Gastric Bypass Surgery Support Group

Gastric bypass (GBP) is any of a group of similar operative procedures used to treat morbid obesity, a condition which arises from severe accumulation of excess weight in the form of fatty tissue, and the health problems ("co-morbidities") which result. If you are considering gastric bypass or have had it, join the community where we share our experiences and find support.

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hope81026 03/02/2011

My best friends father is in the hospital dyin of lung Cancer (non-smoker),
I have done everything I can think of to show I care.
I have sent boxes of homemade foods, ( when he went into the hospital and his wife just had lung surgery herself) but this is the only thing I can think of to do. His wife is fine now however he is not doing so well.
I am only close to this man in the sense that I know he is good and he is my best friend of 40 years father.
I want to visit and bring a gift because he is coherant but only has days. They want him to keep fighting but it is over (they know)
I don't want to go empty handed but what is appropriate?
I have goggled this and still haven't come to a conclusion.
You guys are all I have right now.

deleted_user 03/02/2011

You are so kind to want to help. Another thing that you can do is to help the family. Offer to do their laundry, water thei house plants, take care of their pets - whatever they don't have time to do because they are at the bedside. You could even run errands such as picking up the drycleaning, etc. Anything that you do will be appreciated.
Bonnie

hope81026 03/02/2011

@ bonnie I already am on the standby for babysitting the little ones, chauffering, and anything else, she has my full support anytime which she understands.
I was able to cut Don's hair last week. He was too proud to let anyone else do it however when my friend suggesed that I could come to the hospital and do the job he finally agreed.
I was so happy to be able to do that for him.

I cannot find ANYTHING suitable to give for replanting in our darn miserable cold Northren weather. The ground is frozen and it's just not possible. Even buying a small tree or shrub for the spring is not an option here.
So I am getting ready to leave with 3 fresh new pairs of thick cozy mens socks tied up in a pretty lavender ribbon.. I am just not the type of person who goes empty handed, thats just me.
I will let him know that I will be here for everyone even his precious best friend (dog) Paddy whom he is so worried about.
I'll do my best...

deleted_user 03/02/2011

favourite music, favourite alcholic drink, bring the family coffee... just be there... sometimes that is all that is needed support for your friend.

prayers for your friend and family
jenn

deleted_user 03/02/2011

Hi Hope,

I'm sorry to hear this. Sound like you are doing all you can and I am sure your bf is aware. Just be there for her. My prayers and thoughts are with you.

Allen

deleted_user 03/02/2011

One of my favorite Aunt's just died and really the best thing you can give is yourself. Go there, hold his hand Give your BF a hug. Buy her a coffee, take her lunch, or offer to stay with him while she goes home for a shower or change of clothes. Give her a massage certificate to use when it is all done and over with. He really doesn't need anything at this time other than your love and support. She will need your love and support for a long time to come. Your presence is the best thing you can offer at this time, and if you can do it, pray with them. I have never met anyone who didn't want to be prayed for during this time. I know some people aren't comfortable with praying outloud and then just hold his hand and let him know you are praying for him.

Hugs and Prayers during this difficult time,

Laura

hope81026 03/02/2011

Thank-you again to everyone who supported and encouraged me.
I am sure it will be public record soon so I believe it's safe to say Donald Byerley 78, passed away peacefully at 6pm March 2, 2011
May He Rest in Peace
Again Thank-you

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