Hi, ask yourself some questions...

What is holding you back?
Are you not ready to let go?
What are your issues with food?

Make an appt with a therapist to discuss, I hope you can dig deep and find it! xoxo

I agree 100% with Alexis and not only that your profile stated you wanted to live many more years for your children....Just keep telling yourself that...I know its easier said then done but just remember your babies need you around....and 20lbs seems like alot but it will be LIFE changing for you and its just the start line to a health and LONG happy life! If you need to vent feel free to contact me sweetie :) I havent had the surgery yet and I need to lose some weight too Im sure so I dont mind being your sounding board.

Hi Anne, it's debby. I'm sorry that you are having a tough time but it happens and I'm in that struggling phase too so you are not alone. I have to lose 21lbs by July. I've lost 11 but I keep fluctuating back and forth by 2 pounds. I get weighed in tomorrow. Yikes!
But like I said you are not alone. Here's what my nut told us...eat 300 calories at breakfast, 400 cal at lunch and 500 cal at dinner. If you have to have a snack don't make it more than 100 cal 2x day. When it is broken down it is easier to follow.
I recently joined my fitness pal.com. You can keep track of all your eating and exercising. It figures the calories out for you. Since I write it on there I am starting to control what I eat better. You might want to try that.

Other than that...'SLAP,SLAP!" Now does that help? haha I'm here if you want to talk. We can support each other or just slap each other when we get out of line. teehee Good luck.debby

I think you should read your post and ask yourself after the surgery when your surgeon, your primary care doctor, and your nutritionist, are each giving you a long list of what you can't eat and drink, what are you going to do then??? Because if your problem is with being told you can't or you have to (there will also be a long list of you have to's), then I think you probably need to address that issue within yourself before having this major surgery. I wish you the best.

Stop fightng it. Make good food choices, get some exercise and forget about it. When you relax and just change your lifetyle, it will come off. You are over thinking it. I was losing weight while pre op and as soon as I stopped to analyze what i was doing right to cause it, i started messing up. Cut your fat, carbs and portions, even if it isnt 100% where you need to be. Then the next week, cut something else like sugar drinks or a secomd helping. Say no once on a while and instead of a bag of chips, grab an apple. Once the weight starts coming off, you will no
t want to see it end, so that will give you the encouragement to continue.

I want to thank everyone for responding...I think I am feeling sorry for myself...I am over it...for the moment....I realized even with what I ate today I am still pretty close to my target today....@happy I appreciate the reality check and I think (which I probably shouldn't do) the difference is I have been having people tell me to just lose some weight all my life...I know after the surgery there will be a lot of you can't and you have too's...but in my mind they are different...if I don't I will be physically ill or in pain...eating at the moment doesn't cause me that pain or illness...at least I don't feel it right away...
@can'tbe I think you are right I am over thinking all of this I know what I need to do and how to do it now I just gotta stop worrying and do it...I was looking at fitness pal and realized even with my slip up today i am still close to my target calories and as long as I am careful at dinner I can be very close at the end of the day...
Tomorrow is another day and I will succeed...because I can!!!

I have been on this journey for almost 10 years and finally had surgery on Dec 19, 2011...

I went through all of my pre op testing and got my approvals twice before and walked away because people told me I could do it myself. I DID do it, and then the weight came back with reinforcements.

I was caught in a vicious cycle that ended with a weight related condition called pseudotumor cerebri at age 35 (Fluid on my brain, 90% hearing loss in my right ear, terrible migraines and a mini stroke came with that condition).

I finally decided to choose ME. I went through 3 months of medically supervised weight loss with the Nut at my bariatric program starting last August and I can't tell you how FREE I feel now. I am nearly 90 lbs lighter than I was in December 2010 when the pseudotumor cerebri started and I am happier than I ever could have imagined.

My only regret is not having chosen myself years ago and saving myself from the PTC and it's not so jolly bad of life thieves.

"eating at the moment doesn't cause me that pain or illness...at least I don't feel it right away"

Eating the wrong things is absolutely causing you pain...or you wouldn't be working to have surgery!!! Emotional pain, physical pain (I remember my legs and back hurting so much). Although surgery will give you a powerful tool to help you lose weight, you can't count on pain to keep you from eating things you shouldnt. Not everyone dumps. The urge to snack doesn't stay away forever.

Some of the best advice I got pre-surgery was to start eating like I'd already had GBS. Protein first at every meal. Limit white foods and simple carbs. Don't drink with meals (or 30 minutes before and after). Eat mindfully - don't distract yourself with the TV, reading, the computer, etc while you eat. Always eat sitting down and take the time to savor every bite. Pay attention to how each bite tastes and how your body feels. When you are satisfied - stop eating. Pre-surgery, I ate 3 meals a day with no snacking. I didn't add snacks back into my diet until I was over 5 months out from surgery. The "no snacking" thing was hard at first, but it helped me get a handle on the habit eating, boredom eating, stress eating, and emotional eating that got me to 300 lbs.

Oh, and "slap"! Come on, now!! You know you want this! (and its worth it!!)

JJ

It is tough sometimes. I am preop also. I found what really helped me it myfitnesspal.com It logs all food you eat, water and exercise. I joined mid Jan and have lost around 26 pounds. I like being able to see how many nutrients I have consumed also which it shows you. When I first started I wasn't getting enough protein so I switched to greek yogurt and now hit my protein goal and go over daily in protein.
I find what works for me also is not to bring the foods that you over eat and aren't good for you into the house. I know ice cream is somthing I can't buy at the grocery store cause I will eat the entire container so I buy the skinny cow ice cream sandwiches and have one a day. I still get a treat but in moderation.
I am motivated to stay on track and get that surgery date. I wasn't told I had to loose a certain amount or % before I could get a date but I want to start changing my eating habits now so when I do have WLS it will be easier.
Good luck!! You can do it!!

I struggled with the decision for a few years, then when I was really ready, i went for it. lost 26 lbs. and it was not hard. if you really want it and your ready you can do it .. its so worth it.. my only regret is waiting sooo long...