend no longer serves my needs. It is a painful yet necessary action. I know what I need now has nothing to do with this destructive relationship. ONLY a foodie would have to do this and only a foodie could begin to understand this relationship....
As I was boobing in the car to my hubby, telling him it was like ending a relationship with a friend I could always count on to be there for me... the dear sweet man says "sweetie, you have me... I'll always be here for me" This is wonderful, and I of course told him so... but then I also realized right then and there, that yeah he would always be there for me,and will always love me no matter what... But now... Now its time for ME to be there for ME and to love ME no matter what! That's what its time for...
And time to start focusing on where I want to go, rather than where I've been.
ENOUGH with this stupid eating! ENOUGH with this food relationship that is killing me! Tomorrow is a new day... and I am kicking the preop food monster to the friggin curb!
Yeah, I'm still gonna cry! Its who I am... But I gotta get a grip and let go! All at the same time :)
Love you guys! I really do!
OMG....I so understand....I ate everything twice that I know will be off limits.. Thanks for posting this made me feel much better knowing it wasn't just me feeling this way. I am on day 2 of the pre-op liquid diet, surgery in just 6 days! Congrats on getting your date!
I asked my husband if he was ready to lose his eating partner. He works nights I work days...we see each other just on the weekends for the most part. And what we do together is go out to eat...breakfast, lunch or dinner .....He said he was ready to have me be healthy so we can learn to do other things together. I have the best husband!
Oh, you deft make us feel like we're not alone! THank you for that, and all of your wonderful insight that you share!
I too as I mentioned have had those times lately, (my surgery should be towards the end of August), that I have given in to. Bad food choices.
So, I had my endoscopy on Monday, and the surgeon asked me if I had lost any more weight. I said I didn't know, cause I didn't have a scale anymore, and have to buy one. I was having my vitals checked per my long term health insurance program I am involved with, and it stopped, and they took the scale.
So, this is my wake up call, to start doing what he told me to. Just eat low fat, low sugar, high protein, and practice now, before the 2 weeks b4 surgery.
Then, I am supposed to have protein shakes, and liquids during the day, and a balance meal at night-with 3 oz of protein, veggies etc.. for dinner.
I have to prepare myself this next 4 weeks, to start that. My mind and body need to get used to this now.
I do notice lately, that when I do eat bad food, I don't feel good after I eat it, and I know my "taste" for it, is slowly diminishing. When I eat good meals, like tuna for lunch, or baked chicken or fish , and veggies for dinner, I feel so much better!
That's a good thing!
Ok, sleep well, and i'm glad you are a part of this family of wonderful people!
Betsy
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"I am new here and I just have to give a huge thank you for your post!!!! My daughter (18) asked me why I seemed apprehensive about the surgery (that now looks like it is actually going to happen) because she knows that its something that I have thought about and wanted for 10 years. I couldn't make her understand my fears for after the surgery. The fears that no one gets...not the I might die fears, not the I might have complications fear......the fear of food no longer being a source of comfort. She just said, "but mom you won't be hungry and you'll feel so much better....so what you're going to be angry because you can't have something?!" I told her I didn't know what to say and I honestly don't know how I'll feel and that it's just something she can't understand. I left the room and got on the computer and came to TT and this was the first post I saw. After I read it I called her into the room and with tears flowing....read it to her. She started crying and said she was sorry and didn't understand and would be there and if I needed to get angry that she would understand and try to help me through it. We then had a family meeting and I let my husband and son read it. I hope it's ok, I have copied it to a document so that I will always have the words when I can't find them myself! Thank you for your honesty and openness!"
God Bless!
Sonya
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I invited Sonya to come here to DS and join us! I sure hope she does!
Here is a link to the entire thread:
http://www.thinnertimesforum.com/topic/85490-preop-food-monster-saying-good-bye/#entry962457
-Angie
Sonya